After sitting down and breaking a pen which was in your back pocket, common hairspray should be applied to the inky mess, blotting it up slowly. It even works on dried ink. It also works if you ran the vacuum over a pen and caused it to break leaving ink in your carpet. Keep adding more of the solution until all the ink is gone.
Never try to feed a panda without some level of protection to your hand if it is covered with moss (the hand, not the panda).
Naming a cat Pickles can lead to strange dinner time conversation when the cat goes missing-so don't name your cat Pickles (or any other food item).
Never put an egg still in the shell, in the microwave unless you have time to spare cleaning up.
Licorice bites can be used as earplugs, as can marshmallows.
Roach spray can be used as a deterrent of mice-although you need to use a full can and if any is on an area you will be walking barefoot, there will be a tingling sensation to the feet.
Instead of some fancy high priced white-noise sound machine, a simple fan does the same trick while circulating the air.