I've had female friends for over 25 years and while I will admit there has been some sexual tension where I really felt like they were kinda falling for me and if I made a move it would've been a fuckfest like crazy, we've always just been really great, close friends who confide in each other. One friend, a colleague of mine too, in particular noted that its easy for me to have 'girlfriends' because I want to talk about real stuff, get right down to it, no bullshit and just let it all fly, all the emotions and laughing and crying etc.. My guy friends, they don't do anything like that. Its bullshit boring sports talk, or kind of the male version of gossip about some of our friends who are on the slide and starting to fuck their lives up due to a woman or financial problems, or a mix of both; talk about our jobs which I do enjoy, but its kind of vapid talk; and a sort of joking and playing around with words that helps to pass the time. Oh talk about music too but in a more technical sense since a whole lot of us are musicians.
My female friend I'm talking about above is about 18 years older than me, and I certainly had a crush on her 25 years ago and I know for a fact she had one on me because another female friend of mine spilled the beans. It couldn't go anywhere though. She had an on-off boyfriend who she wound up marrying and is now retired with him and they are loving life. But we're still very close and have a lot of fun; I spend the night at her place alone but of course stay in a guest room, and we have parties together with a few other friends, or just us we have a dinner and drinks party just the two of us. Great fun, great conversation, really amazing relationship. Almost never once had an argument. Hell at one point I was living there several days a week for like 2 years due to a school situation I was in.
I have a female friend who is like 15 years younger than me too, gorgeous, sexy, fit, fun, quirky, a super nerd, a musician, great hair, dates quite a lot of guys until she finds her match that lasts a few years until something goes awry, and we have gotten very close. I think in the beginning we were both very attracted to each other and there might have been a slim chance she wanted me. I'm married though and she hates cheaters, she wants to chop the dude's dick off she told me, she's really against it. But there was some playful fun tension for almost a year; its been almost 10 years now we've been close. Again, confiding in each other in ways I never get to with guys, I don't know why, I think its that standard men don't like to show their emotions at all unless its anger or laughing. Extremes.
I have other female friends but sometimes they lose interest in friendship. I think (and I've vetted this with the first friend above of 25 years) that these girls are all cool and friendly in the beginning, but something happens and they suddenly turn on me or don't like me at all anymore. I said to my friend "I think its because they are attracted to me and as soon as they realize there's no chance they can get in my pants, they hate me." She agreed!! She said that's a common trait of women all over: friends at first with the hopes of a screw. If no screw, no need to hang, time to move on to the next guy to "befriend".
I would never have sex with my female friends. If I lost my wife to cancer, which could come back and if it does it will be devastating and she might not beat it a third time, I might want to pursue a deeper intimate relationship with one of my friends, but its been so long, I can't see it happening. I'd want to be in a sexual intimate relationship with a friend, though, for sure, because that's how it started with my wife. We hung out about 4 months before we had sex, the last month we started hooking up and making out, but we took our time and it was nice. And we've been together and very happy ever since
Yes men can have platonic friendships with women, and maybe even deeper friendships, and there doesn't have to be any sex or kissing or anything involved.
