Just re-read my post from 4/28 - hilarious, if I dare say so myself. So glad I have these memories and the journals to bring back all of the details.
Announcing orgasm
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- Tuka,
I know this is an old thread, but what the hell...
Do you tell your partner you're cumming?
Yes. Actually, due to the type of relationship I'm in (my husband is a Dominant, I'm a submissive), we have established some rules, and one of them is that I have to ask and be granted permission before I come. He almost never, ever says "no," just because it's so mean! But when he does, all stimulation has to stop. If the stimulation kept going I would come anyway -- I wouldn't be able to help it. I just don't have that much control in holding off an orgasm once I reach the brink.
Do you feel compelled to do so, or is it simply part of talking dirty?
Hmm. Thinking of my past (non BDSM) relationships, I almost never announced it. A partner who is familiar with me (and I've never climaxed with an unfamiliar partner) will know the unmistakable breathing pattern, facial expressions, and body tightening that happens to me just before I come. It's pretty obvious, so no, I never felt compelled to announce it.
Does he/she tell you? Do you dig it, or do you find it off-putting?
My husband sometimes tells me, and sometimes doesn't. He's like me in that when he's approaching orgasm, the signs are pretty unmistakable. Sometimes he announces it if we've been fucking for a long time, I think just to let me know that he is eventually going to get there (his orgasms are very important to me, and I love it when he is able to have them -- it is difficult for him, just as it is for me, so I understand how special it is -- we both require a LOT of stimulation and have felt inadequate in the past for being unable to come easily.)
If he's going to come in my mouth, no warning is needed -- I always swallow his semen.
Do you tell your partner you're cumming?
Yes. Actually, due to the type of relationship I'm in (my husband is a Dominant, I'm a submissive), we have established some rules, and one of them is that I have to ask and be granted permission before I come. He almost never, ever says "no," just because it's so mean! But when he does, all stimulation has to stop. If the stimulation kept going I would come anyway -- I wouldn't be able to help it. I just don't have that much control in holding off an orgasm once I reach the brink.
Do you feel compelled to do so, or is it simply part of talking dirty?
Hmm. Thinking of my past (non BDSM) relationships, I almost never announced it. A partner who is familiar with me (and I've never climaxed with an unfamiliar partner) will know the unmistakable breathing pattern, facial expressions, and body tightening that happens to me just before I come. It's pretty obvious, so no, I never felt compelled to announce it.
Does he/she tell you? Do you dig it, or do you find it off-putting?
My husband sometimes tells me, and sometimes doesn't. He's like me in that when he's approaching orgasm, the signs are pretty unmistakable. Sometimes he announces it if we've been fucking for a long time, I think just to let me know that he is eventually going to get there (his orgasms are very important to me, and I love it when he is able to have them -- it is difficult for him, just as it is for me, so I understand how special it is -- we both require a LOT of stimulation and have felt inadequate in the past for being unable to come easily.)
If he's going to come in my mouth, no warning is needed -- I always swallow his semen.
At.your.cervix
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I always feel a little let down if I don't hear a little bit of this: http://www.ladyofthecake.com/mel/frank/sounds/mistery.wav
AlteredEgo
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I know when men are about to come, usually. I don't need to be told, but it is still sexy to hear. Men don't know when women like me are about to come, not in my experience. I'm very vocal. Too many dudes are used to women whose moans signal imminent or present orgasm. My moaning just means I like what's happening. Too many dudes are used to women who gush a lot during orgasm. Well, I gush right before, so those men who tend to stop just when the flood comes, usually have just killed my orgasm. So I announce. I don't want to; it feels I organic. But I announce.
Ditto.
I've found that guys will take notice of the gush and then think that I am done, sometimes going so far as to withdraw their penis from me entirely or by ceasing all motions. Such actions absolutely murder my orgasm and make it unlikely for me to be able to string together a quick series of follow-up O's. Because of that, I try and coax them into continuing whatever it is that they're doing right, being explicit about the input that I need. Consequently, once a partner becomes familiar with my body, there is no need for me to announce my orgasms because they will already know what to do.
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AlteredEgo
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Yeah, paige, I'm with you. I can't talk much by then, but I can manage to grunt out "Don't stop! Don't stop!" My favorite back in Miami never quite got the hang of my orgasms. He was the best (maybe ever) at bringing them about, but he couldn't tell the difference between about to come and came and went. He used to think I was just fucking with his head telling him I hadn't come. I told him he was fucking with my head not letting me. We came to an understanding.
It's a terrible saying for any number of reasons, but "when in doubt, don't pull out" works for me as far as orgasms are concerned. I would rather have to stop a guy because I am too sensitive than deal with the alternative of being taken near to climax and then left there in frustration. (unless the game of choice is orgasm denial)
AlteredEgo
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I don't know if i'd use the word "announce." When I'm at that point I'm just in the moment and enjoying it. There are times I want the guy to know though, so he can take that into account in what he's doing. So I will sometimes say something.
DownandDirty
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Normally, I'd say that I don't announce things... But you can definitely tell...
The only time that I announce things is if it's one of those "experimenting" or "you're talking too much" nights.... Sometimes the bf gets vocal and wants to dirty talk and for some reason I start thinking about what he says rather than what's happening... so I have to announce that I'm close because if not, it kills my mood quickfast.
He'll say that he's cumming so we can either match up or so I know in case I think there's a chance that I can still get there. It's not often that I get off from just sex though but he's good at letting me know.
I think we both would rather know though before it happens so we're on the same page
The only time that I announce things is if it's one of those "experimenting" or "you're talking too much" nights.... Sometimes the bf gets vocal and wants to dirty talk and for some reason I start thinking about what he says rather than what's happening... so I have to announce that I'm close because if not, it kills my mood quickfast.
He'll say that he's cumming so we can either match up or so I know in case I think there's a chance that I can still get there. It's not often that I get off from just sex though but he's good at letting me know.
I think we both would rather know though before it happens so we're on the same page
JohnnyRoulette
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Attention everyone,... I'm having an orgasm.
That is all.
That is all.
RideRocket
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Truth be told, most guys are 'goal oriented' and it's nice to know when your female partner is having an orgasm. And yes, most guys are slow to take the hint, so vocal cues ranging from "uh uh uh" to "Don't stop! Don't stop!" to "Aaaarrrrggghhhh..." to "JESUS I'M COMING! RIGHT NOW! THIS INSTANT!" are well appreciated.
As far as me, I think body language plays a large factor. Most partners I've had can tell I'm about to cum because my 'head' swells right before. Plus my pace tends to quicken and I get a more vocal. But a well placed, "Ohhh I'm cumming!" always does the trick.
As far as me, I think body language plays a large factor. Most partners I've had can tell I'm about to cum because my 'head' swells right before. Plus my pace tends to quicken and I get a more vocal. But a well placed, "Ohhh I'm cumming!" always does the trick.
I remember when I was 20 and in college I was recounting a hook up I had which was particularly good though just a handjob. One of my buddies was ribbing me for not getting any further than that, and said, "Jesus, did you even nut?" I had never heard this term in reference to ejaculating, but I instantly knew I;d be using it the next time I was lucky enough to be hooking up and in a position to "nut."
That time came probably two weeks later. The next woman I was with was a sophomore named Sara. We were 69-ing and with her pussy and asshole gaping upside down over my head she bobbed down on my dick two sumptuous times in just the right way and I past the point of no return. I abated my clit-flicking just long enough to utter, "Ohhhhh Sara, I'm gonna nut."
Well, Sara either was very familiar with the expression or could infer the context quickly because she took my cock out of her mouth, laughed at the use of the slang, and stroked me off as I explosively nutted all over the place.
That time came probably two weeks later. The next woman I was with was a sophomore named Sara. We were 69-ing and with her pussy and asshole gaping upside down over my head she bobbed down on my dick two sumptuous times in just the right way and I past the point of no return. I abated my clit-flicking just long enough to utter, "Ohhhhh Sara, I'm gonna nut."
Well, Sara either was very familiar with the expression or could infer the context quickly because she took my cock out of her mouth, laughed at the use of the slang, and stroked me off as I explosively nutted all over the place.
AlteredEgo
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I missed it. Too late for a raincheck? Can I speak to someone in management?
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I occasionally let my husband know when I'm on the edge of orgasm by saying something like "baby I'm so close" or "don't stop". Most of the time I use nonverbal cues, some which are involuntary like shallow, rapid breathing and my legs twitching.
It depends on what we're doing too whether I signal or not. For example, when giving head I'll stop actively sucking his cock, but still keep him in my mouth and I'll start moaning, with those rapid shallow breaths, and he knows to just slowly move his cock in and out until I come.
If we're masturbating together and I don't want him to stop what he's doing (talking dirty, licking my nipples, etc.), I will announce it otherwise he may stop just as I near the final turn and then I can't help but release a heavy sigh and he knows I missed my shot.
It depends on what we're doing too whether I signal or not. For example, when giving head I'll stop actively sucking his cock, but still keep him in my mouth and I'll start moaning, with those rapid shallow breaths, and he knows to just slowly move his cock in and out until I come.
If we're masturbating together and I don't want him to stop what he's doing (talking dirty, licking my nipples, etc.), I will announce it otherwise he may stop just as I near the final turn and then I can't help but release a heavy sigh and he knows I missed my shot.
Yes, I announce it because that's his cue not to do anything different in that moment to break my concentration.
That moment would NOT be the time to change position, tempo or crack a joke.
That moment would NOT be the time to change position, tempo or crack a joke.
Sometimes my man likes to pick on me after sex by imitating my announcements. He's such a fucker.
Sometimes when I do announce it, he'll try to tease me by stopping his motions and holding me down. That's when I dominate the situation from underneath him and just hump the cum out of him while I get myself off. I've been known to fuck up some furniture.
Sometimes when I do announce it, he'll try to tease me by stopping his motions and holding me down. That's when I dominate the situation from underneath him and just hump the cum out of him while I get myself off. I've been known to fuck up some furniture.
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