To extrapolate further on your point, if you're with someone you fit together well with, surely orgasms with him aren't all the same? Surely there are deviations between orgasm intensity? Assuming that's correct, and not all your orgasms with someone you fit together well with are the same, what causes the bad ones? Are the things you've listed (chemistry, mood, intoxication, cycle) the only ones that can 'weaken' your orgasm with that guy?
Hope that's not being too specific, and that I'm making sense.
Example. I have amazing chemistry with this one dude. He's not my usual type. A little skinny for my taste. But his mind, and the way he expressed himself, his sense of style, his outlook are so sexy to me. Sometimes it just takes watching him walk to me, and I'm ready to go inside for a quickie instead of whatever he came outside to do with me. Like, a week or two ago, he was having car trouble, and he asked me to run him around to do errands. I shared my location with him, and so he was outside locking his door when I pulled up. His walk was like living jazz, and when he sat in my little truck and gave me a big hug, the scent of him was like a drug. It was difficult to drive away from his house, but I promised myself I would follow him inside when we got back. There are reasons I should stop fucking him. But when I pull away he lures me back. There's something magnetic between us. Then, there is the physical fit. He's got an average length and a pronounced curve to his erection. When he teases the outer third of my vagina, it just naturally finds my g-spot on every stroke and the anterior fornix when he gives me the whole length. Unless I'm dehydrated, I climax hard and wetly within a few minutes. It's faster than with anyone else ever, and faster than I can masturbate. Every time. With him, the physical fit and the chemistry is all that is needed. If he goes down on me just to get me wet for penetration, that feels different from when he goes down on me just for my pleasure, and those times are more intense. This is the only way his skill ever factors in.
Another dude, also not my usual type, this one much fatter than I normally find attractive, is different. With him, it's all skill. He has a large endowment. It has taken months of regular sex to get to the point where I can comfortably accept his whole length. Now, it's a very good physical fit.
Now, because there is no discomfort to ignore, I can get an orgasm through posterior fornix stimulation. Something about the shape of his erection creates a vacuum. It feels like my posterior fornix is getting alternately pressed, rubbed, and sucked. Never felt anything like it.
It makes me temporarily stupid. He once sent me out to pick up breakfast while he laundered his sheets and remade his bed. Simple task, but I kept struggling to get it right. It was three blocks away, and I kept getting lost, despite his very clear directions. As an Uber/Lyft driver, I've taken people to and from that restaurant many times. I struggled to find it, to place the order, to get the correct change. I missed a mistake by the lady who placed my order and billed me. I spilled coffee and juice in my pristine little truck. It was like being locked out of my brain. Stuck on stupid.
The sex. It fucks my brain up every time. It's so good. We go at it for hours every time, both unable or unwilling to stop. "Wait, don't make me come yet." And we wait, a few seconds that stretch interminably, eyes locked together, as I search the pitch black lakes through the windows of his soul, trying to find the bottom. He strokes again, finally, and I'm shattered; joyfully, willingly broken and mended, over and over. His aim is true, and his spirit is as sweet and loving as a puppy, even as he growls filth into my sensitive ear, savagely bites into my neck, relentlessly thumping me into the perfection that is his mattress.
But his skill? His true skill is in what he can do to my body with his mouth and fingers. His skill is in how he knows when to let me ride out an orgasm, and when to prevent it, and how.
I've never had another partner ever who had to launder the sheets immediately after fucking me. I've never been this wet with anyone else, ever. You know the age old joke about who sleeps in the wet spot? We would both have to. In fact, if he doesn't already have clean sheets to put on the bed and we want to sleep it off, he removes the soaked through towels from the bed, and covers the soaking wet sheets with new towels so we can be dry.
I think the reason I'm so slow after laying with him is mild hypovolemia from dehydration. I've been severely dehydrated at his house before. "Sorry I took all your water," he said to me, smirking. He does take it. He stops and withdraws to go down and slurp it up as through a straw. I love that sound. And still, the bed is too wet to use for sleep or lounging. I've been too dehydrated to keep playing. I've been too dehydrated to climax. I've been too dehydrated to go home. Clearly, I've been too dehydrated to go get breakfast from the Handsome Biscuit. I can't fuck him during my period. I refuse. I can't be anemic and that dehydrated. I think that man could fuck me to death.
It's not chemistry. It's not magnetic attraction. It's that he eats my pussy like the world spins on my orgasms. He fingers me like he might find a platinum mine in there. He coaxes orgasms out of me like he's some kind of cum charmer. I cannot get enough. His skill trumps the other guy's perfect physical fit and interpersonal chemistry with me every time.
While each session with each partner is different, if they are applying their skills as usual, the only difference is where I am in my cycle (which changes the position of my cervix, and the viscosity of my juices) my level of hydration (which impacts my ability to self-lubricate, and can prevent orgasm). My mood doesn't change much with them, given we don't live together. I do prefer one over the other, but that preference is slight. I have a lot of fun with each. I go a few rounds with each, it's just more leisurely with the heavier one. A few hours with him, stopping for the day after he finally allows himself to climax, as opposed to maybe an hour with the skinny one, during which he will climax several times. The bigger one brings his entire A game every time. The thinner one doesn't, but he doesn't have to. His dick was made just for me. The fit is flawless. I'm going to come hard, immediately, every time.
I'm not sure if I answered your questions, but those are the differences that occur within my current sexual relationships.
Edited to add:
Intoxication never weakens my orgasms. In reducing my sensitivity, it makes more kinds of orgasms possible. Sensations that are too intense to tolerate sober, feel good when drunk or mildly stoned. It does make it take longer to orgasm. Mushrooms increase my sensitivity, and make any orgasm much more intense. I have no sense of time on shrooms, and have no idea if orgasm takes longer to achieve. I've also only ever masturbated while using them, never had intercourse.
