Breaking-Up

YEs Jay,

You have hit the crux of the matter .The head heals a lot faster than the heart.But they can be opportunities for self improvement or attitude readjustment. Or sometimes realizing that though it hurts it really is not a personal thing.

naughty
 
naughty..

Like many males, I have been dumped so many times that the ego or libido has developed calluses.

Now I hold back or am always a little suspicious of how a relationship is going. I have had a relationship or two that went sour overnight just because she met another person. Today, I doubt if there is such a thing as a static relationship. I know my needs and expectations change as I grow older or come in contact with other ideas and people.

jay
 
Zorrus, I am much better off than I was before. However, as Txquis put it... it still hurt and sometimes does still. I invested 9 years with this man..... that is a lot to contend with, especially considering we were never married. I loved him and will always have feelings for him.

Regrets, yes, we should have ended it earlier, particularly because of his behavior and his temper. Nonetheless, he taught me a lot for which I am grateful.

Bblumbee,

I'm sorry I missed this reply. I did not mean to sound callous. That was not my intention at all. I thought yours was a moving story: but I did think that over all you were better off without him.

Yes, we learn lessons. Would'nt it be nice in a way if we did not have to,

All the best from,

zzorus
 
I have to be one of the worst offenders under this heading.

I had the experience (terrible at the time) of breaking off an engagement. The breakup to end all breakups, or so it seemed at the time.

Of course the pain caused to her was appalling, and I know I didn't deal with it well; I still think about the wrenching feeling and the guilt from time to time, even though it is 30 years ago. But it was one of the best things I ever did, for her as well as for me, so no way do I regret it. Once you know the relationship is not going to work, you have to end it; and rarely is there an easy way. It can't be done without a great deal of messy pain, but better that than a break up years later with children and half a lifetime involved.
 
Originally posted by Max@Feb 22 2005, 03:08 PM
I have to be one of the worst offenders under this heading.

I had the experience (terrible at the time) of breaking off an engagement. The breakup to end all breakups, or so it seemed at the time.

Of course the pain caused to her was appalling, and I know I didn't deal with it well; I still think about the wrenching feeling and the guilt from time to time, even though it is 30 years ago. But it was one of the best things I ever did, for her as well as for me, so no way do I regret it. Once you know the relationship is not going to work, you have to end it; and rarely is there an easy way. It can't be done without a great deal of messy pain, but better that than a break up years later with children and half a lifetime involved.
[post=285458]Quoted post[/post]​

I've broken off an engagement, too... you're not the only one...