Liking a straight guy

[hnla394]

So, I have this problem at work....

I manage quite a few individuals at work, and I am pretty good at keeping work separate from pleasure, but there is this guy that is pretty new that popped on the scene. He is incredibly cute, super charming, and is super cool with everything.

He is one of those straight guys who is so friendly and charming that your brain plays tricks on you and says "Maybe he is into me". But he mentions he has a girlfriend and whatnot.

He allwayyysssss talks talks and talks with me. And I have become good friends with him. He invited me to go and climb a mountain with him... and I find myself developing a little crush on him!!!

I have to see him every day and talk with him for my job... uhhh how do I stop this madness??

 

[Lokopajero]

After see ur pics... I know why he invite u! Damnnnn u are HOT

 

[Lokopajero]

And don’t stop ! Maybe something happens

 

[Andrue]

The primary issue I see here is that it seems you're in some sort of supervisory position over him. That makes showing interest in your employees a bit of a problematic situation. So if that situation helps you quash this idea, then it's a good one to go with. If you're the boss, this could possibly backfire big time. If you're both employed by someone else, you (and he) could get your ass canned AND you could face legal consequences as his workplace superior. It could also be as simple as his co-workers getting pissed at the preferential treatment he'd get from you (real or imagined).

Run those ideas through your head and you may find your interest in this straight boy waning.

Now if you were only socially acquainted, I might suggest a different approach... and point out that there are bi guys who have girlfriends (hopefully well aware ones who are OK with their guy getting the man stuff elsewhere).

But that isn't the case here.

Another effective way of diminishing such interests is to develop an interest in someone else, preferably gay and someone you meet and know outside of work. Focusing on a more accessible (i.e. not straight) individual will take your horny mind's focus away from this possibly inaccessible (sex wise) lad.

Good luck!

 

[Tight_End_SC]

So, I have this problem at work....

I manage quite a few individuals at work, and I am pretty good at keeping work separate from pleasure, but there is this guy that is pretty new that popped on the scene. He is incredibly cute, super charming, and is super cool with everything.

He is one of those straight guys who is so friendly and charming that your brain plays tricks on you and says "Maybe he is into me". But he mentions he has a girlfriend and whatnot.

He allwayyysssss talks talks and talks with me. And I have become good friends with him. He invited me to go and climb a mountain with him... and I find myself developing a little crush on him!!!

I have to see him every day and talk with him for my job... uhhh how do I stop this madness??

I would advise you NOT to go down that Rabbit Hole. Save the heartache.

 

[deleted1140262]

So, I have this problem at work....

I manage quite a few individuals at work, and I am pretty good at keeping work separate from pleasure, but there is this guy that is pretty new that popped on the scene. He is incredibly cute, super charming, and is super cool with everything.

He is one of those straight guys who is so friendly and charming that your brain plays tricks on you and says "Maybe he is into me". But he mentions he has a girlfriend and whatnot.

He allwayyysssss talks talks and talks with me. And I have become good friends with him. He invited me to go and climb a mountain with him... and I find myself developing a little crush on him!!!

I have to see him every day and talk with him for my job... uhhh how do I stop this madness??

I’ll take the job

 

[Brodie888]

Just be friends at this stage. Definitely keep the sex thoughts out of the office. It's normal to have friends that you are sexually attracted to but don't allow it to go anywhere.

Outside of work is a different matter. As with most "straight" guys, if they know you are gay and open to play, the ball is really in their court.

 

[hnla394]

The primary issue I see here is that it seems you're in some sort of supervisory position over him. That makes showing interest in your employees a bit of a problematic situation. So if that situation helps you quash this idea, then it's a good one to go with. If you're the boss, this could possibly backfire big time. If you're both employed by someone else, you (and he) could get your ass canned AND you could face legal consequences as his workplace superior. It could also be as simple as his co-workers getting pissed at the preferential treatment he'd get from you (real or imagined).

Run those ideas through your head and you may find your interest in this straight boy waning.

Now if you were only socially acquainted, I might suggest a different approach... and point out that there are bi guys who have girlfriends (hopefully well aware ones who are OK with their guy getting the man stuff elsewhere).

But that isn't the case here.

Another effective way of diminishing such interests is to develop an interest in someone else, preferably gay and someone you meet and know outside of work. Focusing on a more accessible (i.e. not straight) individual will take your horny mind's focus away from this possibly inaccessible (sex wise) lad.

Good luck!

You hit the nail on the head with the supervisory position. And I could easily get fired if I was caught like having a relationship with him.

You know how it is.... with these straight guys they screw with your mind and your mind says "maybe he's actually interested" but in reality not, and then you end up making a complete jackass out of yourself.

 

[OKCLane]

Some states have sex laws regarding persons engaging in sex with subordinates as do many companies. Do your homework.

There is no upside to dating a coworker, even if you are equals. Invariably assignments change and promotions come and go so that coworker may become your boss or subordinate.

Through the years I’ve never dated a coworker and avoided social entanglements to the end they some have thought me aloof or unfriendly. I watched others torpedo promising careers for a turn between the sheets.

You’re an adult so you will do as you please. I’m adding one more voice to those who have recommended that you think with your big head.

 

[Razor500]

You hit the nail on the head with the supervisory position. And I could easily get fired if I was caught like having a relationship with him.

You know how it is.... with these straight guys they screw with your mind and your mind says "maybe he's actually interested" but in reality not, and then you end up making a complete jackass out of yourself.

Let's face it, from your pictures, you are a HOT guy. You can probably get anyone you wanted. So stay away from the hired help, And find an equally hot guy outside the office. The risk to you for getting involved with this guy at work is ENORMOUS. If he turns on you, or gets a lawyer involved, he could ruin your job, career, forever. The hottest sex would not be worth it.

 

[328982]

In my early 20s I worked in quite a stuffy, academic organisation and had a bit of a crush on a more senior guy. He seemed to like me too and we played tennis and stufff outside of work. He was straight and cool with me being gay and said that he'd experimented with guys at university. His marriage was on the rocks and we was looking to move out into rented accommodation at the same time as I needed to find somewhere to live. To my surprise he asked if I'd share a place with him and I readily agreed. We moved in together into a small 2-bedroom house round the corner from work and it was great. We got on well, we played tennis, went to parties together, there was no sex but a close bond. He started having an affair with a younger woman at work who reported to him - or maybe the affair had started earlier and I hadn’t been aware. She moved in with us. She was lovely, very intelligent and talented and we were all good friends. The affair was slightly frowned on at work but there were no repercussions. After a year or so, she moved to a different company and her career thrived. He got divorced, they married and quickly had two children. They are both now managing directors of different companies.

Moral of the story?

 

[OKCLane]

In my early 20s I worked in quite a stuffy, academic organisation and had a bit of a crush on a more senior guy. He seemed to like me too and we played tennis and stufff outside of work. He was straight and cool with me being gay and said that he'd experimented with guys at university. His marriage was on the rocks and we was looking to move out into rented accommodation at the same time as I needed to find somewhere to live. To my surprise he asked if I'd share a place with him and I readily agreed. We moved in together into a small 2-bedroom house round the corner from work and it was great. We got on well, we played tennis, went to parties together, there was no sex but a close bond. He started having an affair with a younger woman at work who reported to him - or maybe the affair had started earlier and I hadn’t been aware. She moved in with us. She was lovely, very intelligent and talented and we were all good friends. The affair was slightly frowned on at work but there were no repercussions. After a year or so, she moved to a different company and her career thrived. He got divorced, they married and quickly had two children. They are both now managing directors of different companies.

Moral of the story?

It’s the exception that proves the rule.

I could list some positive stories as well but they are outpaced by dramatic fiery ends for others. We all have friends who live on the edge while we watch in fascination, eyes half-closed, waiting for the inevitable crash.

I had so much unprotected sex in the 70’s and 80’s that it’s miraculous I made it through without catching anything. A friend of mine, who is typically exceedingly safe, is now positive from one recent encounter with a married man.

Moral? Roll the dice. Maybe you’ll win. Maybe you won’t.

 

[hairybubblebum]

i did this once when I was deployed to Iraq. Just created a generic email and said that I have seen you around and I am into you and if your curious i would love to help you explore. Guy said he was straight but flattered and then a month later hit me up and came over and railed me good.

 

[Razor500]

i did this once when I was deployed to Iraq. Just created a generic email and said that I have seen you around and I am into you and if your curious i would love to help you explore. Guy said he was straight but flattered and then a month later hit me up and came over and railed me good.

Would love to hear the details of this experiment of yours. It sounds awfully hot.

 

[BonerStoner]

A few years ago I had just broke up with my ex and was struggling to move on. I took a random seasonal job to kill some extra time/ make extra money and met this straight guy. He wasn't the most attractive man I've ever met, but something about him drove me absolutely crazy. I had the biggest crush on him and couldn't stop thinking about him (didn't hurt that he had the fattest bubble butt i've ever seen on a guy).

After a while I just told him, I just said I know you are straight and I'm not trying to date you or make a move I just have to confess I have the biggest crush on you. He was really cool about it, a lot cooler than I expected him to be but not cool enough to let me suck his dick haha. It made working with him a lot easier after I got it all off my chest. We actually are pretty good friends now and still keep in touch. I still want to drop to my knees every time I hang out with him, but at least he knows the option is on the table should he ever get curious haha

 

[Razor500]

A few years ago I had just broke up with my ex and was struggling to move on. I took a random seasonal job to kill some extra time/ make extra money and met this straight guy. He wasn't the most attractive man I've ever met, but something about him drove me absolutely crazy. I had the biggest crush on him and couldn't stop thinking about him (didn't hurt that he had the fattest bubble butt i've ever seen on a guy).

After a while I just told him, I just said I know you are straight and I'm not trying to date you or make a move I just have to confess I have the biggest crush on you. He was really cool about it, a lot cooler than I expected him to be but not cool enough to let me suck his dick haha. It made working with him a lot easier after I got it all off my chest. We actually are pretty good friends now and still keep in touch. I still want to drop to my knees every time I hang out with him, but at least he knows the option is on the table should he ever get curious haha

If you're content with the situation, good for you. But damn, being around him without being able to touch sounds like pure he'll to me.

 

[radoveden1]

Always walk away from office romances IMHO. Met a guy and went out a few times. Learned we work together. We both were against hooking up but we had fun a few times anyways. I developed a big crush and then I got really crushed when it didn't materialize. It hurt bad. We slowly regained friend status. We now work together and are a couple offices apart. Unfortunately, feelings for crushes come and go. All is cool though but it isn't always easy. I know he feels the same. Damn.

 

[hnla394]

A few years ago I had just broke up with my ex and was struggling to move on. I took a random seasonal job to kill some extra time/ make extra money and met this straight guy. He wasn't the most attractive man I've ever met, but something about him drove me absolutely crazy. I had the biggest crush on him and couldn't stop thinking about him (didn't hurt that he had the fattest bubble butt i've ever seen on a guy).

After a while I just told him, I just said I know you are straight and I'm not trying to date you or make a move I just have to confess I have the biggest crush on you. He was really cool about it, a lot cooler than I expected him to be but not cool enough to let me suck his dick haha. It made working with him a lot easier after I got it all off my chest. We actually are pretty good friends now and still keep in touch. I still want to drop to my knees every time I hang out with him, but at least he knows the option is on the table should he ever get curious haha

LOL, Rule #1 about crushes, you don’t tell them to their face that you have a crush on them lol

 

[hunGreek]

very relatable. has happened to me a couple of times. never acted on it, it would be a disaster on retrospect. theres a reason its called wishful thinking. it means to translate anything in the most positive light. :/

however, you are both hung and have an amazing body, so you might go sideways and try to spend more time with him, gym, sports. str8 things. get closer to him and just get some eyecandy or who knows what else.

 

[LGA]

I'm in a similar situation now, although my straight friend is like me and has very a dry/abusive/sarcastic sense of humor and that is why we get on so well. He's 'straight' but knows I'm into guys, but I think I'm his main work mate, although he can play it cool with me....he'll always invite me out and is tactile when we mess about (like drunk banter)....he has this unique balance between being really tactile/flirty between 1-5 drinks and then less flirty before and after that amount!

I've crashed at his place before, but on the sofa and we get ready to get out together, but nothing interesting has happened. I find him hard to read generally, but people at work have asked if something is going on between us (which it isn't). I'd prefer to keep him as a mate, but also kinda want to see where things lead!

When drinking he has kissed me on the cheek a few times and tonight when I was getting a taxi he said, night, love you....

I think my main issue, I need to get over is being conscious of being over flirty/touchy when drinking - I'd hate to be the weird/pervy one that no one likes to hang with!