Becoming more selective....

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This is something I really understand. After my first partner died I had no interest for such a long time (nearly 20 years) in pursuing any form of another committed relationship. We had such a wonderful life together that I could not imagine settling for anything but the best life had to offer. I had so many people question the fact that I was single and I always said... "I'm just picky and not willing to settle for second best."

This is also something that is a factor in the choices I make for my home, what I eat and what I wear and who my friends are. There is nothing worse than coming home to a place that you hate but you settled for. You should always eat and drink the best that you can afford and the same goes for what you wear because it is how the world perceives us. Fake friends are like fake relationships... you should never settle for less than your hearts desire because you are afraid of being alone. There is true courage in making this decision and I applaud you.

So be selective and picky because if you hold out for the best you will wind up like I did. Living and loving someone who was worth waiting for.
 
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NotSoDumb_Blonde said:
I dunno have a list!!! (that's in my Scot accent) lol. Seriously, I do not have a list.

I mean, okay, no awful smells.....but I like what's inside a person more than the icing on the cake if you know what I mean? Looks are great, but not if that's it. Intelligence is hot, but if that leads to hurtful sarcasm....see what I mean? Nothing serious. I think I simply don't look. Maybe I should open my eyes more when I'm out.
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Great Scottish accent there. I was looking around in my head for references & all I could come up with was Mel Gibson in Braveheart, or Professor McGonagall from Harry Potter (who's real, but sometimes goes by the Muggle name 'Maggie Smith'). Did you already have a phrase book for your trip to the UK? :biggrin1:
 
i agree with dolfette, there's nothing wrong with having high standards, it's actually hot when you come across a girl who actually has standards instead of letting just about anyone get in bed with em

just live life happy and someone will come across your life that is worthy of having you, it usually happens when you least expect it :smile:
 
Zyz said:
Great Scottish accent there. I was looking around in my head for references & all I could come up with was Mel Gibson in Braveheart, or Professor McGonagall from Harry Potter (who's real, but sometimes goes by the Muggle name 'Maggie Smith'). Did you already have a phrase book for your trip to the UK? :biggrin1:
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oh no, I need a phrase book for my trip???? :eek:
 
nudeyorker said:
This is something I really understand. After my first partner died I had no interest for such a long time (nearly 20 years) in pursuing any form of another committed relationship. We had such a wonderful life together that I could not imagine settling for anything but the best life had to offer. I had so many people question the fact that I was single and I always said... "I'm just picky and not willing to settle for second best."

This is also something that is a factor in the choices I make for my home, what I eat and what I wear and who my friends are. There is nothing worse than coming home to a place that you hate but you settled for. You should always eat and drink the best that you can afford and the same goes for what you wear because it is how the world perceives us. Fake friends are like fake relationships... you should never settle for less than your hearts desire because you are afraid of being alone. There is true courage in making this decision and I applaud you.

So be selective and picky because if you hold out for the best you will wind up like I did. Living and loving someone who was worth waiting for.
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Hugs, nudeyorker. Great advice. Listening to my heart.
 
nudeyorker said:
This is something I really understand. After my first partner died I had no interest for such a long time (nearly 20 years) in pursuing any form of another committed relationship. We had such a wonderful life together that I could not imagine settling for anything but the best life had to offer. I had so many people question the fact that I was single and I always said... "I'm just picky and not willing to settle for second best."

This is also something that is a factor in the choices I make for my home, what I eat and what I wear and who my friends are. There is nothing worse than coming home to a place that you hate but you settled for. You should always eat and drink the best that you can afford and the same goes for what you wear because it is how the world perceives us. Fake friends are like fake relationships... you should never settle for less than your hearts desire because you are afraid of being alone. There is true courage in making this decision and I applaud you.

So be selective and picky because if you hold out for the best you will wind up like I did. Living and loving someone who was worth waiting for.
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You, sir, just earned a top spot in my siggy. :You_Rock_Emoticon:
 
There is probably a man with this exact same problem looking for you. It's easy to say "stop looking" but it's much more difficult to do. Instead, open yourself to the possibilities and let yourself be surprised by someone you might not expect, in a situation you might not recognize.

Put out to the universe what you want, and then let it go and allow yourself to let the magic happen.
 
My main worry is that I'm entirely too selective about in when I'm physically attracted to a woman - I know there's a certain 'type' in my head, perhaps unrealistic - but the real kicker is when I actually meet women like this I'm suddenly sapped of all confidence and can never quite work up the nerve to actually talk to them. Probably why my dating life has been fucking awful lately...
 
I've always felt this way about guys in my mind. I never seem to find any guys that totally suit me. I used to worry about it for a long time, until I met the guy I'm with now. I guess the saying once you stop looking for something you'll find it, is very true.
 
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Giggles89 said:
You, sir, just earned a top spot in my siggy. :You_Rock_Emoticon:
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Thank you right back. I don't think I've been in a signature before... It feels nice. I was thinking about what I said after I posted it and it was too late to edit it because I got quoted very quickly but I guess all I really wanted to add was that by being selective and willing to wait that in the end it is the difference between really living or merely surviving.
 
nudeyorker said:
Thank you right back. I don't think I've been in a signature before... It feels nice.
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:eek:

I'm surprised by that. You give wonderful advice! :yup:

That was wonderful, what you shared. I'm sorry about your first partner. I just cannot imagine the heartbreak... and so happy for you that you found someone who makes you so happy now.

I'm a romantic through and through, so I love a great love story. :smile:
 
rtg said:
I have the opposite problem...there's too much candy in the store for me.... but not much opportunity to have any said candy cos they are either attached to another female, i'm too shy, i'm already taken, etc...
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if you want to bang other guys, i don't think you should be in a relationship
 
Perhaps it's that broad scottish accent. No-one can understand what your sayin? :)

p.s. And don't stress about it.
 
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