Childhood misconceptions

[nudeyorker]

As a kid I always wanted to be a grocery clerk because I thought they kept all the cash register money.

I always thought Tang was health food because Astronauts drank it.

As a latch key kid growing up in the suburbs my parents weren't around much and didn't teach me much. I was pretty much educated by the TV. Sad huh?

I think you turned out fairly splendidly. Have another glass of Tang and enjoy!

 

[D_Tilly_De_Toilet]

For years I thought the character Murphy Brown was a man. When I finally saw an episode of the show and discovered that Murphy was in fact a woman my mind was completely blown and I felt like a fool for not knowing sooner.

I also originally thought that God's name was Bob. In Bob we trust.

 

[Calboner]

I also originally thought that God's name was Bob. In Bob we trust.

Maybe it is. What makes you so Bob-damned sure it isn't?

 

[rob_just_rob]

As a small child, I thought if you put a penny on the railway tracks, there was a real danger of derailing the train. I remember standing about 200 m back of the track when some companions put coins on the rail.

 

[Channelwood]

There's a wonderful segment of "This American Life" that deals with childhood misconceptions that stick around well into adulthood.

Check out Act One of the show here: A Little Bit of Knowledge | This American Life

 

[MsThang]

Girls were Icky...now that I think of it, I still have that misconception.

LMAO...now that's funny

 

[willow78]

Once I was with my mother visiting one of her friends and her friend's little girl. The friend had gained a lot of weight since I'd last seen her (she was pregnant). I whispered this to my mother (the friend didn't hear me). My mother whispered back "It's another baby". At the time, I didn't realize it was actually in her belly. I just thought she'd stuffed it up her shirt!

 

[willow78]

No fear involved with the misconception but there was a mote of concern from the response that voicing it elicited. It was even arrived at logically (if based on fallacy).

I knew that dinosaurs had died out a long time ago.
My mother had told me what it was like when TV was first invented.
The Flintstones had both dinosaurs and TV.

I was 5 when I asked her what it was like living with the dinosaurs. The reaction was not good.

:lmao:

This one is brilliant! Gillette deserves a prize!

 

[earllogjam]

I think you turned out fairly splendidly. Have another glass of Tang and enjoy!

Aw mahalo Nudie. I suppose "fairly" is the operative word here. Bottoms up!

 

[Hoss]

The people in television shows were inside the set, they were all magically shrunk and went through the electric wire to get there.
Nuns & Priests were married to each other, Nuns lived in caverns (yeah, I misheard convent).
Sex happened only at night with married people
The milkman, postman & church organist were the same person
There was a planet with only men & they played all day.
If a bee stung me, I'd die and return as a bee
School teachers and principals never had sex and the males had no penis and the females were like my cousin Elsie's dolls, flat and sexless.
Living in a ditch would keep me safe if the Russians attacked.
Staying under a desk would keep me safe if there was an atomic bomb attack.
President Eisenhower was from outer space
If I got lost the police would take me home to live with them. I didn't think policemen were married.
If I stole the police would put me in an orphanage.
Eating Chinese food would make me a communist.
If a woman kissed you then you were married
Electricity came from kite string.
Meteorites were pieces of coal that God threw at earth when he was angry.

 

[Gillette]

Meteorites were pieces of coal that God threw at earth when he was angry.

That's cute.

My mother was told never to kiss a boy in her bathing suit or she'd get pregnant.

Why would a boy be wearing her bathing suit?

 

[Hoss]

That's cute.

My mother was told never to kiss a boy in her bathing suit or she'd get pregnant.

Why would a boy be wearing her bathing suit?

Liberated cross dresser who envied your mother's taste in swimwear and swiped it.

 

[midlifebear]

Something that I never believed, even though all the adults in my childhood DID believe it was true: getting a blood transfusion from a black person turned you black.

I kid you not. I think my mother still thought this was true until she died. And she had worked her way up through the ranks to be the head administrator of the lab at Ewetaw Valley Hospital until she retired at 65. Some people's parents. Huff!

Oh, and among the lay (all mormons are lay, but they were even more lay in the 50s and 60s) were convinced that if Kennedy were to become President of the United States he would make Catholicism the "official" religion of 'Mericuh. Mind you, this was in middle 'Mericuh Ewetaw where many still believe there are golden plates hidden in the Wasatch Mountains in Ewetaw County. So, because all of my teachers, those with burning testimonies of the gospel at church, and all of my family members thought it was true, I presumed it to be true, too.

On an even uglier note, Hoss brought up something interesting. Right after The Bay of Pigs Incident (look it up), Russia installed ICBMs with nuclear warheads on Cuban soil. All school children from Kindergarten to 12th grades were taught to "tuck, roll, and cover" under your school desk in case a "COMMIE" nuclear bomb exploded. And if you were outside and saw a blinding flash of light you were supposed run and fall into a dry ditch for protection. So, everyone believed it had to be true if you were to survive a nuclear blast. Yeah, right. Actually, it just made it easier for any survivors to create mounds of mass graves or bull doze soil over your cooked ass in a ditch to help keep the spread of disease at a minimum. Ahhh, those were the days.

 

[curious_angel]

My brother and I were convinced that when you passed a cemetery, you had to hold your breathe, otherwise you'd be the next one in it. It wasn't so bad when we were in the car, but in grade two, there was a small graveyard on the route we walked to school! I used to run past it.

This is so cute.:biggrin1:





For me a big misconception was that boys were smelly, loud, boisterous beings. Thankfully, I discovered this to be only partially correct.


Another was that every girl could choose to have breasts, or remain boobless. After much thought, I decided that I would refuse the boobs as they looked heavy to carry around, and would almost certainly hinder my supreme tree climbing and hide-and-seek abilities.

 

[B_lrgeggs]

LMAO...now that's funny

You are the only exception MsThang! Thank you

 

[justmeincal]

I remember going on vacation in the family car. I remember my dad making turn after turn and I was afraid we would never find our way back home. I thought 'how in the world is he ever going to remember to make all the correct turns to get us back home?' I remember thinking that I was never going to see my pony again!

 

[drumstyck]

That's cute.
My mother was told never to kiss a boy in her bathing suit or she'd get pregnant.
Why would a boy be wearing her bathing suit?

last nite i shot an elephant in my pajamas...how he got in my pajamas, ill never know...




i remember as a child, playing with my matchbox cars in the backseat while my parents drove. and when my dad would turn left, i would make the matchbox car turn left, and i couldnt figure out why our car was still going straight even though we were pointed left.

i also had trouble understanding why bridges were angled from far away, but got flat once we were on them.

 

[flame boy]

last nite i shot an elephant in my pajamas...how he got in my pajamas, ill never know...




i remember as a child, playing with my matchbox cars in the backseat while my parents drove. and when my dad would turn left, i would make the matchbox car turn left, and i couldnt figure out why our car was still going straight even though we were pointed left.

i also had trouble understanding why bridges were angled from far away, but got flat once we were on them.

In the same sort of category when I was very young I thought sign posts pointing straight on meant go up in to the sky.

 

[D_Peter Potamus]

I always thought that large breasted women, and very well endowed men were more sexual than other people. I guess that I still have that (mis?) conception. My having a small penis probably plays a role in this.

 

[HiddenLacey]

When it was thundering and lightening God was playing at the bowling alley, so there was no reason to be scared, he was just having a good time.