Interesting hook up

[B_starinvestor]

Soooooo

Went to happy hour around 5:00 yesterday at a trendy bar/restaurant...got nice and tuned up...anyway, starting chatting up this girl, guess she works in retail blah blah blah.

One thing leads to another...after a little drama with her girlfriends she winds up going home with me around 1:00 a.m.

No kidding - top 2 or 3 sets of tits I've ever seen in my life. I mean, unbelievable. So I smack those around for a few minutes, then I go down to take her panties off and.....



Biggest fucking bush I've ever seen in my life! I mean, it looked like she had a wig in her crotch.

I'm like, 'what the fuck is this? It looks like a fucking shrub?' Jezuz!! No way I'm going in there. It would be like sticking your head in a spruce tree.

She says, 'well, i haven't dated anyone since August so I just let it go.' Let it go? Have you been watering and fertilizing it?

Fuck. I mean it is 2009. I could see if it was 1972 but holy schnikeees.

Wow. Well anyway, due to a high alcohol content it took me a rather long time to, eh, finish up. But she's doing kinda different stuff like smacking me, squeezing my neck, lots of noises, etc.

Afterwards, I say, what do you like...what get's you going, etc.? She says, "I need you to pull my hair, smack me hard, really fuck me as hard as you can. I like to be in pain when I''m fucking.

Yowza. Great tits and she's into all that. So fucking cool.

That bush has got to go though.:biggrin1:

 

[B_Nick8]

Sometimes you remind me of Hemingway.

 

[nudeyorker]

Thanks for sharing!

 

[B_starinvestor]

Sometimes you remind me of Hemingway.

Thanks


Jerk

 

[D_Gunther Snotpole]

Cross of Henry Miller and Mickey Spillane, leaning heavy on the Spillane.
('Crotch wig' ... niiiiiiiiiiice.)

Nice tweet.

 

[HazelGod]

Nice tweet.

You do realize that no straight man "tweets," right? :wink:

 

[Gl3nn]

Did you create this thread to show us you don't have to pay for sex?

Oh no...my mistake. You didn't pay for sex...you just gave her 300$.

 

[D_Ireonsyd_Colonrinse]

starinvestor writes:

No kidding - top 2 or 3 sets of tits I've ever seen in my life. I mean, unbelievable. So I smack those around for a few minutes, then I go down to take her panties off and.....





--------------------

Damn. When I saw that "", I thought for sure you were going to say her dick was bigger than yours.


I don't mean to get too dollar-book Freud on you starman, but the leitmotif of booze runs like a river through your posts. - In fact between the booze, wild politics and black-eyed, fat-lipped hookers that show up on your doorstep, reading your adventures is coming perilously close to watching a reality show celebrity booze it up, slur his phrases, get involved in weird kinky sex, then stagger around the house until he finally passes out.

 

[nudeyorker]

starinvestor writes:

No kidding - top 2 or 3 sets of tits I've ever seen in my life. I mean, unbelievable. So I smack those around for a few minutes, then I go down to take her panties off and.....





--------------------

Damn. When I saw that "", I thought for sure you were going to say her dick was bigger than yours.


I don't mean to get too dollar-book Freud on you starman, but the leitmotif of booze runs like a river through your posts. - In fact between the booze, wild politics and black-eyed, fat-lipped hookers that show up on your doorstep, reading your adventures is coming perilously close to watching a reality show celebrity booze it up, slur his phrases, get involved in weird kinky sex, then stagger around the house until he finally passes out.

Well that puts a new slant on it...I'll start reading more carefully!

 

[D_Jared Padalicki]

Hahaha, sometimes you have to take things to get more! hahaha. You are on a discovery down there!

 

[vince]

"Thread move on Aisle three!!"

 

[goodwood]

LMAO!

 

[B_Nick8]

Cross of Henry Miller and Mickey Spillane, leaning heavy on the Spillane.
('Crotch wig' ... niiiiiiiiiiice.)

Nice tweet.

The word he's looking for is "merkin", Rubes. Or in star's case more specifically, a-merkin.

 

[D_Gunther Snotpole]

You do realize that no straight man "tweets," right? :wink:

Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

The word he's looking for is "merkin", Rubes. Or in star's case more specifically, a-merkin.

But he's trying (in so many ways).
And he can't even spell Jebuz.
Jebuz.

 

[larocca]

"Have you been watering and fertilizing it?"

Hahahahahahahahahhaha.

 

[B_Nick8]

But he's trying (in so many ways).
.

You needn't enumerate. In fact, please don't.

 

[D_Gunther Snotpole]

You needn't enumerate. In fact, please don't.

Don't worry.
Four fingers and three toes ... but beyond seven, they're all high numbers.

 

[Wish-4-8]

Well at least she knew she let it grow, implying that she does trim the hedges at one point.

 

[B_Nick8]

][/size]
Four fingers and three toes ...

I said "please".

 

[vergax]

Soooooo

Went to happy hour around 5:00 yesterday at a trendy bar/restaurant...got nice and tuned up...anyway, starting chatting up this girl, guess she works in retail blah blah blah.

One thing leads to another...after a little drama with her girlfriends she winds up going home with me around 1:00 a.m.

No kidding - top 2 or 3 sets of tits I've ever seen in my life. I mean, unbelievable. So I smack those around for a few minutes, then I go down to take her panties off and.....

I thought for that paused moment that you had a close encounter with a trans there!