Help With Roomie!

jellybeanofevil

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Hi hope everyone is doing well!

I'm going to be super straight forward, I just moved in with a new housemate and I feel sexually attracted to him. I know he's straight so I wouldn't initiate anything that would make him uncomfortable. Having said that... He seems fairly open minded, I know we're both really horny and we spend a fair amount of time together at the apt. Any idea how I could initiate something that would lead to us jerking off together or something like that without making it totally weird? I also want to explore my sexuality more but I don't wanna make it super awkward. HELP!
 

socalfreak

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You just moved in with him.
You know he's straight.
You don't want to make him uncomfortable.
You don't want to initiate anything.

But... You want to get him to masturbate with you, because he turns you on.

There is absolutely nothing in your post that would lead one to think that's a good idea.
"I know we're horny a lot"...
Yeah?... How can you know what he's feeling? Unless he tells you, you don't.
Also.... Being horny all the time pretty much comes with the territory of being a healthy male.

There may or may not be more info about this scene.
But, based on what you've shared,... Don't.
Leave it as a fantasy.
Roommates and coworkers are always a bad idea.
Unless you're prepared to go apartment hunting very soon & living in an awkward situation at home until something becomes available, let it go.
Unless he has very clearly and expressly states that he is willing to participate in sexually intimate activity with another male, forget it.
 

godard

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I agree with socalfreak. Think of it this way: if you initiate something, what would you really gain vs. what do you risk losing? I wouldn't even recommend initiating something if he was gay. The fact that he identifies as straight makes it a no-brainer. Don't drive yourself crazy over this. It's understandable that you are horny (aren't we all?)--but take a few steps back and think twice before you go any further.
 

jellybeanofevil

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thanks for the responses! Yeah I dont wanna make him uncomfortable! I guess when you read it, it does sound like im trying to get in his pants or something. I guess I was thinking more of a jerk off together like in college sort of situation (I kinda never had the chance to explore that) but that makes sense. I guess just trying to make some sort of sexual/comradery connection with another dude.
 
D

deleted5199391

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Lol probably I am not the right guy to give advices on this topic :D
To me happened twice to do something with a roomate. Once was a one shot situation, we never talked after about that. The other time we fucked for the time he spent with me in Italy.
But things happened, I didn't force stuffs.
 

Boiworld

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I think you need to tell us more about your roommate and yourself and the setting of the apartment or house you're in.

Do you each have your own bedroom? Shared bathroom?
Do you know where he jerks off?
Where do you jerk off?

You only mentioned you're both horny, why do you say that? How do you know he is? Did he tell you that? What do you guys talk about when you talk to each other?

You need to tell us more!!!
 
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jellybeanofevil

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we have separate bathrooms and rooms so yeah no idea where he jo. We spend a lot of time together in the common areas though (kitchen, living room, etc) he is a very reserved person but he is opening up to me slowly, I constantly see him using dating apps but never meeting with anybody, constantly stressed/anxious and maybe even bitter? not in a bad way he just seems very sexually frustrated. We haven't talked about sex/sexuality much but he is very open minded and I don't think he sees gay as wrong or anything like that. Maybe I should bring up that topic first and see how he reacts? How could I do that without making it weird though?
 

kudoz

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If he's as sexually frustrated as you think he is then even if you did end up jacking off or more then it's likely that after that there might be a bit more difficulty. Take care. And if he initiates something make sure you can deal with an aftermath which he can't cope with. I get how sexually aroused he makes you and how horny you are - me too, but just take care with straight guys in a situation like this.
 

404goldie

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Part of being a grown-up is learning to control yourself. And learning how to be a good friend. That means accepting him for who he is, he may very well have NO desires to mess around with a guy. Focus on being a friend and a good, respectful roommate. How would you like it if a female roommate made innuendoes that she wanted to fool around with you? He knows you are gay so if he wants to do anything he’ll let you know. Remember that being roommates is foremost a business relationship. Respect boundaries. Don’t parade around naked. Put the sexual attraction to the side.
 

dreamer20

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we have separate bathrooms and rooms so yeah no idea where he jo. We spend a lot of time together in the common areas though (kitchen, living room, etc) he is a very reserved person but he is opening up to me slowly, I constantly see him using dating apps but never meeting with anybody, constantly stressed/anxious and maybe even bitter? not in a bad way he just seems very sexually frustrated. We haven't talked about sex/sexuality much but he is very open minded and I don't think he sees gay as wrong or anything like that. Maybe I should bring up that topic first and see how he reacts? How could I do that without making it weird though?

I assume he already knows you are gay. You instinctively felt you should not broach the subject of masterbating together with him - so don't do it. Do your sexplorations with someone else. What he needs now is a sympathetic, listening, encouraging, supportive friend. If you will, please find out why he becomes bitter, stressed and angry. Is his failure to get dates causing these emotions? Is he contemplating suicide? You can let him know he is <insert positive attributes here> and shouldn't give up hope in finding a relationship.
 

jellybeanofevil

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Hey dreamer! I really liked your response, and thanks everyone else for being understanding. You're right, the best thing I can do is being supportive and a good friend, I do find him very attractive but as 404goldie said I need to learn how to control my instincts. I'm not sure what is going on with him at the moment but whatever it is has some tones of sadness/depression/anxiety so the best thing I can be is just a good friend to him! Hopefully I'll make a positive impact in his life (in whatever way that might be)
 

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Does he know that you are gay? If he doesn't know then the chances of anything happening are probably less than 1%.
 

HOU_HEADHUNTER

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Don't force anything. If something should happen let it happen naturally and preferably on his terms if he should be open to it. He might turn out to be a good friend and you don't want to ruin that. I have a lot of straight friends that I would never try anything with and I enjoy our friendship so much more than a sexual tryst that might end the friendship.