I thought of this thread yesterday when I was leaving the gym. On Saturdays, I frequently play basketball with some neighbors and friends at the gym. I am the only gay guy that plays, but everyone wants me on their team since I had played point guard for my university and we won a regional championship my senior year. At one point in the game, a pretty casual friend teammate came up to me and kind of tugged on me after planning a strategy against the key scorer on the other team. This casual friend was the least likely guy in the gym to do this, especially to me. When he moved in the neighborhood last year, he and his wife were somewhat taken aback that I and my partner, a prominent physician/ surgeon, were a gay couple.While they have always been friendly, a lot of times I thought it was somewhat forced and perhaps a result of religious beliefs. That never really bothered me; to each their own, but you could have knocked me over with a feather when he tugged on me as form of agreeing on a strategy in a basketball game! Even one of my close friends asked me on the way home what “that” was all about. I responded that perhaps he was checking to see if what he saw bouncing was real.
I've never seen nor heard of anything like this happening in ireland. I'm in the gym every evening. Loads of guys in the locker room. Even been in there with only one or two guys in there. Most are openly changing, some keep fairly well covered.
If you bump or brush off someone, it's just perceived as an accident, you apologise and move along. No one takes much notice.
But grabbing someones dick publicly would be a no no here. If someone's interested, I'm sure there's plenty of other ways of letting people know.
I'm openly gay. I'm on grindr, tinder and a few other dating apps. If someone was nearby while I'm working out or changing, they can contact me that way or give some sort of signal. I'm a private person by nature (bar nudity in the changing room), so I'd consider spontaneous touching as a violation of privacy. It's not difficult to drop hints if you really want to.
If you bump or brush off someone, it's just perceived as an accident, you apologise and move along. No one takes much notice.
But grabbing someones dick publicly would be a no no here. If someone's interested, I'm sure there's plenty of other ways of letting people know.
I'm openly gay. I'm on grindr, tinder and a few other dating apps. If someone was nearby while I'm working out or changing, they can contact me that way or give some sort of signal. I'm a private person by nature (bar nudity in the changing room), so I'd consider spontaneous touching as a violation of privacy. It's not difficult to drop hints if you really want to.
spaj8987
Legendary Member
Don't want to sound grim here but i'm thinking a whole mess of issues would come from this if it were considered normal.
I’ve had a few of my really close friends so this to me and I didn’t think anything of it. They were straight with wife’s or gf. It was always accompanied with a smart ass comment or complement. First time it happened was with a roommate and we were on guys trip to the beach. I was taking my time showering and getting ready and he was in a rush to get dinner. He came in to piss while I was drying off and he was chatting about the plans for the night and how hungry he was then he just tugged my dick and said put it away so we can eat. I didn’t think anything of it.
the last time it happened I was on a business trip with this guy I’ve worked with for several years. After our presentation we went back to my room to have a beer before going out to celebrate. I was in the middle of changing and in my boxers and he handed me a beer then tugged my junk and said I killed it today.
the last time it happened I was on a business trip with this guy I’ve worked with for several years. After our presentation we went back to my room to have a beer before going out to celebrate. I was in the middle of changing and in my boxers and he handed me a beer then tugged my junk and said I killed it today.
The more I look, the more I find tugging to be part of male group behavior where members are "tight" with each other, both gay and straight (and possibly more common to straight).
![xx got you.jpg]( "xx got you.jpg")
![xx bro9.jpg]( "xx bro9.jpg")
I am reminded of something. My adult softball team (we were in our 30,'s), used to "knock knock" on each others hard surfaced athletic cups on the field & dugout. It was a form of acknowledgement, hello, good job, nice hit At first, I was huh? - but it quickly became normalized. i think I am in the ball park (pun intended) of what the original thread poster had in mind.
Yes, normalize is the big idea. However, behind that idea is the creation of an activity that would be special to only a group or select few.
For example, I have seen a number of military buddies demonstrate their open connection with each other by doing some form of cuddling (like guys are doing in pic below). When in the military I experienced it first hand. (No pun intended
). They usually have uniforms on.
The two guys at the urinal may just be good friends who find humor in stressing out each other with unexpected behaviors. Once a behavior is repeated, it becomes normalized and lives on as a special activity shared by the two.
Another example: The three guys pictured below may have no sexual interest in the guy at the central urinal. But all three share a special history that allows them to: 1) pee together, 2) be nude together, 3) check out the guy in the middle, 4) make some comment about something personal to the center without being uncomfortable and discuss it.
I think this is a kind of relationship many gay guys would like to have with others but are less likely to develop than do straight
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LMAO!!!*tugs @Countryguy63 's pool noodle* err pool bat.
Just saw this for the first time! @Countryguy63Indy
Tony56
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Yes, normalize is the big idea. However, behind that idea is the creation of an activity that would be special to only a group or select few.
For example, I have seen a number of military buddies demonstrate their open connection with each other by doing some form of cuddling (like guys are doing in pic below). When in the military I experienced it first hand. (No pun intended
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Interesting you should mention that. A young man that I knew went off to the Air Force Academy and he posted on Facebook a picture of him and another cadet taking a nap together in a spooning position. They were fully clothed and it was at one or the other's home but I was really surprised to see something so homo-erotic coming from him.
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