I am confused about my sexual orrientation...

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by TADA401, Jul 12, 2010.

  1. TADA401

    TADA401 New Member

    Joined:
    Jan 4, 2010
    Messages:
    151
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    2
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Massachusetts
    As you might see my sexual orrientation stands at 50% straight & 50% gay.
    I really can't figure out what my sexual orrientation is, I need help.
    I get turned on by guys, mostly. Girls a little bit less.
    But then again, I really do have a feeling that I want to start my own family, to have kids, to snuggle and protect a woman. Idk, but for some reason I feel... Happy whenever i think about it?

    I really am a confused mess
     
  2. lvsxy808

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Jun 27, 2006
    Messages:
    2,549
    Albums:
    2
    Likes Received:
    326
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Surbiton (GB)
    You're thinking too hard. Don't worry about it. Let what happens happen.

    Judging by your photos (which, by the way, wow), you're young. You shouldn't be in any rush to define yourself. Enjoy your life free of labels and expectations.

    Have you considered the possibility that you could start a family with a man just as well as with a woman?
     
  3. TADA401

    TADA401 New Member

    Joined:
    Jan 4, 2010
    Messages:
    151
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    2
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Massachusetts
    I have considered about having a family with a man but Idk... It's just different from it being with a woman...
     
  4. Riven650

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Apr 29, 2006
    Messages:
    1,620
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    21
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Norfolk UK
    So, is the confusion about your sexual orientation, ie. 'am I straight or am I gay?', or is it about 'I fancy both sexes, why can't I have both?'.


    So, regarding your orientation: You are bisexual. You might eventually settle down with a girl and start a family. In the meantime have fun and be careful.

    I'm happily married, but it doesn't stop me from being attracted to other women. (I don't think it's really any different to being happily married and being attracted to other women and men.) I sometimes find it 'confusing' when I come across someone I really fancy and know I mustn't. I just mustn't!
     
  5. D_Ernie_Eatsit

    D_Ernie_Eatsit New Member

    Joined:
    Mar 15, 2007
    Messages:
    28
    Likes Received:
    0
    I feel exactly the same as you haha.. It sucks cuz ik I'm more turned on by men but I honestly think I would be happier with a woman.. And I cnt really c myself happy being with a guy longterm
     
  6. TADA401

    TADA401 New Member

    Joined:
    Jan 4, 2010
    Messages:
    151
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    2
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Massachusetts
    You have a point...
    Thanks, dude!
     
  7. TADA401

    TADA401 New Member

    Joined:
    Jan 4, 2010
    Messages:
    151
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    2
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Massachusetts
    Yeah, me too. Lol
     
  8. BiItalianBro

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Oct 22, 2006
    Messages:
    1,246
    Likes Received:
    11
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Chicago & Louisville KY
    My advise to you is do not rush to put a moniker on yourself. Sexuality is a dynamic thing..over the course of ones life, your tastes and attractions will change. Bank on that. I was married for nine years to a wonderful woman and we have two great kids...even tho we are not married now, she is my best friend. The key is to be honest with people (M or F) about your orientation.
     
  9. coachreffn

    coachreffn Active Member

    Joined:
    Oct 30, 2009
    Messages:
    127
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    69
    Location:
    California
    Yeah, I would put the word CONFUSION on the back burner. Focus on getting your life in order and set up so that you can have that family life (regardless of male or female partner). Get to school, do well, train for a good job and enjoy life. Have a variety of interests and curiosities about life..not just about sexuality. Funny how when we focus on other aspects of life that the CONFUSION we feel about our sexuality and our vocation in life seems to sort of be put in proper perspective. Enjoy your youth...prepare for adulthood and family...
     
  10. TADA401

    TADA401 New Member

    Joined:
    Jan 4, 2010
    Messages:
    151
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    2
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Massachusetts
    I should prepare for that stage of my life...
    Thanks man for the advice, I appreciate it.
     
  11. takeyourmark

    takeyourmark Member

    Joined:
    Oct 21, 2008
    Messages:
    138
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    3
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Australia
    i feel the same way too. i'm attracted to men and women but i can't see myself having an emotional connection with a man.
     
  12. LGX

    LGX Member

    Joined:
    Aug 29, 2007
    Messages:
    605
    Likes Received:
    23
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    St Louis (MO, US)
    Question, where you ever sexually abused? Just wondering...trying to figure something out.

    But it's normal to feel that way. It's like how straight guys say "I love my wife, but I got this cold one on the side...". Sexually, having sex with another guy can be much different than with a woman. I think guys tend to be more raw, so there isn't a lot you can't do. A guy might take your load in his mouth faster than a woman because he doesn't tie emotions to sex.

    You know, the Greeks did this. I like women emotionally, too. They are compassionate in a way that men can't be. I want to take care of a woman. Sure, you can do that with a guy but it's different. There is NO SUBSTITUTE for having your seed growing inside a woman.
     
  13. Corius

    Corius New Member

    Joined:
    Mar 1, 2007
    Messages:
    718
    Likes Received:
    6
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Michigan
    In my time all of us young guys were programmed to think of ourselves as "regular guys" and we had some idea of what regular guys did. When two "regular guys". the new guy in town and myself, bonded as friends we found ourselves becoming more than just friends. That's when the sex happened and we found it to be one of the best things to come into our lives.

    But, when he was away the summer after ouf junor year, we were both free to be attentive to the girls. I was absolutely enchanted by a summer of getting up close and very intimate with a girl I had known all my life. I assumed my discovery was also something regular guys did.

    I still think of myself as a "regular guy" and am grateful that I have tasted of the joys of sexual relationship on both sides of my sexualtiy. I have had few partners in sex (three males and three females) but when I met the woman who has been my wife for many years I seemed to know somehow that this was the one person I was eager and willing to spend the rest of my life with. Fortunately, she was similarly minded toward me.

    Be prepared for the boons that come into your life. I have a hunch that you, like a lot of us bi fellows, will make your choice when that special person comes into your life.
     
    #13 Corius, Jul 12, 2010
    Last edited: Jul 12, 2010
  14. SuperSizedBalls

    SuperSizedBalls Active Member

    Joined:
    Aug 23, 2008
    Messages:
    123
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    35
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    So. California
    I once shared these same concerns about a long term male-male relationship, and then I woke up one morning and realized that I'd been in a committed relationship with the same man for thirty one years. I wonder how THAT happened? :smile:
     
  15. B_RedDude

    B_RedDude New Member

    Joined:
    Jun 30, 2007
    Messages:
    2,031
    Likes Received:
    1
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    California
    This may sound pat, but you might think about eventually settling down with a bisexual woman who understands your attractions and who wants a family too.
     
  16. D_Cowboy Coitus

    D_Cowboy Coitus New Member

    Joined:
    Jun 6, 2010
    Messages:
    49
    Likes Received:
    0
    With a body and cock like that please always play with men :)

    On a serious not do whatever you feel comfotable doing - so long as you do me haha
     
  17. Frodo46888

    Frodo46888 Active Member

    Joined:
    May 11, 2010
    Messages:
    608
    Likes Received:
    125
    Gender:
    Male
    Sexual orientation is on a continuum, from 100% straight to 100% gay, with few of us at either extreme. In truth, most of us are at least a little "bisexual". Don't be quick to fasten one of these labels on yourself, and don't allow labels to control your behavior. It takes some people until they're fifty before they figure it all out.
     
  18. tachyon

    tachyon New Member

    Joined:
    May 2, 2007
    Messages:
    328
    Albums:
    3
    Likes Received:
    2
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    New York City
    your just daze and confuse that's why there is a middle. Its called Bi.. :p
     
  19. oddeyeblu

    oddeyeblu Member

    Joined:
    Jun 19, 2010
    Messages:
    140
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Kansas City
    Most call it Bi I call it human. I don't care how straight a man claims to be he can never escape from his cock and all the pleasure it has to offer.
     
  20. B_orleandersee

    B_orleandersee New Member

    Joined:
    Jul 9, 2010
    Messages:
    48
    Likes Received:
    1
    I haven't read through all of the replies though I'm sure a lot of them are interesting.. I'd just like to touch on the 'family' aspect of it because I'm sure a lot of people feel that way too (I don't believe I'm one of them).

    I think that partly, it's upbringing, society and your mentality.. maybe you're seeking something that will bring you comfort and thinking of a mom or a dad or hell, every single couple you see when you turn on your tv or go online (*let's face it, gay couples on the big screen are a rarity) are a male and a female.. i think you oughta give it more thought as to why it is that you feel that you need that in order to be happy.. is it just automatic thinking or is it something you want?

    never would i suggest creating a family solely out of fear. there are lots of responsibilities that come along with it so just the same, never avoid making one either just because of fear..

    you need to be truthful with yourself.. and if all else fails, there are polyamorous relationships and some of those go quite well.
     
Draft saved Draft deleted