buddy629
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is it wrong to ask a partner to sign a prenup?
- Thread starter D_Maurice Mountlilly
- Start date
D_Etienne Neerdowell
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Someone hurt you badly in the past either that or you have some serious trust issues.
Tell me this why would you bother to get married, why not just live together as partners?
The reason why the divorce rate is so high is primarily because a lot of young people rush to marry because they thing that's what they should do with their life.
We should be teaching people to think more about the consequences of marriage and what marriage should mean.
I myself think marriage is an out-dated concept but I believe that if your going to sign up for it you need to be committed to trying to make it work. For this to be the case I think a couple need to each other really well and in my opinion this is very rarely the case with young people.
Bbucko
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Prenups are a pragmatic response to the reality that people change. Take it from some one who's been in four relationships that involved complete asset sharing (including joint bank accounts): people change in ways no one could have expected at the beginning of the relationship.
Oh, and people lie a lot, too. There's nothing quite like a legal document to keep one's mind focused on reality and truth. But, again, I've always copped to having deplorably shitty taste in men, and I haven't always been an angel, either.
curioustitan
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I would say it is something to consider.
When I was engaged...i wanted a prenup for future inheritance and future children in the event of divorce or if something happened to me and i wasn't around to care for my children. I secretly hoped that if we ever had children and I passed away or something, that my parents would split custody with my fiance, so that my influence was still there.
the more i thought about this, the more i realized how obvious it was that we weren't meant to be together. if i ever do find someone to spend my life and have a family with, i will wait for someone who i trust enough to not have the fear of what will happen if i am gone. not sure if this makes sense.
When I was engaged...i wanted a prenup for future inheritance and future children in the event of divorce or if something happened to me and i wasn't around to care for my children. I secretly hoped that if we ever had children and I passed away or something, that my parents would split custody with my fiance, so that my influence was still there.
the more i thought about this, the more i realized how obvious it was that we weren't meant to be together. if i ever do find someone to spend my life and have a family with, i will wait for someone who i trust enough to not have the fear of what will happen if i am gone. not sure if this makes sense.
Good advice. I clicked on the thread to say exactly what you did in your first sentence.
Sometimes relationships that both parties really think will work-out do not, and, irrespective of who had what in the beginning, things are a lot less complicated in the aftermaths of relationships with pre-nuptual agreements. I would add, although this may be obvious, that you should consult with a lawyer as to what the substance of any pre-nup should be rather than using a website's template or something of that nature.
cdog204
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I would never get married without signing a prenup first. I'm a romantic, but I'm realistic as well. There is no way that I would want to be putting half or more of my assets in play in the very statistically likely event that the marriage won't work out. I have seen vast fortunes squandered on messy divorces where the only parties to benefit are the attorneys, and I don't want to go down that path.
A prenup is simply an easy exit; it is a document that says, "If in the event that this marriage doesn't work out for X,Y, or Z reasons, here is what we will do and have a nice day." I think that it actually shows a great degree of consideration for the other party to the marriage because it says, "Hey, if for whatever reason this doesn't work out we're not going to go into some awful drawn-out court thing, it will just end in this simple way."
A prenup is simply an easy exit; it is a document that says, "If in the event that this marriage doesn't work out for X,Y, or Z reasons, here is what we will do and have a nice day." I think that it actually shows a great degree of consideration for the other party to the marriage because it says, "Hey, if for whatever reason this doesn't work out we're not going to go into some awful drawn-out court thing, it will just end in this simple way."
I wouldn't marry somebody without signing a prenup. The agreement provides clarity about who owns what, and what the expectations are.
Enid
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B_subgirrl
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I wouldn't have a problem with signing a pre-nup. And I'm certainly never going to be the one with the money.
wallyj84
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B_curiousme01
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curioustitan
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You wouldn't possibly be talking about Sir Branson would you?:biggrin1:
Bbucko
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This is how I feel. If I'm thinking about getting married and I'm concerned about protecting myself from the person that I'm marrying, then I'm not going to get married. If we break up, we both walk away with our own assets protected. Simple.
I guess I just don't understand what is meaningful about a marriage that is "protected" by a prenup, unless the person that you're marrying is significantly wealthier than you are, and even then, aren't you just living together like boyfriend and girlfriend? Is it something that you do just to have the fun of wearing a white dress and a tuxedo at a wedding?
Does it have something to do with a stigma about not being married? Why don't more people just stay single?
D_Etienne Neerdowell
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You hit the nail on the head. Marriage has developed into a social convention whereby single people are in some way seen as odd, and to be single is seen to be a misfit in some way.
B_jeepguy2
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A prenup is really not worth the paper that it is written on. A better option is to put all of your assets like real estate, stock portfolio, and vehicles into a revocable trust that you own. That way if you end up in divorce court you technically don't own all those assets that are in the trust...the trust owns them. Since you technically don't own them she and her lawyer can't touch them.
That advice to "never buy anything that flies, floats, or fucks is damn good advice!" Airplanes, boats, and women are very expensive and costly to maintain. LOL
That advice to "never buy anything that flies, floats, or fucks is damn good advice!" Airplanes, boats, and women are very expensive and costly to maintain. LOL
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