embarrassing moments with parents

[dave2006]

what is the most embarassing thing a Parent has said to you about your (or their) sex life

My dad told me he's not so much a boob man as he is a butt man. Who wants to know this about their dad?

I was suppose to go fishing with my dad and a buddy of his. I was inside going to the bathroom while they were hooking up the boat and getting things ready. When I finally came down my dad's friend said what did you get lost in there? At which point my dad said no more like (making a jerking motion). They both gave a chuckled while I just wanted to crawl under a rock.

Another incident was hearing my dad argue with my mom that he doesn't get enough sex!

 

[caffecaffe]

I had an embarassing moment when my dad told me to "protect" myself on the finalists trip. And... if i want... he could buy some "protection" for me. And he came with the long story of the risks and so on....so on...
The only thing i said was...yes...yes...ok...huhu...i know...


he didn't knew i had a little more experience than he thought.

 

[Gillette]

No puritans in my house growing up, just me and my mom after the divorce

My mother has told me who her best lover was -TMI
My mother has told me who her worst lover was - TMI
At age 13 I found Penthouse and thought I could get her boyfriend ousted,
(he was an asshole and needed to go) she said they were hers. - OH!
When I asked her if she'd ever given my dad a blow job, despite the answer, "thats none of your business" the cheshire grin said yes.

When she told me that she had broken it off with her fiance BECAUSE he had taken her virginity, I rolled on the floor. Back in the day that was the reason TO get married.

 

[smurfpotter624]

Mine's more embarassing FOR my dad.....

He was talking on the phone with a friend one day when he started laughing really hard.....

Me: "What's so funny?"

Dad: "Just something Carl said."

Me: "What did he say?"

Dad: "We'll go huntin' and shoot us a deer; then, if we're lucky, we'll go shoot us a queer."

Me: *blank stare* "That was cruel."

Dad: "What? They all deserve it anyway."

Me: *gets out of chair, walks up to dad, punches him hard in the gut*

After that he didn't say another word for about a half hour.

So yea..... and people wonder why he's the only one I'm not out to.

 

[Gillette]

That isn't funny at all, I'm sorry to hear that.

I am glad to hear that you are out to everyone else and hope that they are all supportive.

 

[smurfpotter624]

That isn't funny at all, I'm sorry to hear that.

I am glad to hear that you are out to everyone else and hope that they are all supportive.

:hug: Thank you. I have not had a bad experience with coming out. I'm lucky enough to have great friends.

Anyway...

I've been seeing a guy for about a month. The family was planning a short trip up north (Mackinac Island). Me, my Mom, and my Sister are sitting around talking in the living room. My mom, out of the clear blue sky, tells me...

"You can bring your 'Friend' if you'd like."

My Sister and I look at eachother and start laughing. My mom had no idea what to call him.

 

[davidjh7]

Hmmmm-----two incidents come to mind. One, I asked my father what masterbation was, when I was about 10 or 11 (hey--this was before the internet, and the library was in a small conservative city...). He said "Well, you know when your dick gets hard?" I ended the topic RIGHT then!!! Another time, he confessed to me in one of his drunken tirades, that my mother didn;t like sex very much---definately TMI!:tongue:

 

[smurfpotter624]

Another, very recent one...

Last night, my mom said the words "doin' the nasty"... (it was in relation to last night's Grey's Anatomy episode).

I don't think I have ever been more shocked.

 

[EdWoody]

Fun moments at the Christmas dinner table:

"Do you want stuffing, dear?"

 

[joxe]

When I was 14 years old and I began to masturbate, I was once masturbating in the bathroom and dad walked in (I had forgotten to close the door) and when he saw me jacking off, he didn't feel embarrassed at all (I did!) and he only said that I had a big cock (yes, it's 7 inches long and 6 inches in girth) and he began shaving as if masturbation were the most normal thing in the world (of course, I couldn't go on).

 

[OmahaBeef]

My Dad used to bust in on me and my girlfriends back in the day. He knew what he was doing. It was all by design. He wanted to check out the girlfriends. He has seen much more than I was ever comfortable with.

One comment struck me in particular:

"I used to have a cock like yours, but mine has worn down over the years..."

LOL

...OB

 

[B_houugadunor]

My worse experience was when me and my boyfriend were really going at it, when my mother calls to me from downstairs and says "The dogs just shit on the living room carpet and theres blood in it!"

Total passion killer.

 

[D_Herin_Ghan]

I was home for 18 hours this past weekend. No more, no less. Trying to get from State College, PA to long island on a weekend sucks ass.

Mom: You look different..I can't really place it.

Me: I shouldn't, maybe I put on some muscle but I don't think I can get any taller than what I am now (Long running joke in my family since I'm 6'4" and have hit my head on anything and everything imaginable).

Mom: No, I don't think it's that (gee, thanks Mom, I put on 10 lbs of muscle in three months), when you walked over to say hello...you just looked different.

Dad: That's because he's been getting ass twice a week.

Me: Oh shit, I forgot, I gotta go to the pharmacy (Obviously my cue to end the convo)

Mom: DON'T FORGET CONDOMS (as I'm running out the door).

Absolutely humiliating, embarassing, and hysterical.

 

[B_Think_Kink]

The first time (many years ago) I heard my parents having sex... I didn't figure it out till after... but I went and knocked on their door and told them to keep it down.

 

[jordanj]

Apart from my dad discussing erectile problems and his piles over dinner in front of everyone, including my daughter who was aged about 10. No, he's not embarrassing at all! lol

 

[Wonderboy]

I went down one night, into the living room. My mum was sat on the chair, back to me.

My mum's boyfriend's head popped up from the front of the chair, with my mums bra in his teeth!

And although this isn't parental:

On Wednesday night, we were talking about my girlfriend at my aunt's house. My cousin said 'I'll come down and embarrass you and tell her all your secrets'. My aunt said 'yeah, like that snake he has in his bedroom' :redface:

NB: I don't own any reptilian pets.

 

[Rubenesque]

My mother once, in a "we're more like friends than mother/daughter aren't we darling" moments, told me that she shaved her flimflam because her husband doesn't like to get a mouthful of fluff - wayyyyyyyyyyyyy tmi!!!!!!

 

[jordanj]

she shaved her flimflam...

Flimflam. There's a new word for me. :biggrin1:

 

[Rubenesque]

LOL I think I have about 101 words for vagina - flimflam is my current favourite!

 

[Wonderboy]

Ever heard of tuppence? I'm familiar with Flower and Flu-flu...