Great Comebacks To Bad Pickup Lines

Discussion in 'Funny Stuff: Jokes, Quizzes, Games & Pics' started by jakeatolla, Mar 16, 2009.

  1. jakeatolla

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    Man : “Haven’t we met before?”
    Woman : “Yes, I’m the receptionist at the VD Clinic.”

    Man : “Haven’t I seen you someplace before?
    Woman : “Yeah, that’s why I don’t go there anymore.”

    Man : “Is this seat empty?”
    Woman : “Yes, and this one will be too if you sit down.”

    Man : “So, wanna go back to my place ?”
    Woman : “Well, I don’t know. Will two people fit under a rock?”

    Man : “Your place or mine?”
    Woman : “Both. You go to yours and I’ll go to mine.”

    Man : “I’d like to call you. What’s your number?”
    Woman : “It’s in the phone book.”

    Man : “But I don’t know your name.”
    Woman : “That’s in the phone book too.”

    Man : “So what do you do for a living?”
    Woman : “I’m a female impersonator.”

    Man : “What sign were you born under?”
    Woman : “No Parking.”

    Man : “Hey, baby, what’s your sign?”
    Woman : “Do not Enter”

    Man : “How do you like your eggs in the morning?”
    Woman : “Unfertilized”

    Man : “Hey, come on, we’re both here at this bar for the same reason”
    Woman : “Yeah! Let’s pick up some chicks!”

    Man : “I’m here to fulfil your every sexual fantasy.”
    Woman : “You mean you’ve got both a donkey and a Great Dane?”

    Man : “I know how to please a Woman :
    Woman : “Then please leave me alone.”

    Man : “I want to give myself to you.”
    Woman : “Sorry, I don’t accept cheap gifts.”

    Man : “I can tell that you want me.”
    Woman : “Ohhhh. You’re so right. I want you to leave.”

    Man : “If I could see you naked, I’d die happy
    Woman : “Yeah, but if I saw you naked, I’d probably die laughing.”

    Man : “Hey cutie, how ’bout you and I hitting the hot spots?”
    Woman : “Sorry, I don’t date outside my species..”

    Man : “Your body is like a temple.”
    Woman : “Sorry, there are no services today.”

    Man : “I’d go through anything for you.”
    Woman : “Good! Let’s start with your bank account.”

    Man : “I would go to the end of the world for you.”
    Woman : “Yes, but would you stay there?
     
  2. hud01

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    :biggrin1:
     
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