Hair Shaming

[jjsjr]

I know how much women talk about "fat-shaming," but can we please talk about the unspoken reality of "hair-shaming" ???

Society gets uncomfortable around baldness, body hair, and grey hair. If we accepted who we are as human primates with genetic predispositions for certain characteristics, we wouldn't need Rogaine, Feria or Veet. It's one thing that the fashion world has certainly embraced the way we treat hair as something cute and trendworthy... but to glorify a head full of healthy dark hair is to scorn baldness and greyness. Also, I understand and respect the variations of personal preferences, but there's still a master umbrella societal opinion reigning down on us all. Look at how we view unibrows, back hair, even the way we style hair.... the examples are all over when you start to really examine it.

Why should men feel embarrassed for going bald, when it is an immutable genetic event? Why is body hair considered gross to so many people? Why must women shave their legs at all? Culturally, we respect hair, and I understand that.... but we have some pretty weird rules for how/where it ought to be treated. So yeah... I just coined the term "hair-shaming." You're welcome.

This is me being the devil's advocate.... but, as a whole, it's a reality that is often overlooked and rarely questioned. Hence this discussion.


Thoughts?
Thanks.

 

[GeorgeTSLC]

Not wholly immutable--you could get yourself castrated, or otherwise suppress your testosterone, so the relevant genes never manifest.

No, I don't advocate that insane course!

But seriously, folks: I've long said that if normal were really the ideal we aimed at, there would be products remedying abnormal failure to bald.

 

[long_uncut]

Good subject. Hope to see some comments.

 

[Playmate949]

Society gets uncomfortable around baldness, body hair, and grey hair.

I disagree with your premise.

 

[jjsjr]

I disagree with your premise.

Hence the reasoning for discussion.

 

[erratic]

Society gets uncomfortable around baldness, body hair, and grey hair. If we accepted who we are as human primates with genetic predispositions for certain characteristics, we wouldn't need Rogaine, Feria or Veet.

Agreed. 100%. In particular, the displays of disgust and revulsion that I see in response to body hair, in media and in real life, are just hideous.

 

[Silvertip]

I've been substantially gray since my forties, now nearly all white, and I've never experienced anything but complements about my hair. Yes, the folks who manufacture and market hair dye try to intimate that there is something wrong with graying but I've never encountered that attitude in real life.

 

[Exbiker]

Hmm.

Do you remember "Venn" diagrams at school? Circles to show overlapping categories... a basic introduction to axiomatic set theory? Well, it's like that ...

I often shave or clip my head hair; I'm quite thin on top at 48, and that's been pretty much the case since I was 28... so I prefer fully bald rather than half bald. That's partly to do with taking control...

Some months I also shave my body- chest, stomach, legs ... particularly when my gym work is going well...

My balls and butt are usually shaved...

But sometimes I let my body hair stay... it's growing back at the moment.

Hair has all kinds of association - age, gender, cultures and subcultures. Views about social class. Masculinity. Sport. Modernity and tradition.

Its ALL ok. No matter what people want to do, or not do.

We are all free.

But you are very right to question the way that commercial interests seek to undermine everyone's confidence. And the way a lot of us take that on board... it is all a casserole of nonsense.

:smile:

 

[robbiesundies]

I love my gray and black hair. I hear great things, I used to dye it and even frost the tips..now I just keep it the way it is. For my age..who do I need to impress..I accept myself just the way I am. Imperfections and all...:}

 

[jjsjr]

A product like Rogaine exists because we were "taught" to be afraid of going bald.
Half its campaign is designed to foster that fear.

 

[rob_]

I completely agree with the OP.

In my experience, I am constantly dealing with "bald-shaming".
I remember talking with my roommate about some guys that we met at a party, and trying to set her up with one of them. One of her objections was "ew, he's like balding". There was no ill intent towards me, but it has definitely stayed with me in a negative way. I hear comments reflecting these attitudes all the time.

Another more malicious comment I've received was from an empty profile on Grindr: "What's worse, being fat or bald?"
I understand this person was trolling and purely trying to get a rise out of me, which didn't work.

I'm confident in my baldness, most of the time.
Although when the rest of the world is chastising men for growing man buns, I would cut off an arm to have one myself.

 

[injoyinit]

The surprising thing is most men that can grow hair on their heads shave it all off, or at least trim it very very short. The ones that can't grow hair lament that they can't ...It seems the grass is always greener on the other side of the fence

 

[boatnik]

I remember that I felt embarrassed when I started balding, but I was never shamed for it. Since I didn't like the balding look, I decided to shave my head and have kept it shaved for many years. I always get compliments on my looks so I guess it works, but sometimes when I see a guy with a great hair style I think, "Wish I could do that."

 

[Otep]

Most "hair shaming" isn't really hair shaming primarily. It's a secondary effect of ageism and misogyny/adherence to traditional gender roles. Grey and balding are both signs of age which is why people view them negatively. When guys start to go grey while also looking very young they'll likely face less scrutiny than someone who starts going grey at an older age. Plus, if you're really attractive, despite your older age, then you're just a "silver fox" which is a positive.

With women, long hair and no body hair has been associated with femininity for a long time. As such, someone who doesn't adhere to that is going against traditional gender norms which is the primary driving force behind the "hair shaming". Guys have more flexibility when it comes to body hair and masculinity (because...males) however it's incredibly common for someone to chime in and complain about a guy who shaves off his pubes claiming that it doesn't look manly or masculine.

Overall, when it comes to males and body hair, I don't think there is much room for complaint. Yes, there are plenty of people who prefer no body hair or trimmed body hair on males but there are also tons of people who love body hair on guys. As either scenario, smooth or hairy, occurs naturally it's not surprising that people will find attraction in one over the other. People are not required to like body hair and I don't think hairy guys are faced with a shortage of people who are accepting of it.

 

[jjsjr]

I'm trying this "new thing" where I'm not shaving or trimming anything shoulders down. I want to see my body 100% in its natural state. I'm at the stage where I would have trimmed like a week ago or more. Its' been a weird challenge to really embrace my body fully for what it is.