Selecting a masseur

[SilentMajority]

I want to get a massage for theraputic reasons, but don't have an issue and would probably prefer some degree of sensual massage. I've looked at various sites online where masseurs advertise, but I have this lingering concern that someone may have cameras especially since many seem to work from a private space in their homes.

I don't have anyone I'd be able to ask for a recommendation, so how do you suggest I screen possible masseurs. BTW, I'm not looking for a rub and tug, but I'm not opposed to a good massage with some sexual overtones.

 

[EssexMaker]

I have a similar problem myself. Not the filming aspect, exactly - as I am over 60 I doubt anyone would find me wank bait, but I am always concerned the masseur might have a partner who doesn't know about his partner's side hustle and burst in and cause a scene - this happened to me in Barkingside about 20 years ago, and it was embarrassing and uncomfortable as they ended up coming to blows, while I got my clothes on and left in an oily state - not pleasant on a cold night in January.

Like the OP I don't mind the more sensual aspects, but most masseurs round my area seem to be late teenage/early to mid 20s, who use massage as a cover for more exotic activities and I am not really into wanting "escort" serviices. There is, for me, something a bit seedy about a man of 62 going to a 20 year old for sexual services (nothing wrong with it for those who think differently). I genuinely find massage helpful as I get very tense because some of my work is quite physical, and I get tense shoulders, neck back etc. I don't want it for ten minutes foreplay. I did phone up somebody in my area not long ago, and got a list of very strange and irrelevant questions (was I hairy or smooth, cut or uncut, top or bottom etc?) so obviously we were not on the same wavelength.

I used to have a mate of a similar age to myself, and we used to have a massage exchange every Friday evening. He was married and bi-curious and there was a little bit of playing about but the massages were the main thing, but he and his family went off to Glasgow a year or two ago.

Somebody suggested to me that, with rising bills and shorter working hours a lot of men who advertise handyman/odd job services in free newspapers and cards in sweet shop windows would probably be prepared to help me out wth genuine massage, but in all honesty, I would be too embarrased to broach the subject, and , I would feel uncomfortable getting a possibly straight man to do it and then perhaps make him feel embarrassed or even ashamed afterwards (this happened the first few times with the Friday night mate I mentioned earlier), though he became OK about it when he knew he could trust me.

I'd just add that as I get high blood pressure, which gives me ED from time to time, sex is not the prime motivation for me - I just like touch and the sense of being smoothed out. Like getting your hair cut, it's nice to have company from time to time, and to feel better afterwards.

Does anybody have any advice?.. I would feel happier with a man over 35 , not a late teen or twentysomething.

Perhaps us older blokes should set up a "massage exchange" system, though I suspect Facebook would not be happy with the idea.

If you have been thanks for reading this tale of woe. I have been as honest as I can be.

 

[goldscorpguy]

Two great posts and on a subject close to my heart too. I am in my early 60s and also prefer a massage from someone of a similar age and sex. I hate those overpriced hotel spa sessions where men can only get a back rub, swim shorts are statutory, and any hint of an erection results in the death penalty.

Just before lockdown I was sitting in the sauna of my gym having a similar conversation to this thread with a guy whom I'd befriended there. He is gay and knows I'm bi though we have only ever chatted and shared the occasional and very serepticious stroke. Anyway, he recommended a masseur who I have gone back to regularly ever since. He is my age and offers a full, skilled massage, either completely straight or as kinky as I want. I have gotten to know him over the course of our sessions and feel very relaxed in his company. We have always discussed, via WhatsApp, what I needed and, just as importantly, what I liked before each visit. We have a clear understanding on this. If I have a back or leg muscle issue then he will work on that. If I need a little "extra" attention then he will do that too. He always works on me naked, that's him and me, but he did ask about this at the start and knows that I like this now. He will do a very intimate massage if I need it, including a prostate rub (which drives me wild). Yes, the sessions have become more and more sexual over time, but that has suited me and has been consensual.

I guess I have been lucky in getting a recommendation to someone, and it has worked out well. Also, he only charges 40 pounds an hour, which in today's rates is pretty good.

If you can't get a recommendation, try the obvious Google searches for your area, look for reviews, and most importantly, have a conversation about what they offer, and what might be expected. If they have their own site rather than just a FB page, then that, IMO, is better.

 

[herbho]

I'm not in the UK, but I can tell you of my preferences in selecting a masseur. I get frequent massages ( twice a week very often). Some people smoke, some people, drink; I get massages. I have found that masseurfinder.com has worked very well for me in my area. When I look at the photos, etc. I almost always go for the older man ( it has to be a man). I figure that he has had experience and is not necessarily going for the rub and rug, which I eschew. It matters not to me what he looks like, since I'm going for a massage, not a romantic dinner. And, I will often look for an older Asian man who has been trained in Asia, since they are usually pretty uninhibited with where they touch, which is part of their training, and are nonchalant about things like erections, which I get 100% of the time I'm being massaged. But, experience is a good thing. Once I have found a good masseur, I will go back to him, since the second massage is almost always better than the first, because each of us can be more relaxed. That's one thing I will always do - go back to the masseur if the first one is good. I prefer Swedish and Asian techniques with medium pressure. If the massage is a bit sensuous, all the better. Right now, there are five masseurs that I go to regularly, depending on what kind I want. One is more sensuous than the others, paying particular attention to my ass ( my most erogenous zone, especially my crack and hole). Another is more relaxing, etc. The whole process is trial and error; some are just terrible. But, go with the idea of just getting a good massage. If the masseur is experienced, he will take his cues from your body and now you respond to being touched.