Putting Your Affairs In Order

Discussion in 'Funny Stuff: Jokes, Quizzes, Games & Pics' started by nudeyorker, Apr 22, 2010.

  1. nudeyorker

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Nov 6, 2006
    Messages:
    42,918
    Likes Received:
    36
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    NYC/Honolulu
    I got this in an e-mail today. It made me giggle.


    The doctor, after an examination, sighed and said, "I've got some
    bad news. You have cancer, and you'd best put your affairs in order." The
    woman was shocked, but managed to compose herself and walk into the waiting
    room where her daughter had been waiting.

    "Well, daughter, we women celebrate when things are good, and we
    celebrate when things don't go so well. In this case, things aren't well. I
    have cancer. So, let's head to the club and have a martini."
    After 3 or 4 martinis, the two were feeling a little less somber. There
    were some laughs and more martinis. They were eventually approached by some
    of the woman's old friends, who were curious as to what the two were
    celebrating. The woman told her friends they were drinking to her impending
    end. "I've been diagnosed with AIDS." The friends were aghast, gave the
    woman their condolences and beat a hasty retreat.

    After the friends left, the woman's daughter leaned over and whispered,
    "Momma, I thought you said you were dying of cancer, and you just told your
    friends you were dying of AIDS! Why did you do that?"

    "Because I don't want any of those bitches sleeping with your father
    after I'm gone."
    And THAT, my friends, is what is called, "Putting Your Affairs In
    Order."
     
  2. petite

    petite New Member

    Joined:
    Mar 3, 2010
    Messages:
    7,539
    Albums:
    2
    Likes Received:
    33
    Gender:
    Female
    That was great! I love it!
     
  3. crescendo69

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Aug 27, 2006
    Messages:
    8,142
    Likes Received:
    20
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Knoxville, TN
    Now that is jealousy to the max.
     
  4. MASSIVEPKGO_CHUCK

    MASSIVEPKGO_CHUCK Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Aug 9, 2003
    Messages:
    28,012
    Likes Received:
    725
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    the pain behind your eyes
    Talk about not screwing up affairs.:biggrin:
     
  5. D_Chaumbrelayne_Copprehead

    D_Chaumbrelayne_Copprehead Account Disabled

    Joined:
    Jan 9, 2008
    Messages:
    8,978
    Likes Received:
    11
    I'm stealing that one.
     
  6. hockeyguy741

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Mar 20, 2008
    Messages:
    8,507
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    3
Draft saved Draft deleted