Platonic relationships between opposite sexes

[Grown_boy27]

is it possible, from your viewpoint as a woman, for a man and women to be exclusively, platonically friends ?

Thank you for reading. I’m male,27. I recently had an urge to strike conversation with a girl I saw at the gym. She said something to me a previous day, and I felt like talking back but it felt wrong. I’m in a relationship with a women now, it’s been for 10 years. I’ve had many female “friendships “ or small talk happen to me at work but ultimately lead to me sleeping with them. I’ve told my partner about it. It gives her anxiety if I were to befriend or speak to a women more than just quick talk at work. I understand why.

I’ve been rewiring my brain this past year. I’ve cheated alot. With both men and women. But I still talk to men platonically , of course. But with women, it always feels like I’m close to playing with fire. This new girl at the gym I met, I don’t wnat to sleep with her. But based on my track record, I’m not even sure if it’s the best idea to talk to her. I met my current partner and fell in love with her the more I knew about her. I fell in love with her more each day.

Would I risk “falling in love “ with a different woman if we were to be just friends, if I were to speak to her regularly ?

Thanks for reading this if you did.

 

[EllieP]

I have many male friends and no urge or even a twinge to want to extend our relationship beyond platonic.

I am not naive enough to believe this is possible with all women and men. I'm just wired that way, and I know a number of women who are as well. Hell, I know women who have a platonic relationship with their husbands!

I'm also not denying that among my male friends there may be lurking a spark or desire to move our relationship to another level. Of course, that will never happen as long as I'm with my partner, and I intend to be for a very long time.

The fact that you cannot remain loyal to your partner tells me that you may not be able to stifle those urges. Once you view women as a peer rather than a conquest you may discover that a platonic relationship is quite possible.

 

[Scarletbegonia]

My particular view on friendships among men and women won’t impact your habit of cheating.

In my circles, it’s common for friends to be opposite genders.

 

[Grown_boy27]

I have many male friends and no urge or even a twinge to want to extend our relationship beyond platonic.

I am not naive enough to believe this is possible with all women and men. I'm just wired that way, and I know a number of women who are as well. Hell, I know women who have a platonic relationship with their husbands!

I'm also not denying that among my male friends there may be lurking a spark or desire to move our relationship to another level. Of course, that will never happen as long as I'm with my partner, and I intend to be for a very long time.

The fact that you cannot remain loyal to your partner tells me that you may not be able to stifle those urges. Once you view women as a peer rather than a conquest you may discover that a platonic relationship is quite possible.

Thank you for taking the time to respond with this detailed explanation. I’ve let it sink in since I’ve read it when it posted. I don’t think I’ll ever forget your statement on viewing women as a peer rather than a conquest.

 

[Tight_N_Juicy]

The fact that you put "falling in love" in quotes says a whole fuckin lot. I read the words but I hear with my brain "want to fuck".

I have had genuine friendships with straight men... platonic and friends who occasionally fuck. None of those guys used words quite like you did here.

Some people can appreciate and maintain genuine friendships. Some people can't. Meh. I'm hungry

 

[Grown_boy27]

Hi. Thanks for the response. What’s wrong with putting the falling in love in quotes ? Were the words I used here wrong? I just ask for understanding and perspective. I hope it doesn’t come off as rude.

 

[EllieP]

Hi. Thanks for the response. What’s wrong with putting the falling in love in quotes ? Were the words I used here wrong? I just ask for understanding and perspective. I hope it doesn’t come off as rude.

I don't know if English is your primary language, but putting phrases in quotes without actually quoting anything usually indicates sarcasm or double entendre. For example, if I write that I'm going to "do the laundry by hand," it could be a cheeky way of saying that I'm going to pleasure myself.

Or saying that guy is "smart" could mean he's just the opposite.

English is just weird.

 

[Grown_boy27]

I don't know if English is your primary language, but putting phrases in quotes without actually quoting anything usually indicates sarcasm or double entendre. For example, if I write that I'm going to "do the laundry by hand," it could be a cheeky way of saying that I'm going to pleasure myself.

Or saying that guy is "smart" could mean he's just the opposite.

English is just weird.

I get it. English is my first language. I have been thinking that I need a refresher on my use of grammar and punctuation. I’m not sure why I put the initial statement in quotes, but I can see how it can sound sarcastic. Thank you for the explanation.