An older guy

[dc9]

I have nothing against those who do find relationships with that large of an age gap, but there's almost a double generation gap in that (depending on when the parents have kids that is), and it's just not something I could see myself going for. I guess gross is a bad word to use when I refer to that, as I don't quite mean it like that. At first I felt like I was being criminalized for the specific words I said, but I did ask for your opinions.

And honestly I think some guys who are in their 50's and 60's are actually pretty hot, but I couldn't find myself being involved with someone who's that much older than me.

Now I can sleep tonite. LOL
Good luck man.

 

[michaang]

Haha, thanks. Another thing is that having sex with someone is more personal to me, I can't just go and screw some random guy and be happy. Which is why if we did anything, I'd feel bad because I'd end up having mixed feelings about breaking into his relationship and probably developing my own. I obviously like him, but I don't love him (yet?), and this situation would just end up getting more complicated with his boyfriend involved. If it ever comes to it like it almost did today, I'll probably end up telling him no because of the guilt, or I may just flat out tell him how I feel about it regardless.

 

[michaang]

Well a little update; I talked with Max on AIM last night and he asked me if I felt awkward with him spending so much time with him. I told him that I didn't want to cause problems with his boyfriend and that I think he's a great friend and I like to spend time with him, but I don't want it to rattle his relationship because of me. He understands and agrees with me, said we'll talk about it on Wednesday after he gets back from New Orleans (they went on a trip to NO for the weekend).

On another note, my straight best friend I fell in love with in High school (who I'll name Dan, again for respectful discretion) ended up chatting with me on the phone last night. I haven't talked to him in almost 6 months, so we ended up getting some food and catching up on what's been going on with our lives. Apparently his girlfriend hates me because Dan told her that I'm gay, although I barely know her at all, she just knows I was good friends wit him. Her reasoning is that I'm going to hit on him (ironic, since I did in high school along with accusing him of being gay and that almost ruined our friendship, but we overcame that) and she doesn't want me near him. So as soon as he picked me up and I got in his truck last night, he told me "if anyone asks, you're <insert other friend's name here>".

I guess Dan's a bit like me in the sense that he wants to maintain healthy relationships in all directions without any sign of problems. Our continued friendship is also a secret from his parents, as the fact that I'm gay and what happened between us utters greet disapproval and hate. He tries very hard to keep our friendship alive without pissing off the rest of the people who are close to him, which is admirable and in some ways kinda weird, but I only say that because I don't know why he does it after the events between us.

 

[DC_DEEP]

I'd still feel kinda weird if we did anything, even if they do have an open relationship. I'm not sure how couples go into agreement on that.

Sounds like, for a lot of reasons, Max is not the guy for you. You should probably move on, and find someone more suited to you.

 

[dc9]

Move on , they're someone just waiting for you.
Keep us posted.

 

[michaang]

Not much has gone on lately, however the other day Max told me that he's planned to move out in December and end their broken relationship. Said he's got some priorities to take care of until then. Either Austin or Dallas is where he'll move - currently in Arlington. From what I've learned, he doesn't own the house; his boyfriend's parents do, and he's paying for half the mortgage. Thought I'd update you guys.

 

[houtx48]

0lder guy 38.....lolllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll stop you i can't breath

 

[michaang]

I fail to see the amusement.

 

[killerb]

all I can say is, any type of relationship that requires deception & secrecy is not good for you...that goes for this Max thing as well as the Dan thing...

as you get older, you will realize that you deserve to be with someone who won't want to hide his true feelings for you or keep your relationship in the closet...

regarding the age thing, it's really just a number...don't get caught up in worrying about what others may think...

 

[Industrialsize]

I agree, stay away, sexual tension is one thing, guilt is another if you carry it.

Without being rude Auron, maybe you are not ready for any grown up relationships,
your comments like (guys in 50's/60s etc... thats just gross) and (even if you call me a freak for having an interest in a guy thats twice my age).

Very strange remarks, although i am not in any of those age ranges, i respect people who are, we all get to that age at one point even you mate.

Here here....50 is just a few years away for me, and i consider myself in NO WAY to be gross...

 

[michaang]

That's not what I meant, just meant the age difference just wouldn't work out, but I guess I'll be cursed for as long as this thread exists for saying that. My apologies.

 

[michaang]

Well this weekend Max's boyfriend decided for no reason to talk shit about him at a party; their relationship is completely gone now. Max is now looking for a place to move (his boyfriend's parents own the house, more story involved in that).