So I recently bought a dildo, 6” and not terribly thick, but definitely bigger than my tight hole. I have never had a dick in me or a dildo. The only thing I’ve had is a fairly small butt plug and a prostate massager but it was also small. I am very nervous about it and was looking for any advice. I know go slow and use lots of lube but I am scared after the initial pain I will back out and be too scared of the pain. Also, is there any damage that I can do? I hear horror stories about people having to go to the emergency room for playing with toys. Mine cannot get stuck in me as it has balls and a suction cup. Any and all advice is welcome. Thanks! I’m nervously excited
Dildo Question
- Thread starter ninjanate
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Hmmmm, I'm afraid I am a newbie on dildos, but from my experience with dicks: Make it calmly and slowly. Your hole, in time, will accomodate and expand as you insert the dildo deeper.
You may feel pain, of course, but you don't need to ignore. Just keep going according to your comfort and resistance.
You may feel pain, of course, but you don't need to ignore. Just keep going according to your comfort and resistance.
There's a bunch of threads here about dildos, butt plugs, and stretching. See for example:
Best toys to start bottoming?
Best toys to start bottoming?
Experiment! Just be sure the lube you are using is compatible with the toy you are using it for. Petroleum and oil based are a no-no for latex, and silicone is bad for silicone toys (liquid silicone breaks down solid silicone). Water based is the general go-to for all toy play, but there are options out there.
J-lube (it's wild stuff) is a great one because you mix it from powder so you get to choose the consistency, and it's way more slippery than silicone.
For toys, I always go for water-based. Personally I find that some water-based lubes have ingredients that, when using them for ass play can cause a burning or irritation inside my ass. The only lube I've found that doesn't do that is Astroglide gel. Easily available on Amazon for cheap, also found at lots of stores.
For play with others, I look for "hybrid" lubes -- a mix of water and silicone-based lube. It stays slick longer (the silicone) but cleans up easier (the water). Sliquid, Pjur and System JO are all good ones I've used. Pjur is expensive but great, System JO is also really good.
If I'm in a wet environment, I'll go with straight silicone-based as it is nearly impossible to wash off without soap. I like a brand called 9x7, but Swiss Navy is good too. Astroglide makes a good stuff too that's readily available many places. If you find that you prefer silicone-based, look for a good body wash designed to help with silicone lube removal. Wet makes one, as do a few others. A few drops of that cleaner, lather it in your hands, apply it where you need it, let it sit for 20 seconds, rinse, and you're clean as a whistle. Regular soaps and shower gels take much longer to get you clean.
For play with others, I look for "hybrid" lubes -- a mix of water and silicone-based lube. It stays slick longer (the silicone) but cleans up easier (the water). Sliquid, Pjur and System JO are all good ones I've used. Pjur is expensive but great, System JO is also really good.
If I'm in a wet environment, I'll go with straight silicone-based as it is nearly impossible to wash off without soap. I like a brand called 9x7, but Swiss Navy is good too. Astroglide makes a good stuff too that's readily available many places. If you find that you prefer silicone-based, look for a good body wash designed to help with silicone lube removal. Wet makes one, as do a few others. A few drops of that cleaner, lather it in your hands, apply it where you need it, let it sit for 20 seconds, rinse, and you're clean as a whistle. Regular soaps and shower gels take much longer to get you clean.
chrisrobin
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All god answers on lubes, so, take your pick and lube up your dildo. For the first few times make sure you are in a position that's comfortable and where you can have control over the depth of penetration you are getting. Relax, don't hurry, a little bit at a time, and sometimes it's not a bad idea for a really tight hole to have a rest day and then start again but you'll find it's like a memory foam mattress, it will remember what it's done before. I was sent a big dildo for my birthday and so eagerly I lube my hole, lubed this fine cock and started. Half an hour later I achieved total balls deep - along with a sweaty brow and lots of perseverance. My buddy who sent me the dildo rang and asked how I was going and roared with laughter when I told him is was up and had taken half an hour - it took me four days!
I began small and worked my way up, or should I say cocks worked their way up!
I began small and worked my way up, or should I say cocks worked their way up!
@ninjanate - You can also get sets of dildos that are sold together and are like 3 different sizes to work your way up.
Treat yourself like you would treat a lover. Plenty of lube, go slow and easy and be patient. Later, if you want, yiu can hammer your hole like you are roofing a house. Now is not that moment.
Also, maybe, to keep possible stains off your sheets, from any number of things, use an old fitted sheet if you have one.
Also, maybe, to keep possible stains off your sheets, from any number of things, use an old fitted sheet if you have one.
I recently got back into anal play and bought a dildo because I missed the feeling of being penetrated. You mention the pain several times. They key is to find pleasure in the pain. Not in an S&M kind of way. Instead of "the pain" think instead of opening you body to a man (someone you may fantasize about). Feel him open you up and relax as you let him in. Put pressure on the dildo and stick with it. You'll be glad you did.
Great suggestions on lube. Start with your fingers and then your small plug. Then start with the dildo. You’ll get it. Enjoy the ride!!
Here are 3 different pages with explanations and accompanying cautions:
Poppers | FRANK
Poppers
From Heart Medicine to Party Drug: A Brief History of Poppers
JJREAGAN
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The length is not as important as the thickness. I also used a butt plug at first to help me get used to the feeling of having something up there. The more slender the tip is the easier it will be to get it started and break through the anal sphincter muscle.
Once you do that a few times, you’ll be able to graduate to thicker dildos.
Lots of good advice here. I started in the shower using my fingers in the beginning and progressed to lube. My first dildo was about 6” and around 4” in girth. Lots of lube is a must. Once you feel comfortable, or somewhat, start with the small dildo or toy and go slow. Listen to your body. I’ve progressed to a 6” 5” girth dildo and achieved full entry. I can’t really describe the feeling. All I know is I felt gratified and wanted it deeper not harder. Happy landings!
