I think I have a very long but very scary story to tell about a weird fetish I actually encountered with a feeder that I think tops everything else mentioned so far. In fact, I found the situation so disturbing that it’s still somewhat difficult for me to write or talk about it, even though it happened many years ago now. It just chills my blood to this day. Ultimately I ended up very gradually breaking off the relationship as a result of this really creepy fetish and fantasy my feeder told me he had about me after being his regular cocksucker for almost a year. It was a feeder I gave very regular blowjobs to throughout my senior year of college. I was giving on average about 4 to 5 blowjobs per week to him throughout most of my senior year, as well as giving very regular blowjobs to several other guys at that time. So I was very sexually active as a cocksucker during my senior year of college. I encountered a feeder who ended up having an intense snuff fetish about me.
Now I absolutely loved my relationship with this feeder as his cocksucker. He had a beautiful and thick cut penis with a large mushroom head that I could happily worship for hours on end. He also had very large loads of sweet tasting cum that I loved as a cum whore. He regularly indulged me with the slutty things that I love to do with my cum fetish. So in many ways he was an absolutely perfect feeder for me. That made breaking off our relationship due to his creepy fetish and fantasy very hard for me to do. I still miss sucking his beautiful cock, and taking his delicious cum loads to this day.
As I’ve mentioned before in other posts, many people have told me that I’m a guy who looks very attractive in turtleneck shirts and sweaters. Many have told me that turtlenecks are simply a fashion that physically really suits me, and that makes me look very attractive. Sexually some of my feeders have told me that seeing me frequently wearing turtlenecks really suited me in their opinion, because they thought that some turtlenecks actually me look like a quintessential male cocksucker. Some feeders have told me that turtlenecks are definitely an attractive look on me, but are also a “very gay look” sexually that in their opinion just screamed out to them that I was a beta male cocksucker. So as a cocksucker I have to admit that I’ve honestly become addicted to wearing turtlenecks during the cooler time of year, because wearing a lot of turtlenecks over the years has actually helped me in attracting quite a few feeders to me. As a cocksucker I’m always more than happy to do things that help attract feeders to me, and things that help get me more dick to suck!
So the feeder with the very creepy and scary fetish often asked me to give him blowjobs wearing very tight turtleneck collars. Fortunately super tight collars with turtlenecks have never bothered me at all. I found myself thinking that maybe he had a kinky thing for cocksuckers giving him blowjobs in tight collars. That’s actually not an unusual thing for me to encounter as a cocksucker and turtleneck lover. I’ve ran into other feeders over the years who actually got aroused seeing me suck dick while wearing super tight turtleneck collars around my throat. I suppose that maybe it’s a very mild form of bondage and sexual dominance over a cocksucker like me.
I honestly didn’t think to question why my feeder wanted that turtleneck request, since many people have told me that I look attractive in turtlenecks. I just automatically assumed that he wanted me to give him blowjobs in tight turtlenecks, because he thought that I looked attractive in them, or that maybe he had a kink about cocksuckers wearing tight collars while giving a blowjob as some other feeders that I had encountered. Now fast forward to June and July after I had just graduated from college. Even on hot days during the summer my feeder would still demand that I bring a tight turtleneck shirt or sweater over to his apartment to put on just before I started giving him a blowjob. I actually didn’t mind doing that for him, since I absolutely loved being his cocksucker slut so much. I’m normally a cocksucker who is honestly very eager to please and accommodate my feeder’s demands without asking many questions in return. So after nearly an entire summer of doing this very regularly with most of the blowjobs that I gave him I finally asked him about it. I told him that I’ve never had anyone else demand that I suck dick with turtlenecks on even in the summertime.
A long story short, he told me that he had a huge snuff fetish and fantasy about me. Now as I mentioned before, I was still very naïve sexually for my first few years as a cocksucker, despite being very sexually active at that time. At that time I had absolutely no clue whatsoever about what he meant by a snuff fetish. So I had to ask him a lot of questions about what he meant. Believe me, in retrospect I wish that I hadn’t even bothered to ask!
My feeder had a strange but intense fascination with beheading snuff fantasies, especially with the guillotine. So let’s just say that when I was giving him blowjobs he was very sexually aroused by the thought of me literally giving him head in more ways than one! My feeder knew that I was well read in French history, particularly about the French Revolution. I’m kind of a self taught history nerd. So he often asked me a lot of questions involving what I knew about the French Revolution. However, it eventually dawned upon me that our historical discussions would always circle back to a conservation about the guillotine.
I began to think it was a little odd when he brought up multiple discussions about the guillotine, even at times I was busy giving him a blowjob. I began thinking to myself; “Why is he thinking about the guillotine when I’m busy giving him a blowjob, and being a slut for his cum?” However, there was never anything overtly sexual in our historical discussions, at least anything that was obvious to me. It was honestly just a historical based discussion. I never once thought his talk about the guillotine was ever really disturbing. So of course I couldn’t believe it when he told me that he literally had a fetish and sexual fantasy that involved chopping off my head!
Now here’s the two most disturbing things of all. He told me that he loved seeing me in turtlenecks, because seeing me in turtlenecks actually made it easier for him to imagine what my severed head would actually look like as a sexual trophy. What really frightened me was that he actually made the comment that “I had a very pretty blonde head for the guillotine.”
I was honestly in a state of complete shock after hearing those two comments about my head, and I was nearly at a loss for words. That last comment really chilled me to the core! I decided that I still needed to complete this blowjob, since I could tell that he already close to cumming. So despite feeling very creeped out, I finished the blowjob and swallowed his cum with as much enthusiasm as I could muster at that point.
After the blowjob, I told him that I’ve heard other people make numerous sexual comments about my head. I told him that other people had told me that they absolutely loved my head for reasons that involved my head giving them oral sex. I told him that other feeders had told me that I have a very pretty or incredibly hot looking head when I have a big cock in my mouth. Many feeders have told me that I have a pretty or attractive face for giving blowjobs, or that I had a pretty face when my face was completely drenched in fresh cum. I mentioned how my first feeder who turned me into a cocksucker said that for the rest of my life sex for me was having my head impaled on another man’s cock. He said that I would be absolutely miserable with my sex life unless my head was very regularly impaled on another man’s cock. (Incidentally he was 100% correct about that comment.) However, I told him that I’ve never been told anything by anyone else about having my head chopped off! He tried to downplay it by saying that it was just a sexual fantasy that got him off when I gave him blowjobs.
I ended up going home about 15 minutes after finishing my blowjob. I just felt totally creeped out about the whole incident on my drive back home. I most definitely didn’t sleep well at all that night after just being told by my favorite feeder at that time that I had “a very pretty blonde head for the guillotine.” So I began thinking about how I could break off this relationship. In the end I decided to still give him blowjobs, but very gradually back off on the frequency of me giving him head, and gradually coming up with new excuses for being busy. Now that I knew that my feeder was kind of a mental case, I didn’t want to just suddenly stop things after he revealed this sick fantasy to me. The thought briefly entered my mind that could even be dangerous. Although I didn’t think that my feeder was actually capable of violence, such as actually trying to murder me by chopping off my head. Over time I became completely convinced that this was just a very weird and disturbing sexual fantasy. I even briefly entertained the idea that I could embrace or actually submit myself to this beheading fantasy, since I’m normally a cocksucker who is very eager to please his feeders with almost anything. Of course I quickly decided that I could never actually embrace a fantasy about having my head chopped off on the guillotine.
So that’s what I did to very gradually break off the relationship. It was extremely hard for me to sexually get into giving him blowjobs when I knew that he was literally watching my head giving him a blowjob, and getting off sexually about the idea of chopping my head off on a guillotine. I did the best I could to still be enthusiastic when giving him blowjobs. Fortunately my idea about breaking off the relationship worked successfully after several months of very gradually winding down our relationship by giving him less and less blowjobs.
So that’s what I did to very gradually break off the relationship. It was extremely hard for me to sexually get into giving him blowjobs when I knew that he was literally watching my head giving him a blowjob, and getting off sexually about the idea of chopping my head off on a guillotine. I did the best I could to still be enthusiastic when giving him blowjobs. Fortunately my idea about breaking off the relationship worked successfully after several months of very gradually winding down our relationship by giving him less and less blowjobs.
Years later I ended up looking up information about snuff fantasies, in particular about beheadings, strictly out of my own curiosity after my past experience came to mind. Well I quickly learned that unfortunately this is a popular fantasy for a much larger number of people than I ever would have imagined. There’s rather large internet communities and websites where people express these types of sexual fantasies involving snuffing their sexual partners. I found some of these snuff decapitation fantasies to range from being mildly disturbing but kind of kinky fantasies to some that were downright disturbing and very graphic, such as what chopping off a person’s head would actually look like in real life. There was even some necrophilia fantasies involving freshly severed heads. As a cocksucker I have to admit that I found the images and drawings involving fellatio with severed heads to definitely be extremely disturbing. It’s disconcerting to me as a cocksucker that I could possibly encounter another feeder who would actually think of me that way.
