Sensitive cock, wanting to top again.

[FitCollegeDude]

I'm versatile and love to top as well, but mostly bottomed for a while now because it means I don't cum as fast, which I always hate. When I cum early, my sex drive is usually completely gone. On the other hand, I love being edged and at the beginning I'm always sensitive and could cum immediately, but after a certain point I can last for a long time. That's usually when I felt confident fucking my ex-partner, but usually his hole was too tight and I came quickly.
I think when I started bottoming more, my cock wasn't used to his tight hole anymore and made me cum quickly whenever I tried fucking him. Because at the beginning of the relationships I had some nice sessions fucking him. Never pounding, because he didn't like it and obviously made me cum fast.

It has been difficult on Grindr since most look for tops or bottoms and not vers guys. I've always been honest about my problem and most weren't interested after that. Recently, I found a guy who seems interested, but haven't met him yet. I have a feeling if I have a nice hole to fuck, my cock can get used to the feeling again. Especially if it's an understanding vers guy.

Now, the questions is. What can I do on my own? More edging, less jerking off, a tight Fleshlight? I always hoped edging would increase my stamina. Recently, also started with the PC muscle exercises again.

But yeah, at the moment, I really don't feel confident fucking a guy.​

 

[Stephenmass]

@FitCollegeDude Some guys simply cum fast when they are topping. I do think potentially you may have cum in your own opinion much too fast when you had an encounter with someone. The next time you tried you remember the last time before it and anticipate it will happen again. So it does. I think in many cases it's a mindset and after awhile you avoid topping because "it happened again". Most of the time, on round two if you are up for it, will take longer and the same with any subsequent rounds. Or it could be PE (premature ejaculation). A good urologist or sex therapist may be able to help you. It could be something as simple as "your mindset" OR learning to not get overstimulated or overexcited before entering someone, etc. There are a lot of "what if I try this?" or feelings of why is this happening to me, etc. Your brain wants to fuck the hell out of someone, your dick doesn't cooperate. Don't feel defeated. It's a very common problem and one that can be overcome.

 

[FitCollegeDude]

@FitCollegeDude Some guys simply cum fast when they are topping. I do think potentially you may have cum in your own opinion much too fast when you had an encounter with someone. The next time you tried you remember the last time before it and anticipate it will happen again. So it does. I think in many cases it's a mindset and after awhile you avoid topping because "it happened again". Most of the time, on round two if you are up for it, will take longer and the same with any subsequent rounds. Or it could be PE (premature ejaculation). A good urologist or sex therapist may be able to help you. It could be something as simple as "your mindset" OR learning to not get overstimulated or overexcited before entering someone, etc. There are a lot of "what if I try this?" or feelings of why is this happening to me, etc. Your brain wants to fuck the hell out of someone, your dick doesn't cooperate. Don't feel defeated. It's a very common problem and one that can be overcome.

Thanks for your advice

 

[Stephenmass]

Thanks for your advice

Feel free to write me here if you ever want to talk more about it. No judgment zone here.

 

[FitCollegeDude]

Yeah, I'll update this once I've had some more practical experience again

 

[odave]

Something that has worked for me, is longer oral foreplay. Have your partner suck your cock. . .play with it, lick it. . .starting and stopping over and over again. . .this will help to desensitize you. Try to focus on something else so that you don't blow during foreplay. Frequent stopping and starting usually works pretty well. You could also try whacking off an hour or two before sex. . .if you're like most guys, it should take you longer to cum the second time. Some ed meds also help to desensitize your penis. If all else fails, you could try the SSRI, dapoxetine. It is often prescribed for premature ejaculation.

 

[FitCollegeDude]

Something that has worked for me, is longer oral foreplay. Have your partner suck your cock. . .play with it, lick it. . .starting and stopping over and over again. . .this will help to desensitize you. Try to focus on something else so that you don't blow during foreplay. Frequent stopping and starting usually works pretty well. You could also try whacking off an hour or two before sex. . .if you're like most guys, it should take you longer to cum the second time. Some ed meds also help to desensitize your penis. If all else fails, you could try the SSRI, dapoxetine. It is often prescribed for premature ejaculation.

Longer oral foreplay sounds nice

 

[Stephenmass]

You may as well let him get you off as well so when you do fuck him, you've already cum once!

 

[FitCollegeDude]

I think I should get into the habit of cumming more often during sex, instead of just loving the feeling of being edged, and cumming buckets.

 

[Stephenmass]

I think I should get into the habit of cumming more often during sex, instead of just loving the feeling of being edged, and cumming buckets.

Nothing wrong with buckets!! LOL

 

[FitCollegeDude]

I had a positive experience with Durex Extra Safe, as they're slightly thicker. Could definitely fuck much longer as opposed to without a condom. Bottom was used to being fucked hard, so I still had to take a few breaks to fulfil his wish.