Embarrassing stories?
- Thread starter Lifeisgood703
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My grandma walked in on me once. Nothing registered on her face as she put my laundry away. I thought "Holy shit, she didn't even notice! Fuckin sweet!"
Oh she noticed, alright.. She told everyone that would fuckin' listen to her.
Sad, sad days for ol young dport. Lolz
Oh she noticed, alright.. She told everyone that would fuckin' listen to her.
Sad, sad days for ol young dport. Lolz
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I got caught in my hotel room bathroom by maid service.
Uh.. That I was riding a motorcycle. The fuck are we talking about in this thread?
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Um my grandma told people that I ride a motorcycle because I do. I mean why would she just walk in like nothing is going on and tell everyone what she saw?
My first job I cleaned a bakery kitchen after hours. The bleach was stored in the basement. One day while getting a bottle, I glanced up and spotted what turned out to be a collection of porn. It was those newspaper format rags. Anyway, next time down for a bottle, the store was empty, and I decided to make use of this treasure trove. Mid wank I heard a noise upstairs, and quickly put myself away. The owner was right at the top of the stairs.
From where he stood my lower half might have been visible, and I never knew if or what he saw. He called down asking what I was doing down there. "Getting bleach", I stammered, and red-faced I came upstairs hoping to avoid any further embarrassment. He never said anything, nothing seemed different in the days following, so I either didn't really get caught or the owner was just cool enough to know men will be men.
Either way, the lesson learned early was, "don't jerk off at work".
From where he stood my lower half might have been visible, and I never knew if or what he saw. He called down asking what I was doing down there. "Getting bleach", I stammered, and red-faced I came upstairs hoping to avoid any further embarrassment. He never said anything, nothing seemed different in the days following, so I either didn't really get caught or the owner was just cool enough to know men will be men.
Either way, the lesson learned early was, "don't jerk off at work".
I bet Louis C.K. has a few embarrassing masturbation stories to tell..........
Last year of high school. 18-19 years old.
I left the class and went to the restroom, a big and tall room with 8 stalls, 4 in each side. I was beneath one of the big windows, jerking quietly because there was a monitor outside. While cumming I looked up and saw through the window a repairman working on the roof of the school, and looking at me.
Well, what could I do now? I would look silly if I started to run, so I just let the last drops of cum to come out, put my pants back on, and left.
Never saw him again
I left the class and went to the restroom, a big and tall room with 8 stalls, 4 in each side. I was beneath one of the big windows, jerking quietly because there was a monitor outside. While cumming I looked up and saw through the window a repairman working on the roof of the school, and looking at me.
Well, what could I do now? I would look silly if I started to run, so I just let the last drops of cum to come out, put my pants back on, and left.
Never saw him again
Tony56
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It was the summer between 11th and 12th grade. The family went to Florida for a few days vacation. My brother and I shared one of those rooms that had an adjoining door between the rooms with my parents room.
We came up from having breakfast at the hotel restaurant and everyone was changing to go down to the pool. I lingered until everyone had left and lay down on my bed, on top of the bedspread, and started masturbating. Since I had been changing for the pool I was naked.
I was going at it pretty fast because I knew I did not have much time. All of a sudden the door between the rooms opens up and my dad walks in (dad never knocked on doors). Since I was lying on top of the bedspread there was no way to cover up. And I was about 5 seconds away from blast off when my dad walked in and I couldn't stop it. Shot all over my hairy belly and chest.
Dad was cool. Just told me to clean up quickly and come down to the pool.
We came up from having breakfast at the hotel restaurant and everyone was changing to go down to the pool. I lingered until everyone had left and lay down on my bed, on top of the bedspread, and started masturbating. Since I had been changing for the pool I was naked.
I was going at it pretty fast because I knew I did not have much time. All of a sudden the door between the rooms opens up and my dad walks in (dad never knocked on doors). Since I was lying on top of the bedspread there was no way to cover up. And I was about 5 seconds away from blast off when my dad walked in and I couldn't stop it. Shot all over my hairy belly and chest.
Dad was cool. Just told me to clean up quickly and come down to the pool.
After a party I spent the night at my friend's house.
As it happens sometimes with me during the transition between sleeping and being awake, and being aroused, I was grabbing my morning wood inside my underwear. When I got aware of what I was happening I thought he was sleeping, so I continued.
The thing is, when I opened my eyes my friend was gone, his sister was at the door, and the my dick's head was poking out of the underwear.
I was shocked, and while I was trying to find words to say I'm sorry, she just said:
'My mother asked me to wake you up and tell you that breakfast is ready downstairs.'
'Ok.'
Then she left
As it happens sometimes with me during the transition between sleeping and being awake, and being aroused, I was grabbing my morning wood inside my underwear. When I got aware of what I was happening I thought he was sleeping, so I continued.
The thing is, when I opened my eyes my friend was gone, his sister was at the door, and the my dick's head was poking out of the underwear.
I was shocked, and while I was trying to find words to say I'm sorry, she just said:
'My mother asked me to wake you up and tell you that breakfast is ready downstairs.'
'Ok.'
Then she left
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My roommates and I were really clean for college guys (one guy had major OCD and cleaned constantly), so our landlord liked to use our apartment as the model when giving prospective renters a tour. She would usually call us and let us know she was bringing someone by. One day I got home from class and my roommates were out, so I started stroking it in my bedroom. I didn’t check the answering machine and missed the landlord’s message.
A few minutes into my session I heard footsteps in the hall then my bedroom door popped open and my landlord came in my room. She was just trying to make sure the place was ready to show before the possible renters showed up. Her jaw hit the floor when she saw what was going on and she turned around and left quickly. I got dressed and apologized. The three girls that were interested in renting a place then showed up and toured our apartment. One of them was in 2 of my classes, I was glad she wasn’t there with the landlady on her first inspection of the property.
A couple weeks later the landlord asked my girlfriend, now wife, which of us she was dating. She said Tomand the landlord smiled really big and said “oh nice”. I took that as a compliment.
A few minutes into my session I heard footsteps in the hall then my bedroom door popped open and my landlord came in my room. She was just trying to make sure the place was ready to show before the possible renters showed up. Her jaw hit the floor when she saw what was going on and she turned around and left quickly. I got dressed and apologized. The three girls that were interested in renting a place then showed up and toured our apartment. One of them was in 2 of my classes, I was glad she wasn’t there with the landlady on her first inspection of the property.
A couple weeks later the landlord asked my girlfriend, now wife, which of us she was dating. She said Tomand the landlord smiled really big and said “oh nice”. I took that as a compliment.
- Heat,
Was jacking in the bathroom at my gf's house. I had forgotten to lock the door ... and in walked her dad. He looked at "IT", kind of shook his head a bit as he paused, then casually turned and exited. I told my gf and I could tell it turned her on -- she gave me a great blowjob and then we fucked...and she was a great fuck. Geezus. We've messaged on FB a few times and we both know we need to fuck again... anywho, I always wondered what her Dad's "look" meant. He might have been a bit pervy.
Caught by my smokin' hot cousin -- she was in college........ She saw "it", apologized for barging into my bedroom, and left. I finished unloading, then went out to join everyone at the reunion. She gave me a lot of extra attention. If we had had anytime alone I'm not sure what would have happened.
Caught by my roomie in college. He ended up joining me. Really. He saw me, walked on into the room, and said, "I need to do that, too." This guy had a major fucking horsedick...I remember it well. I'm pretty sure he was bi, but he was kind of a hillbilly and hot in that kind of hillbilly weird way some of them are. He loved to walk around our room naked or semi-naked with his huge cock swinging and he often commented on mine...which was kind of sexy.
Caught by my smokin' hot cousin -- she was in college........ She saw "it", apologized for barging into my bedroom, and left. I finished unloading, then went out to join everyone at the reunion. She gave me a lot of extra attention. If we had had anytime alone I'm not sure what would have happened.
Caught by my roomie in college. He ended up joining me. Really. He saw me, walked on into the room, and said, "I need to do that, too." This guy had a major fucking horsedick...I remember it well. I'm pretty sure he was bi, but he was kind of a hillbilly and hot in that kind of hillbilly weird way some of them are. He loved to walk around our room naked or semi-naked with his huge cock swinging and he often commented on mine...which was kind of sexy.
Tony56
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Same thing happened with me and my roommate. It makes life easier if you can freely jerk off your own room.
- Heat,
One more -- can't believe I forgot this one as it is the most recent:
I own a very successful and high profile small business. My professional life is also well documented in publications and sometimes on TV. Anywho -- I was work early one morning this past summer and went to use the john. It was going to be an hour before anyone else showed up. Or so I thought.
My business is on two floors, but the bathroom is on the first floor, and ... well, I'm horny that morning and so I'm on the john watching porn on my phone -- some serious sexy fuck scenes -- and jacking my meat. I'm having a grand ol' time and then out of the corner of my eye I see a shadow and I look up and there's a guy standing in the doorway. Not just any guy. A very hot guy -- 6'2", built and handsome you know he's a hot fuck -- and to boot -- he had been into my business the day before!!! and was back to look at the item!! When I had waited on him the day before all I could think was, "Jesus, I'd like to get naked with you..."
Anywho -- He didn't know we weren't open yet because, well, I had forgotten to lock the door behind me when I came to work. He had come in, didn't find anyone but heard my phone in the back...and now here he was, watching me stroke my cock as my balls slapped my thigh.
So -- I'm jacking, I see him, and I said, "Holy shit!" and kind of tried to cover myself/stand up/pull up my pants -- and he just stands there. I am about to tuck my cock in my pants and because it's still somewhat hard it's difficult and apologizing like crazy -- and then, then... as if someone had cast me in a porn movie, the guy comes over, strokes my cock, we start kissing and necking...and I reach down to find one helluva a big cock on him, too...I unzipped him ...and we both dropped trousers...kept kissing...jacking...and then he got on his knees...went straight for my balls, which drives me crazy. Long story longer -- I locked the bathroom door and we had some of the hottest sex you could imagine. It was one of those "magic moments."
And yeah -- he bought the "item" he was interested in. He came back with his wife to pick it up. Which made the whole thing even hotter.
I own a very successful and high profile small business. My professional life is also well documented in publications and sometimes on TV. Anywho -- I was work early one morning this past summer and went to use the john. It was going to be an hour before anyone else showed up. Or so I thought.
My business is on two floors, but the bathroom is on the first floor, and ... well, I'm horny that morning and so I'm on the john watching porn on my phone -- some serious sexy fuck scenes -- and jacking my meat. I'm having a grand ol' time and then out of the corner of my eye I see a shadow and I look up and there's a guy standing in the doorway. Not just any guy. A very hot guy -- 6'2", built and handsome you know he's a hot fuck -- and to boot -- he had been into my business the day before!!! and was back to look at the item!! When I had waited on him the day before all I could think was, "Jesus, I'd like to get naked with you..."
Anywho -- He didn't know we weren't open yet because, well, I had forgotten to lock the door behind me when I came to work. He had come in, didn't find anyone but heard my phone in the back...and now here he was, watching me stroke my cock as my balls slapped my thigh.
So -- I'm jacking, I see him, and I said, "Holy shit!" and kind of tried to cover myself/stand up/pull up my pants -- and he just stands there. I am about to tuck my cock in my pants and because it's still somewhat hard it's difficult and apologizing like crazy -- and then, then... as if someone had cast me in a porn movie, the guy comes over, strokes my cock, we start kissing and necking...and I reach down to find one helluva a big cock on him, too...I unzipped him ...and we both dropped trousers...kept kissing...jacking...and then he got on his knees...went straight for my balls, which drives me crazy. Long story longer -- I locked the bathroom door and we had some of the hottest sex you could imagine. It was one of those "magic moments."
And yeah -- he bought the "item" he was interested in. He came back with his wife to pick it up. Which made the whole thing even hotter.
twinkish92
Legendary Member
I was caught in my car by a guy walking by checking out my BMW. Was awkward, but he took a Lang good look down at my dick before he stormed of.
At.your.cervix
Superior Member
My junior year at college I shared a dilapidated old house with two other guys and a girl, Angie. One afternoon I came home and nobody else was there, and I went into my room and started to beat off. About 10 minutes after I had gotten going Angie opened my door with some mail in her hand; she just stared at the big swollen cock in my hands for a couple of seconds and then said "sorry" and closed the door again. We wound up fucking for the first time together that evening.
