Annoying human etiquette.
- Thread starter Mr_Ri0t
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redneckgymrat
Experimental Member
Let me get this straight...you came into the room, sat her down, and told her "Hi honey, I like men more than I like you..." Yeah, why would she be offended?!
Try this. CountryGuy has a great quote on his SIG line, that says "50% gay, but AlphaMale is my 100%"
Make it personal for her. You like women. You like men. But you LOVE her.
Try this. CountryGuy has a great quote on his SIG line, that says "50% gay, but AlphaMale is my 100%"
Make it personal for her. You like women. You like men. But you LOVE her.
Not really, I was telling her a story from school. I was pretending to gauge my colleagues, rofl, and I uttered my own ratio. She actually asked me then, which way it went.
You gotta understand, we're pretty good at communicating, so her "offense" wasn't what you'd expect. It was more like: "oh, really? Ouch..."
I love her, I dote on her a lot, I tell her that she is beautiful every. single. day.
You gotta understand, we're pretty good at communicating, so her "offense" wasn't what you'd expect. It was more like: "oh, really? Ouch..."
I love her, I dote on her a lot, I tell her that she is beautiful every. single. day.
hud01
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Semi... you are lucky. It is not etiquette, it is a relationship issue. I was lucky many years ago that I had a gf who wanted me to play with guys, but most would throw you out the door.
hud01
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I agree entirely that you can't control to whom or what you are attracted sexually and I also agree that you shouldn't have to oppress yourself. What you can do, though, is control how and when it's expressed or acted upon and that's what you choose to do when you're in a relationship. You choose not to act upon attractions to persons other than your partner.
What posters are saying, entirely correctly, is that by telling your girlfriend that you are generally more attracted to men than you are to women you are making a statement that she's probably going to find threatening to her sense of security with you. It can undermine her sense of self-confidence and confidence in you knowing that she can't compete in an area where she can't possibly provide something she doesn't have: a dick. (And I speak as someone with some familiarity with this issue, having spent five years with a 60/40 boyfriend who ultimately left me for a woman.)
The good news here is that if your communication is as open and honest as you say it is, and if you really do love her, are committed to her, and are attracted to her, and if you continue to reassure her of those things you may continue to hold her trust.
the boy knows my percentages lean heavily toward the queer side of things (90/10-80/20) he's kinda ego-fluffed about being "the boy"
is really about how secure the relationship is.. and how secure ya partner feels. he, and i, figure his heart beats awesome where other human beings make due with blood. he's not threatened.. he's not worried i am gonna float off when a hottie catches my eye.
is really about how secure the relationship is.. and how secure ya partner feels. he, and i, figure his heart beats awesome where other human beings make due with blood. he's not threatened.. he's not worried i am gonna float off when a hottie catches my eye.
rob_just_rob
Sexy Member
If you're lazy, lie.
Otherwise, find a subtle way to avoid the question (although on rereading the thread, it seems you brought this up. Why did you think it would be a good idea?)
I mean, I used to routinely say things to annoy women who were interested in me, with the aim of discouraging them. But if you do like this girl... again, why did you think telling her you prefer guys would be a good idea?
Otherwise, find a subtle way to avoid the question (although on rereading the thread, it seems you brought this up. Why did you think it would be a good idea?)
I mean, I used to routinely say things to annoy women who were interested in me, with the aim of discouraging them. But if you do like this girl... again, why did you think telling her you prefer guys would be a good idea?
shroomhead77
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She can leave you if she's hurt by it. If she'd rather stay with a guy who is more into men, than women, well......(no comment).
You are so right.....I do not need the competition. It is bad that I must compete with other women for a man, but a man......? I don't think so!
I appreciate that the thread started was being honest with his gf.
I'm nor sure she was being judgemental as oppossed to being scrared by the potential that she might not be your strongest desire. (as said by previuos posters).
My additional point is that she is now aware of more about you.
I'm nor sure she was being judgemental as oppossed to being scrared by the potential that she might not be your strongest desire. (as said by previuos posters).
My additional point is that she is now aware of more about you.
Being an open bisexual guy in a relationship with a women can be pretty complicated. There are not rules or conventions to fall back on.
But kudos for being so open. I think if more guys were honest with themselves we'd see a lot of acceptance of men's sexuality. I don't like the double standard where women it's a lot more accepted for women to have fluidity in there sexuality but men have to keep it hidden.
Honestly I want to see an end to the men being on the "down low", and all the secrets and lying to their partners.
But right now no there is no etiquette, in a way your a trailblazer.
But kudos for being so open. I think if more guys were honest with themselves we'd see a lot of acceptance of men's sexuality. I don't like the double standard where women it's a lot more accepted for women to have fluidity in there sexuality but men have to keep it hidden.
Honestly I want to see an end to the men being on the "down low", and all the secrets and lying to their partners.
But right now no there is no etiquette, in a way your a trailblazer.
mickeylee--like this. "both people are in the relationship-even the one that will tend to lean the other way." someone is either committed to you or not. percentages don't matter.
episcopalian---i don't think of it as compitition. someone wants to be with you or not be with you. and, if the person goes off with someone else---Yes, it hurts, and, can hurt a bunch. but, in the long run no one wants to be with someone who would rather be with someone else.
percentages are a way of explaining yourself. people like who they like who they like.
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OK so what if she told you she was primarily lesbian but experimenting with you. Would that be a breach of "etiquette" ? I think it's only natural to be concerned that any day you might decide that men are really your preference and dump her. But like ML said if the relationship is real, and it's solid you'll find a way to make it work. I think you need to understand why she feels the way she does and not be annoyed by it.
