best ways to introduce myself to woman?

[lets dance]

i have a question for mostly the women here but guys should chime in too.

whats the best way to approach a woman if you want to talk to her at a bar or in public? im a bit shy at frist and i know who is within my league but once you get past the awkward beginning of the meeting someone im fine in that area. i usually date people that are friends of friends so its easier to get to know them but my situation in life has changed and i know almost all of my friends friends so im looking outside of that now. i just dont want to feel sleazy or have cheesy lines to get to meet a girl. so whats a good way to introduce yourself with out being too cocky or coming accross as a douche bag?

here is the usual situation for me. i'll go out with friends or by myself and sit and have a drink. i'll see a girl whom i think is attractive. i'll try to make eye contact but not too much. depending on the night if she looks back at me i'll linger for a second or i'll look down like i wasnt trying to look at them... i have always been embarassed about letting someone know im into them. i need to get over that. but after that im kinda stuck, im never sure what my next move should be. should i go up and just say "hi, im mark" and make talk about something going on at that point? i know that not everyone is the same but a little advice would be appreciated.

 

[confusedman]

ok.i am specialist on this subject.first.sit down and enjoy your drink
2)look around to find a girl that you like.
3)stare at her until she stares at you and try not to take your eyes of her first.this is very important.she has to see you that you are looking at her and she has to take her eyes first.that should take you 2-3 second and if she is not shy at all about 5-7 sec but eventually she will take her eyes of you and you are the winner.she knows that you have confidence and i bet that she is going to look at you again.try to look around and while she is looking at you,stare at her again and do the same and before she take her eyes off you,smile at her(in this way he will not consider you "dangerous").afteer a couple of minutes stand up ,take your drink and move forward to meet her.
and say something like:i know that i am too handsome but that doesn't explain why you keep looking at me!
or..
i love bothering beautifull girls that stare at me!
or

i don't know.think something cocky and funny.it works.
although women won't agree with me but i bet otherwise as i do this all my life naturally and it has 60%+ to get laid.

 

[confusedman]

if you are't as handsome as i am then you have 30% success.but think again.this is a great chance and after all if you sit down and don't do something the chances are 0% and you are an idiot young man that doesn't do anything to enjoy his life and what he wants!
good chance.

 

[SpoiledPrincess]

Any guy who stares runs the risk of being considered a possible stalker

Just go up to the girl who catches your eye and simply ask her if she wants a drink - it gives us the chance to say yes if we think we're interested and you can stay and chat while we drink the drink and see if we'd like you to stick around, if we don't fancy the look of you it gives us the chance to say a polite no thanks instead of the put down that something cocky gets.

 

[B_cigarbabe]

Exactly S.P.! Staring at a girl will give her the creeps!
She'll be thinking what the hell is wrong with this idiot? Judging my his name only, I would'nt take "confusedman's" advice! haha! If a woman is attractive to you just go up and say "Hi,my name is Mark and I'd like to buy you a drink or would you like to dance", something earnest and honest
will always come across as such. She is more likely to want you around if your not arrogant or cocky, it's a turn off to nice women,and always was to me! Spoiled Princess advice is on the money,just be yourself,I find shy is very attractive! Also try a church group or some place other than a bar.
Good Luck on your forays!
cigarbabe:saevilw:

 

[chicagosam]

Cigarbabe, I am staring intently at your innate beauty. Would you go out with me?:smile:

 

[Long&Thick]

I have my pen and paper beside my computer. So far I have:
1. Staring = Bad
2. Be Honest

These will come in handy in the future when I ask out some college beauty.

 

[WildHoney]

I like a calm direct approach.

Most of the time when women are out they are either out with girls, just having fun , or out with boyfriends or husbands etc and not looking to be picked up, I dont rate bars as good pick up places usually.

I like a guy to just smile, come over and ask if I'd like a chat or a drink


...I dont like staring or drunken leering and I also HATE being called over to a group of guys.

Chatting at the bar is good, and also just asking, can I get that for you ( as in buy me a drink) is great.

x

Honey

 

[anon265]

Staring at a woman is a very bad idea. It will likely creep her out. The only thing I would recommend as a "plan" is not to approach her while she is working or with a group.

First off, forget about "techniques", and "lines", and "what to say", and all of the bullshit you read in books, and online. There are no "techniques"... women are every bit as unique and diverse as men are. There is almost nothing to learn that will "work" with "most women". I will say one thing that applies to most women, and that is that they tend to be incredibly intuitive. They know when they are being "worked", and have an almost magical ability to know when thery are being lied to. You walk up and start trying to pull some smarmy technique you learned in a book, and she'll know it ... instantly.

How about this. Alter your GOALS. Don't make it a goal to get laid. In fact ... forget about getting laid. Hell ... forget about women. Make it your mission in life to improve yourself as much as possible, simply for the sake of improving yourself. If you need to ... get in shape. Get your teeth fixed. Get out of debt. Find challenging and exciting hobbies and activities. Cycling. Climbing. Writing. Go back to school. Whatever. Live with absolute integrity. Make good and lasting friends. Make yourself as absolutely honest and happy and content as possible. Arrange your life as much as possible to where you don't NEED women. Or need anything, except yourself. Find who you are and what you plan to do with the tiny sliver of time you have in this world. This takes years to do, and it isn't easy.

Now you're ready to find a companion.

Now you'll see someone walking down the street. And you'll simply walk up and say something honest, like, "Hi. I noticed you a moment ago, and I thought you were attractive. If it's okay with you I'd like to introduce myself. My name is _______ "

Or, alternatively, if all you want is sex ... just go find a hooker. Simpler and cheaper.

 

[3664shaken]

I agree don't stare,

What works with me is to say hello, corny lines SUCK. Don't come on to strong, I know I'm hot, got a nice body, voluptuous lips, etc. Stupid corny lines.

Just say:

"Hi my name is (your real name) (do not say 'hot stud', orgasm giver' 'john holmes jr.' etc. and yes I've been given all of those lines)

So back again to what you should say

"Hi my name is (name) and what is your name?"

If you are somewhat cute and not arrogant, pretentious, have been staring, drooling, slurring your words, smell like BO or vomit I will probably converse with you. Then we will see what happens.

This is no guarantee if there is no chemistry in 5 minutes your done. But to be honest I can't help you on that part.

Just be yourself, there are lots of women who will like you for that.

 

[Kassokilleri2ff]

Im going to a club 2moro, i might try the stare method that confused dude said, then i might try the "hi my name is The Almighty Lord Luciferion satanica of the underworld" and see how that plays out. I dont think ill be getting laid ahaha, but if i do, it would probably be 2moro, why you ask? Because ive been jerkin off soooo much my dick is all fucked up, and it would be my luck that she would be all over me ready to fuck and id be like "shit uhhhhh, i cant......" lolz

 

[EagleCowboy]

I've always been terrible at the approach, yet still manage it somehow. My thing is if I can get them talking, I try to make them laugh and keep them laughing whle trying to be charming. This usually works pretty well for me. At the very least, if it doesn't work out, they always wind up being good friends for many years to come.

I have tried this method on a few dares just to see if it would actually work. And believe it or not, I've never been slapped or even gotten a bad reaction from this.
I'd walk up to them and smile a shit-eating grin, stand there until they look at me, when they do, I'd say "HI!!" (big smile going here) Glance down and point at her shoes, then say "Nice shoes!! Wanna fuck?" (continue smiling big here)

They always seem to crack up as they admitted later that they were caught completely off guard. Their usual response while laughing was "No, but you can buy me a drink." :biggrin1:

 

[monstro]

Unless you want to date a mind reader and have an astral relationship, I wouldn't recommend the sitting and staring method for picking up women. He who hesitates waits forever.

Instead you should walk over to her. You smile warmly and make eye contact. You hold out your hand, say "Hi, my name is..."

If you have good hygiene, clean clothes, and act confident you'll do alright. People make judgements on other people within the first 30 seconds of meeting them, with the first 4 seconds being the most important. So smile. And for god's sake:

Act! Do Something! Take a risk!

 

[Chest Rockwell]

staring is only creepy when it goes on for too long without an introduction, or if the gal doesn't think the guy is cute.

usually though, it makes a gal blush if they find him interesting.

and the cocky-funny bit only works to a point. you can come across as a game-player if taken too far.