Help

[bicurousguy18]

When I was about 15 i started searching the web to view men to see how i measured up and ever since then I have watched gay porn. I have strong, thats an understatement, feelings for this one guy at school, i am 18 now, but he is the only guy i have ever had feelings for and the only one they i am attracted to. I wake up every morning thinking about him. I would love to have an experience with him, he says he is strait but there have been subtle hints that he would be up for an experience, although i am not sure how to ask him and i don't want to lose him as a friend.... wow i have really got off subject... the question i wanted to ask is ... ever since i have been masturbating to gay porn i feel guilty afterwards... if someone asked me if i was gay or strait i believe i would say that i was strait, i have convinced myself that the reason i watch gay porn is because i what the body that they have, lean muscular and well tanned, but after reading what i have written i think i am gay.... help....on anything in this post of jumbled thoughts. :redface:

 

[RU8plusinNE?]

I feel guilty looking at and thinking about big cocks all the time. I do suck cock once in awhile but am not gay. I love everything about women and only have a great apprechiation for the huge cock, why not indulge both loves?

 

[bicurousguy18]

i have never sucked a cock, but the thought of cum in my mouth discuses me.... maybe its just because i havent tried it yet

 

[D_Geffarde Phartsmeller]

When I was about 15 i started searching the web to view men to see how i measured up and ever since then I have watched gay porn. I have strong, thats an understatement, feelings for this one guy at school, i am 18 now, but he is the only guy i have ever had feelings for and the only one they i am attracted to. I wake up every morning thinking about him. I would love to have an experience with him, he says he is strait but there have been subtle hints that he would be up for an experience, although i am not sure how to ask him and i don't want to lose him as a friend.... wow i have really got off subject... the question i wanted to ask is ... ever since i have been masturbating to gay porn i feel guilty afterwards... if someone asked me if i was gay or strait i believe i would say that i was strait, i have convinced myself that the reason i watch gay porn is because i what the body that they have, lean muscular and well tanned, but after reading what i have written i think i am gay.... help....on anything in this post of jumbled thoughts. :redface:

There's actually a condition in which you get-off watching other guys/girls but only because you want what they have (lean body, muscular, tanned, etc.). Alot of it ties to how you view yourself. If you think poorly of yourself for whatever reason, you may idolize another person for having the traits you lack. Sex is often the conduit with which we express this desire because it's literally and emotionally the closest you can get to someone. You don't necessarily want to have sex with them, you just want to BE them.

Of course I could be completely wrong. I don't have alot to work with hah. Either way, don't fret! With patience, I'm sure you'll figure it out

 

[Whopper-lee]

Thinking and doing also can make it so.
WHO ARE YOU!
DEFINE YOUR SELF AS A PERSON 1st. and THE SEX ORENT. (bi,gay, S8, whatever) WILL FOLLOW, IF YOU ARE HONEST WITH YOU AND YOUR SOUL.
The biggest male organ is actually the brain...use it!
I'm sure the values to your life is more than a j/o gay pron.
Stop cheating yourself ...my southern brotha (ALABAM) Damn!
Grow some cotton on this (smile) Just my S8 thoughts comin out
Love U dude..thx for sharing a thread (wink-smile)

 

[chavous]

Honey Relax You Are 18 And Just Starting To Explore And Grow. What I Would Say Is Shed The Guilt. Life Is Wonderful Full Of All Kind Of Experiences So Chill And Enjoy! Just Be Safe. Ifelt Guilty Years Ago And Aloud It To Keep Me From Doing Some Things That I Now Regret Not Doing. Better To Regret Something You Lived--- Than Not Living!

 

[bicurousguy18]

Thanks guys...
HugoB i think you hit what i was feeling best.. but i dont necessarily dislike my body i just know it could look better... which is why i started this week working out

 

[kurios]

HugoB bang on in fact I can see some of my 'want to be' in the past explained.

 

[ewa123]

Feel no guilt about loving and thinking about another man. Now, I definitely AM gay, and I remember feeling very guilty when I was still closeted and never really enjoyed the feeling of being close with another man - it was only when I fell for someone that I realized that it was crazy for me to ignore the feelings.

Now that I've been out awhile, it feels ridiculous that I even questioned my feelings or got so down on myself - it's about loving yourself and coming to terms with that you're perfectly fine and ok the way you are. And other people usually respond positively when they see someone so ok about themselves.

BTW - the experience you're describing - can't get the other guy out of your head - yeah, that's kinda what did it for me and when I started realizing...um...I think I'm gay. And one of the guys I fell for was totally cool when I finally told him how I felt even though he wasn't gay, and we're still friends today, so don't worry about losing a friend, just go for it. Try not to be hard on yourself - acceptance can sometimes take awhile, but when you get there, you will be profoundly glad you did. :banana: