Old gay guys exclusively hitting on young gay guys, what’s your thoughts?

[pass3434]

Got some friends in their 60-70s complaining about dating is hard for them and the reason is that “they have a preference that they are only attracted to young men at 20s or 30s”.

is that really a preference? Or isn’t it all (most) of us prefer a young and energetic partner?

I am in my 30s so I don’t know how dating would be like for men at 60s or 70s. But to me, exclusively hitting on someone 40 years younger than you are is more like a “son issue”.

 

[thereal_ericnyles]

It’s more than likely a combination of factors. I’m not in that age group yet, so I’m not certain how the psyche would be at that age BUT I am middle age older and can empathize to some extent. Generally all Men, whether whatever degree on the sexuality spectrum, organically seek physical youthfulness and a strong “fertile” libido. It’s ingrained in Men, so most will seek it more as they get older. It pretty natural. Either they can be gentlemen about it or they choose to be perverted losers. It depends on the person. Hope that helped.

 

[youngguync]

I’m 22 and primarily go after men 40+. I just think older men are sexier and I’m old enough to know what I like. I have a thing for “daddies” too and usually the men I’m with love playing that role. We both benefit from it. So as long as nobody is being taken advantage of on either sides, I see no issue.

 

[Topher the Gopher]

I have a friend like this. When we first met, I was 19 and he was 59. We had a relationship for a couple of years before an amicable break-up, and we continued on as friends and roommates for several years. He always dated down, saying that was what he liked best. Now, however, he's 76 and has a partner who is close to 40. He says he's happy.

Personally, while I like all kinds of guys, I always preferred older men, mostly because guys my own age were idiots. I can't with stupid guys. The man I'm married to is 61, energetic, and perpetually horny, while I'm 36, often lethargic, and not often interested in sex. It takes all kinds, I guess. We're happy, nonetheless. He truly loves me and doesn't care that I don't get in the mood a lot, but he's grateful when I do.

 

[Brodie888]

I think it's more that some people still want a Ferrari no matter how old they become.

 

[Brodie888]

My neighbour says nobody his own age wants to date him because most people his age want younger.

So the problem cuts both ways.

 

[winesthel945]

I was walking down a street in San Francisco, outside a bar in the Castro neighborhood. I saw two guys standing on the sidewalk chatting, a guy who looked mid-20s and a guy who looked mid-50s.

Mid-50s: "You look younger than your picture."

Mid-20s: (with a smile) "You look older than yours. I guess we both win, daddy."

The dick wants what the dick wants. If you don't understand it, you're not meant to... it's not your dick. But don't yuck someone's yum. There's a lot of bigotry in the gay community, ageism included, and it's very unhealthy.

 

[deleted21466931]

I was walking down a street in San Francisco, outside a bar in the Castro neighborhood. I saw two guys standing on the sidewalk chatting, a guy who looked mid-20s and a guy who looked mid-50s.

Mid-50s: "You look younger than your picture."

Mid-20s: (with a smile) "You look older than yours. I guess we both win, daddy."

The dick wants what the dick wants. If you don't understand it, you're not meant to... it's not your dick. But don't yuck someone's yum. There's a lot of bigotry in the gay community, ageism included, and it's very unhealthy.

I agree. Some older men like younger guys, and vice versa; there is no shortage of young men who like their daddy types.

If they're both consenting adults then it's none of my business, or anybody else's.

There is a lot of ageism in the gay world. If some of those twinks knew how good sex is with a man in his fifties, who has more than 30 years experience pleasuring men, they might not be so dismissive.

 

[LPSG Simon]

Age is really nothing but a number at the end of the day. There could be a factor of complimentary relatability more than anything, and not have to do with the physical aspects that much.

Some people see their romantic life as closer to their leisure life and therefore don't want to spend their time dating people who have a lot of later-life trappings affecting their world view and opinions. Some people like being close to younger because it keeps them in touch and current with what's going on. Maybe they prefer to be around the optimism that comes with youth.

I've found plenty of younger guys who did not grow up in North America prefer older people because they say that men their own age are WAY more immature than those back home as well.

What I find curious is that guys who appreciate maturity, worldly experience, and being around someone who has themselves more sorted and doesn't have as much drama going on in their life dont get as stigmatized as the people on the other end of these pairings do.

 

[youngguync]

I b

Age is really nothing but a number at the end of the day. There could be a factor of complimentary relatability more than anything, and not have to do with the physical aspects that much.

Some people see their romantic life as closer to their leisure life and therefore don't want to spend their time dating people who have a lot of later-life trappings affecting their world view and opinions. Some people like being close to younger because it keeps them in touch and current with what's going on. Maybe they prefer to be around the optimism that comes with youth.

I've found plenty of younger guys who did not grow up in North America prefer older people because they say that men their own age are WAY more immature than those back home as well.

What I find curious is that guys who appreciate maturity, worldly experience, and being around someone who has themselves more sorted and doesn't have as much drama going on in their life dont get as stigmatized as the people on the other end of these pairings do.

I think the younger men aren’t stigmatized as much as the older men because a man 50+ seen by friends, family, and colleagues going after very young men 18-20 that could be their sons/grandsons, especially ones who could pass as younger. I have seen it. It’s okay because it is legal at the end of the day, however it makes you look twice and question why a man is going exclusively after young guys that look like children. From the outside perspective, it’s taboo and out of the ordinary.

 

[LPSG Simon]

I b

I think the younger men aren’t stigmatized as much as the older men because a man 50+ seen by friends, family, and colleagues going after very young men 18-20 that could be their sons/grandsons, especially ones who could pass as younger. I have seen it. It’s okay because it is legal at the end of the day, however it makes you look twice and question why a man is going exclusively after young guys that look like children. From the outside perspective, it’s taboo and out of the ordinary.

That sounds a bit like internalized homophobia playing into the read on the situation. The OP never mentioned anything about anyone looking like children, Just that there was a large age gap.

 

[youngguync]

That sounds a bit like internalized homophobia playing into the read on the situation. The OP never mentioned anything about anyone looking like children, Just that there was a large age gap.

I was speaking from experience as a 22 year old gay man who hasn’t been in the scene very long because of the pandemic. I feel like it can’t get anymore real than that. Don’t paint me as naïve.

 

[youngguync]

That sounds a bit like internalized homophobia playing into the read on the situation. The OP never mentioned anything about anyone looking like children, Just that there was a large age gap.

And I was replying to your statement. Not OP’s where you said older people are stigmatized more.

 

[cedarizzo]

I agree, age is just a number. I've met some very mature younger guys. And I have met some not so mature older guys (my 1st boyfriend).

I've always lived in college towns. In both cases, the number of college students was about half the population. I've seen plenty of older guys who are only interested in younger guys. And I have seen plenty of younger guys interested (or didn't exclude) older guys.

As for myself, when I was younger, I always interested in older guys. But as I aged, my age range stayed about the same. I met my 1st boyfriend when I was 23, he was 33. When I met the 2nd boyfriend, I was 32, he was 33. The 3rd boyfriend, I was 36, he was 26. And the current boyfriend, when we met, I was 42 and he was 28.

 

[steamyman]

If you're lucky enough to find love, or even lust for a few hours (or minutes) with mutual attraction, go for it. Life is too short to worry what others think...and goodness can us gays be judgemental bitches sometimes!

I was a regular sauna user before the pandemic - I had fun with all sorts of guys - I'm in mid 50s now - some my age or older, some much younger. there are a lot of young men who want an older guy.....I've been pulled by some who could were very much like Corbin fisher porn actors. That's an ego boost let me tell you!

Just go for it and enjoy!

 

[NiceAnonGuy]

It depends.

Scenario A: Would I find it extremely unsettling when a 60 year old man is with an 18 year old who looks way younger than his age? Yes.

Scenario B: Would I feel the same way towards that same 60 year old man for dating a 27 year old with a beard and a rugged look? No.

However, if all parties are consenting adults then it is not my place to openly comment or intervene. All that you can do is pray and hope that nobody is getting taken advantage off.

(For reference, I’m in my early 30’s and am generally attracted to those somewhat close to my age..let’s say 23-43’ish - though as I age I see myself liking older men more and more.)

 

[deleted15329811]

I have more in common with guys 40 and up (more realistically 35 and up now im 35) I dunno young guys tend to be either incredibly vapid, or think that just because my current age bracket has a 3 that im generous, bitch I aint a sugar daddy! Besides there is something to be said for an older hairy bear daddy sensual lover!

 

[playklax01]

As long as everyone is of legal age and consenting, it's nobody's business. Love takes all forms. If you have a problem with it, close your eyes and walk away.

 

[HungBtmVegas]

I seek older guys and they seek me, everyone has a preference

 

[hvdude]

I am in what would be considered the "older" crowd, but I think I am in pretty good shape physically. When I'm at the gym there seem to be a lot of younger guys. They pretty much hang out together; some of them are cute and some downright hot. There are also guys in their 30's and 40's who are really good looking or have a certain "look". I sometimes think (hope?) they are looking at me. I guess what I'm saying is that age doesn't really matter. A person is attracted to another because of, well, attraction. It's just that simple.
Now, if any of the guys approached me what would I say/do? I'm not sure that would ever happen (most people go to the gym, get in their workout and go). Would I ever 'hit on" the younger guys? No, for fear of either being laughed at or punched.