I came across this today and thought it was a great letter. It speaks for itself.
Gay guy’s letter defending gay brother to their father goes viral
Gay guy’s letter defending gay brother to their father goes viral
Dear Dad,
- Thread starter keenobserver
- Start date
My coming out to my family (at age 36!) was traumatic and hilarious (another conservative Southern family). But soon my mom was diagnosed with terminal brain cancer and she wanted to move to acceptance fairly quickly. Her family was very open to me and lived my husband.
Dad, on the other hand, said, "Don't expect that my brothers and sisters will be so accepting." It took longer, but eventually aunts and uncles were wanting to sit beside my husband at family gatherings and dad became a gay rights advocate!
My brother, sister and cousins are still not so comfortable with my orientation, but I don't give a fuck anymore!
Odd that the younger generation is so much less open.
Dad, on the other hand, said, "Don't expect that my brothers and sisters will be so accepting." It took longer, but eventually aunts and uncles were wanting to sit beside my husband at family gatherings and dad became a gay rights advocate!
My brother, sister and cousins are still not so comfortable with my orientation, but I don't give a fuck anymore!
Odd that the younger generation is so much less open.
I think most parents have dreams for their children. Often a life mirroring their own if not a better version of it. That is the path they know. That's what brought them happiness.
So when that child tells them that they are walking a different path, it's a bit of a shock. The picture in their mind of their children shatters.
A part of them mourns for the death of that dream. They have to work through the seven stages of grief to do that.
I don't know for sure if the father in the above story was simply grieving or homophobic. But I think it's important to recognize that parents go through a process of "coming out" as well.
So when that child tells them that they are walking a different path, it's a bit of a shock. The picture in their mind of their children shatters.
A part of them mourns for the death of that dream. They have to work through the seven stages of grief to do that.
I don't know for sure if the father in the above story was simply grieving or homophobic. But I think it's important to recognize that parents go through a process of "coming out" as well.
