Guy claiming i'm the reason he's bi

[sambeesley]

I started chatting to this 35 yr old guy. Smart, funny, really gorgeous and strictly religious - he's Muslim. After a while, he admitted that he fancied me and ended up jerking off with me and wants to fuck me next time - he said it was the first time he felt like this about a male. He keeps on texting me saying he thinks about me at night. He was married at 22 - an arranged marriage.
He said he loves me. I later on found out he's married with two kids. Has anyoe else had this? What should happen? I think I should just not talk to him again. I feel really sad that he didn't tell me about his marriage.

 

[briacon429]

I agree.

Honestly, from what you’re describing, I feel bad for both of you. On his end, he’s probably sexually frustrated if he likes guys but has never had a chance to act on it. But it’s also not fair to you to suddenly reveal the wife and kids, because that puts you in an impossible position. Better to step away from the whole situation and let him figure things out for himself.

 

[ManchesterTom]

This scenario happens so often within communities that are tightly controlled by religious and cultural rules.

People in these kinds of cultures are really at risk of losing their family and cultural belonging if they are found out.

I have a young doctor who is my neighbour and who is being pushed towards marriage.

He and I were chatting in the street a while ago and he is not happy about what his expected life path is. He and I have never directly discussed anything to do with sexuality, but he knows that I know that he knows that I know.

The Muslim man whom you met will have so much societal and religious pressure. Who can live like that?

 

[marriedasian]

I think you should let this one go. There's too much baggage here that you probably don't want to deal with from a long-term perspective. The other option is to draw a clear line in the sand and make sure he agrees with that line then just have fun while you still can.

 

[AllieHeidi]

strictly religious - he's Muslim.

Run. Now.

 

[Casiohoe]

Run.

Trust me run.
I'm christian and I dated a Muslim man and he tried to convert me and made me feel so terrible about myself. Tons of red flags

Its not worth it. Run.

 

[heinz.friedrich]

He said he loves me. I later on found out he's married with two kids. Has anyoe else had this? What should happen? I think I should just not talk to him again. I feel really sad that he didn't tell me about his marriage.

No. I have never had this.

He should deal with his marriage and decide what he wants to do first. Obviously he cheated without informing you.

That is also forbidden in his religion except in heaven where the marriage does not count anymore according to a lot of Muslims that believe in 72 virgins.

Run.

Trust me run.
I'm christian and I dated a Muslim man and he tried to convert me and made me feel so terrible about myself. Tons of red flags

Its not worth it. Run.

True.

If he is strictly religious, he will also be cherry picking like every other Muslim.

You cannot follow the religion throroughly, because if you follow specific laws, you will violate other
laws.

Islam is based on so much untruth that is why it is hard for them to convice anyone that is educated and anyone who sees the contradictions with an unbiased eye.

There is also a lot of hypocricy.

They often claim they are against discrimination but seldom distance themselves from the discriminating laws in the Quran.


Also the hate that Mohammed promotes to specific groups like in Surah 60:4 is repulsive. An that is not an exeption. There are a couple of those laws.

Allahs real laws state that you should love and respect other people because that is the example that Allah gave.. Otherwise Allah would not be allloving and allforgiving ( also according to the Quran).

 

[alpha_centauri]

I started chatting to this 35 yr old guy. Smart, funny, really gorgeous and strictly religious - he's Muslim. After a while, he admitted that he fancied me and ended up jerking off with me and wants to fuck me next time - he said it was the first time he felt like this about a male. He keeps on texting me saying he thinks about me at night. He was married at 22 - an arranged marriage.
He said he loves me. I later on found out he's married with two kids. Has anyoe else had this? What should happen? I think I should just not talk to him again. I feel really sad that he didn't tell me about his marriage.

Run far away as fast as you can. Just end it cut off all contact and find out and honest bisexual and gay men to date and sleep with, and who do not play psychological mind games such as claiming that they are "in love" with a casual sex partner who they do not really know, when they are married and have children.

He lied about being single so he will lie about basically everything else.

 

[Raybo Revoy]

I love you is easy to say. Living it is another matter. Let it go! It's a dead end. In some cases, literally!

 

[longstroke7]

OP, please ghost this person for your own wellness and safety.

 

[Brodie888]

Anyone who says they love you and you are the reason for anything at this point in a relationship is a red flag.

But then on top of that you have the baggage of a family and the religion which is a deal breaker.

Life is too short to deal with other people's shit when there's plenty of guys out there who would be equally compatible.

 

[Burghf_er]

I met a young, single Muslim guy in a developing country online. I also was single then. About 18 months later, when I was in his country we met and had sex a few times. I haven't seen him in person since. I told him he should have fun with other men. He said the only man he is attracted to is me. Who knows whether it's true, but it seems doubtful. In any case, he said it. He subsequently got married to a woman and had a child. He seems very happy. I may or may not be back in his country at all, let alone soon. And it's been nine years already and we're now both married, him to a woman and me to a man. He does hope I'll visit but hasn't said or implied anything else.

 

[LilBigWang]

as a non religious person, I would do a 1 time sexual night and then... Delete, Block, Run!

just to say i converted a muslim LOL. Do not take my comment serious. Just stating what I would proly do.

 

[AfterHours69]

To me, this is tough. It’s not as cut and dry. Him coming from a strict religious background complicates things, especially if it’s his first time really dealing with those feelings. Safest choice for you is to not get any further involved. That doesn’t mean it’s the best choice for you, just the least risky. Only you can decide what is good for you.

 

[Ahhh Ha]

Will this man protect you from any wrath coming your way if his people found out? It doesn't sound like he's 100% in control since his family was involved in his marriage.

Hopefully you're aware....a gay homewrecker isn't winning against a group of Muslims. If that man loved you....he wouldn't set you up like this.

 

[Travelerguy]

Get a few fucks out of him and leave. It's not worth it.

 

[deleted18388141]

In the arab or islamic world being gay means being a bottom and anything else is overlooked at!
So guys will do such things! Then say oh it s not me…. It s you they will love you then ghost you easly
So just tell him you aint interested!
Because why would uou engage in someone who s not available

 

[HorseHung40's]

Your "friend" is a manipulator. Run.