Predicament

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by jhood08, Feb 4, 2009.

  1. jhood08

    jhood08 New Member

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    Well here goes.. This is my first thread so guys be mindful. Here's the story: A frined of mine (a guy) recently spent the night at my house after a big tournament (we are both into martial arts) and well we were tired. So we watched a movie and everything was pretty normal... But then suddenly I caught myself carefully and i mean carefully (lol:biggrin1:) studyin (to the point where i was just plainly admiring) every single detail of his PERFECT body. And I had the sudden urge to pull his pants down to get a good look at his cock (i probably should have mentioned im bi). Now im guessing he is well hung because of the bulge i always see coming from his pants. Well after fighting off the urge i finally fell asleep only waking to the same sensation. So i got up and I went ahead to make breakfast. After breakfast we decide to go to the pool (the weather was really nice). At the pool we swan some then we started to wrestle. Now and then I had to stop to hide a few hard ons. But we wrestled most of the time until we got tired and went back home. After a shower (he finished before me) I was changing and he was staring at me while i dressed which was awkward but i still liked it. Well later he left and now i'm in a HUGE dilema. I don't know what to do. I feel like telling him how i feel bucause I have developed a strong attraction for him. Now i can barely control myself from flinging myself into his arms everytime i see him. Oh he also doesn't know that i'm bi because i never really told him. So can someone please tell me what to do?? I'm not sure if he's bi or gay or straight but i have no idea what to do. PLEASE HELP ME!!:confused:
     
  2. D_Andreas Sukov

    D_Andreas Sukov Account Disabled

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    mention your bi in passing. see his reaction and you can guage from it. i accept that might be hard but even as a joke you could get a good idea. then if it feels right ask him his persuation. and move from then on. if hes also bi, tell him. if hes straight, you may be stuck but i mean you get to wrestle every so often, so your hardly gonna miss out fully ;)
     
  3. retep2

    retep2 New Member

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    he might be bi or even gay ... why not watch some kinda sexy movie (not porn) to start a conversation about sex (maybe while smokin a joint or drinking) ... you might mention that you'd like to explore sex with a woman, maybe even try something with a guy (or a 3 some) ... if he balks, you could say "well, yeah you're right: it's only some kind of weird fantasy -- mostly when I'm drunk/stoned"
     
  4. ohhhey

    ohhhey Member

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    Do you have any mutual friends you could talk to? If you tell him you're bi and he's insecure he might freak out a bit about all the wrestling etc.
     
  5. sexplease

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    First, I'll address your opinion of him: He ain't all that. Period. If you were blind, you would see him much much differently. Ya ever buy a used car? It's all shiny and waxed, and purrs like a kitten? Well sometime, after about a month, you start noticing the dents. And scratches and the missing dash bulb. And that purring... it's a slow leak from the rear tire. And did I mention, there is no spare in the trunk?

    See, we are all past first crushes (it's called that, 'cause it hurts) here, so it's time to take off the rose glasses and see people for what they are: Needy and self serving. Sure, some of us do nice things to and for others, but mostly, everyone wants one or several of their holes satisfied. And you are no exception. Nor am I. I just recognize there is no Man in a big red suit spreading glee and cheer around the globe.
    Trust me, he's got baggage, maybe it's just carry-on, but he's got. And probably asymmetry, ear-hair and passes gas.

    Secondly, for you. You do not have a dilemma. A dilemma is a difficult choice, between two or more alternatives, often undesirable ones. What you have is: Opportunity. Specifically, the opportunity to use the verbal skills you've learned in school and life to promote your wants, needs and desires with someone you are attracted to, open and honestly.

    My suggestion: Be open and honest. You will sleep at night knowing you did and do and be the best YOU - you can be.
    If Mr Martial Arts' interests are similar, you two will walk a similar path for a while. Maybe for just the moments of your [open and honest conversation] with him, or maybe, a month, a year or until one of you plants daisies over the other.
     
  6. jhood08

    jhood08 New Member

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    Thnx everybody for your opinions! I always thought about being open and honest with him but it scares me cuz even if he's not gay or bi he's stil a good friend and i wouldn't want to ruin that. We've been through alot together but not intimatly soo it's kinda difficult for me to just put that on a limb. Anyways its tru we can be blind but i am pretty sure i can look past the haze to see he is an amazing person! I would love any more suggestions! ND thnx to everyone.... I'll try a little bit of everything... and anyways i still willl get the benefit of wrestling him (hehe):biggrin1:!
     
  7. jhood08

    jhood08 New Member

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    OH I almost forgot to metion. We planned our weekend which involves me spending the whole weekend at his house and us going clubbing! So i plan to tell him of course when he's sober so wish me luck!:redface:
     
  8. retep2

    retep2 New Member

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    We expect a detailed report!
     
  9. jhood08

    jhood08 New Member

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    Well i'm back. Sorry i took an eternity to answer, but i hope you can cope with me. Well there's been a problem and I've tried to work it out but it's become impossible to overlook. Well we sorta have a new person in our group but the thing is that he goes wherever we go (even on our weekend at his house that i mentioned before). I haven't gotten an alone time with Mr. Martial Arts (lol) for a long while. Now I've gotten more and more jints that he might be atracted to me cuz when the three od us our together we sorta get lost in our "fights" and ignore the "third wheel" and he always tries to seek a way to spend time with me. Now hopefully for the firsst time in months i will have a day where its just the two of us and this is when i'm planning to open up to him.
     
  10. MarkLondon

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    If you're going to try to take it further, I feel that it should be more personal than just an abstract announcement of your sexual label. For example "Our wrestling often turns me on" rather than "I'm bi".

    Are you sure he hasn't noticed your hard-on?
     
  11. jhood08

    jhood08 New Member

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    I'm pretty sure cuz he's blunt about things. Lol. Nd he's not dumb. But I wasn't planin on making a flat out statement like that i was going to be nice and subtle.
     
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