lady's imput? (a PROBLEM with having a big cock...)

[blakobra8]

So, the girl I am currently with is wonderful. We fuck like rabbits, are very comfortable with each other etc.

We started sleeping together almost 6 months ago. The first few times, she would get on top of me and cum in a matter of minutes.

This is where the penis comes in: I say with pride that I am the biggest she's been with. That's great, except for that she can not get herself off by vaginal sex alone. When the clit is involved (either during intercourse, or going down on her, or whatever) she gets off no problem. But when it's just intercourse, she can't do it. She says I've rearranged her, which is nice, but it still irks me a little.

Thankfully she's an incredibly honest type who doesn't fake orgasms or lie to make me feel better. And thankfully I can still give her great orgasms with my mouth and fingers. I guess I would like to know if any other women have had the issue of big penises HINDERING their ability to have vaginal orgasms?


GAH!

Thanks in advance, ladies and gents.

 

[Tattooed Goddess]

Not sure if you noticed this or not.....

THE CLITORIS IS OUTSIDE OF THE VAGINA McFLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Some women don't have vaginal orgasms, i have no idea what they must feel like. Nothing on the planet compares to a clitoral orgasm. You see the clitoris glans under the hood is exactly what the head of your penis is. They are made out of the same nerves and tissue. So it would be like you wanting to orgasm from someone patting your back. If you aren't going to get near the head of the dick with some stimulation....you look like an idiot for rubbing some place else inches away from it expecting the same results.

Personally, out of the 34 trillion orgasms i've had in my lifetime, i've never even been able to orgasm from sex alone. Welcome to most women on the planet. About 80% of us actually.

Stop reading mostly bullshit bragadious stories on lpsg that make men think all women orgasm from big dick alone. It's tripe. If about 10-20% of women are capable of orgasming outside of the clitoris, then 80-90% of the male population is going to not share these kind of realisitc stories where their dick can't be the feature reason you see? Most guys don't want to admit that to other dudes. That's why we have a lot of liars around here.

Don't make her feel bad for that, nor should you feel bad about that. You need bigger fish to fry.

 

[blakobra8]

Thanks for the response, but 1. I know where the clitoris is, 2. She has had many vaginal orgasms through intercourse in the past. Granted, she was usually on top, so there may have been some clit-grinding action. Either way, I'm just relating what she's told me. The point is, of the hundred-and-something times we've had sex, she's had vaginal orgasms maybe the first 5. For some reason, the same stimulation (mostly, if not all internal) does not do it for her any more.

Apologies if I was unclear. Yes, I used to believe the internet Casanova's yelling about how their penises make women squirt cum out of their ears, but I like to think I have grown up a little since high school.

last minute edits: I learned the hard way the problems that can arise from guy's being insecure about their ability (and, to an extent, their inflated sense of responsibility) to "make" their partners cum. I realize nothing puts on the pressure like asking "did you cum???" every ten minutes. While I take a lot of pleasure in getting my girl off, I don't presume to know her body better than she does. So, maybe I can feel a bit "unmanly" occasionally when she doesn't cum just from fucking, but it's something I'm trying to get over.

 

[Tattooed Goddess]

To answer your question, i have a very difficult time even with clitoral stimulation to orgasm when his penis is inside me. It's just so girthy that my mind can't put my brain in both places at one time. I compare it to fucking your mouth with a baseball bat and have someone tickle your neck at the same time, chances are you wont be able to focus on anything but your mouth stretching out, ya know?

 

[blakobra8]

haha well put

 

[redbear52]

About half the woman I have had sex with have appeared to orgasm with vaginal intercourse alone but I accept the possibility that some may have been faking it.

My wife only rarely has an obvious orgasm with vaginal sex but claims she has "little orgasms" that feel different from those she always experiences with cunnilingus. When she does occasionally have an obvious orgasm with vaginal sex, it comes as a bit of a suprise to both of us.

I have had long-term relationships with 4 women who did orgasm from vaginal intercourse alone very consistently (nearly every time) whom I was sure were not faking. One of these women actually didn't like digital or oral clitoral manipulation at all. Each woman seemed to require a little different technique (position, rhythm, depth and angle of penetration) to reach orgasm. For one, Kegeling rhythmically during intercourse was a key. Another had to be on top controlling nearly all the movement. For another it was doggy style (etc).

For women, the entire emotional gestalt seems to be critical to reaching orgasm, at least with vaginal intercourse. It may be that the excitement that occurs early in a sexual relationship was enough to push the OP's girlfriend over the brink. I can well imagine that having a big cock inside of you could be a bit of a distraction for a woman who requires either direct or indirect clitoral stimulation to come. A guy who is too long to allow close pelvic bone contact, or who is boxing the gal's cervix quite a bit, may well be at a disadvantage when it comes to vaginal sex.

On the other hand, it is definitely true that some percentage of women (probably well under 50%) are vaginally orgasmic without any direct clitoral stimulation. One can argue that these women reach orgasm due to indirect stimulation of the clit rubbing against the guy's pubis, or through stimulation of the internal portion of the clitoris that lies in close proximity to the vaginal canal, or as a result of the guy's girth and thrusting tugging on the clitoral hood to cause indirect stimulation, but they can come without any direct clitoral contact.

I think we guys would be happier if every woman came every time from vaginal intercourse alone, but at least we can take comfort in the fact that most still like to be fucked even when they don't.

 

[HiddenLacey]

Ok, here's something you can try, depending on how long you are.

First of all I'm not sure how strong your girls stomach muscle are so it may work better with a pillow under her hips. Now If you are in missionary and she draws her knees up and spreads her legs she should be able to get very close to your pelvic area during intercourse. I can rock against my partner and get the added clit stimulation that way and pretty much always cum in less than 5 minutes and considering the fact its not constant stimulation its great. Nothing feels as good to me as an orgasm with a man inside me, thrusting while it happens. If I wrap my hands around the bars on the bed I can arch my hips up higher, get more stimulation and cum several times. Now when I'm done my stomach feels like I just did a million sit-ups but it's wonderful! So the trick is, you being close enough to her that she can slide against you, and her arching her hips up into you. I found this out completely by accident once time just by arching a certain way. It is the easiest way for me to orgasm during intercourse. While I know I have orgasmed without clitoras stimulation at the time of my orgasm, I have normally had some stimulation there before it happens.

 

[redbear52]

There is also the CAT (clitoral alignment technique) that has been described in various sex position guides. If the guy has enough length, he gets in missionary position, but then shifts his body up higher towards the woman's head and thrusts in a somewhat posterior direction, toward the back of the woman's vaginal canal but doesn't penetrate completely. The idea is to use a rocking motion such that the shaft of the penis near the base makes contact with the woman's clit.

I must admit, that I have never really gotten this to work as intended, but it seems worthwhile to try.

 

[D_JoeCockHer]

i make my girl have orgams with just vaginal sex, not all the time! We usually start off in foreplay and i sometimes stop just before she cums and fuck her so maybe this is why!! sometimes i massage her clit while fucking her too

 

[double_digit]

Purely anecdotal observation:

I did experience this with a long past lady-friend of mine. She was disposed to not having many orgasms IF ANY AT ALL until we tried this method. Otherwise, she would be dittling herself during penetration or I was "helping out" after I had withdrawn from her to coax her peak.

Orgasms to some people are *very* elusive things. But as in everything else? What have you got to loose for trying?

There is also the CAT (clitoral alignment technique) that has been described in various sex position guides.

 

[blakobra8]

hmm, an idea indeed.


goddamit now im super horny, thanks guys...

 

[TheRob]

To answer your question, i have a very difficult time even with clitoral stimulation to orgasm when his penis is inside me. It's just so girthy that my mind can't put my brain in both places at one time. I compare it to fucking your mouth with a baseball bat and have someone tickle your neck at the same time, chances are you wont be able to focus on anything but your mouth stretching out, ya know?

if you are ever single I'll be happy towork on it with you

 

[D_Rosalind Mussell]

I am like MR, where I can't orgasm when a male is so girthy. What I've experienced is that I can feel my vaginal muscles want to contract but they just can't because there's no room. I still enjoyed the sex immensely, but we just made a few adjustments in the orgasm department, that's all. It sounds like you have a good sex relationship, so good luck!

 

[Tattooed Goddess]

I am like MR, where I can't orgasm when a male is so girthy. What I've experienced is that I can feel my vaginal muscles want to contract but they just can't because there's no room. I still enjoyed the sex immensely, but we just made a few adjustments in the orgasm department, that's all. It sounds like you have a good sex relationship, so good luck!

Exactly! I tried this again lastnight while we were having sex, I couldn't tighten the vagina muscles because they were so stretched out. It wasn't a pleasant sensation to try to tense up preparing for the orgasm. And when i was tightening up he couldnt move at all or else it would pull everything in and it was so painful. Wasn't worth it at all for me. I don't think i'll be doing that again any time soon.

 

[D_Rosalind Mussell]

Exactly! I tried this again lastnight while we were having sex, I couldn't tighten the vagina muscles because they were so stretched out. It wasn't a pleasant sensation to try to tense up preparing for the orgasm. And when i was tightening up he couldnt move at all or else it would pull everything in and it was so painful. Wasn't worth it at all for me. I don't think i'll be doing that again any time soon.

I've done that too! It hurt so much I thought I had damaged myself somehow. Thankfully that wasn't the case but damn it was painful.

 

[_average]

Well i guess im one of the lucky few then. My fiance cums like 3times at least when we have sex just through vaginal stimulation.... Im not extra long or girthy but she cums without clitoral stimulation. I do that for her when im finished. I just thought it was the norm but apparently not! Lol

 

[DieHard9x6]

Personally I've found that deep-penetration, grinding sex can definitely get a girl off during vaginal intercourse; of course, this IS clitoral stimulation, really. I can sympathize with the OP on this one - if a woman is not comfortable taking the entire length, then that pubic/clitoral grinding is hard to pull off, and this method of achieving orgasm is compromised.

Sometimes the "fit" just isn't perfect, and you need to try other things!