Geist

[geist]

Originally posted by Pecker@May 27 2005, 10:49 PM
I was at Wal-Mart very early this morning. There were at most 10 customers in the place. Guess who had to sit and wait for a dazed and confused old lady to move her shopping cart so I could maneuver my electric scooter past her.

I usually wait patiently for these airheads to come back to Earth and see me waiting so they can say, "Oh, am I in your way?"

But this time I waited only a few seconds before I looked strongly at her and said,

"NI!!

She jumped about two feet and grabbed her cart, shoving it past me with a look on her face that said, "I thought retarded people had to be accompanied by a nurse!"

Ni works better than an aerosol boat horn.

[post=315176]Quoted post[/post]​

I should try it more offen

 

[B_DoubleMeatWhopper]

Originally posted by BuffMusicIdol@May 27 2005, 04:37 AM
Now, Double, see what you've started?

I didn't know that there were many Python fans on board other than Jonb and me. I need to be more careful next time.

 

[geist]

how can you not like python?

 

[13788]

TripodMillenium: Indeed.


I'm not sure I'd had many better laughs, EVER, than from MPatHG....

 

[B_DoubleMeatWhopper]

"How do you know that she's a witch?"

"She turned me into a newt!"

"A newt?!"

"I got better."

 

[Pecker]

Look, matey, I know a dead parrot when I see one, and I'm looking at one right now.

No no he's not dead, he's, he's restin'! Remarkable bird, the Norwegian Blue, idn'it, ay? Beautiful plumage!

The plumage don't enter into it. It's stone dead.

Nononono, no, no! 'E's resting!

 

[geist]

Originally posted by Pecker@May 28 2005, 08:54 PM
Look, matey, I know a dead parrot when I see one, and I'm looking at one right now.

No no he's not dead, he's, he's restin'! Remarkable bird, the Norwegian Blue, idn'it, ay? Beautiful plumage!

The plumage don't enter into it. It's stone dead.

Nononono, no, no! 'E's resting!

[post=315520]Quoted post[/post]​

what about "meaning of life?"

 

[B_DoubleMeatWhopper]

Originally posted by Pecker@May 28 2005, 10:54 AM
Look, matey, I know a dead parrot when I see one, and I'm looking at one right now.

No no he's not dead, he's, he's restin'! Remarkable bird, the Norwegian Blue, idn'it, ay? Beautiful plumage!

The plumage don't enter into it. It's stone dead.

Nononono, no, no! 'E's resting!

[post=315520]Quoted post[/post]​

"He's pining!"

 

[B_DoubleMeatWhopper]

Originally posted by geist@May 28 2005, 12:58 PM
what about "meaning of life?"

The Meaning of Life? Okay, how about:

"So, just listen. Now, did I or did I not do 'vaginal juices'?"

"Yes, sir. Yes, sir."

"Name two ways of getting them flowing, Watson."

"Rubbing the clitoris, sir?"

"What's wrong with a kiss, boy? Hmm? Why not start her off with a nice kiss? You don't have to go leaping straight for the clitoris like a bull at a gate. Give her a kiss, boy."


And, of course, there's always Every Sperm Is Sacred!

 

[geist]

Originally posted by DoubleMeatWhopper+May 29 2005, 08:19 AM--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(DoubleMeatWhopper &#064; May 29 2005, 08:19 AM)</div><div class='quotemain'><!--QuoteBegin-geist@May 28 2005, 12:58 PM
what about "meaning of life?"

The Meaning of Life? Okay, how about:

"So, just listen. Now, did I or did I not do &#39;vaginal juices&#39;?"

"Yes, sir. Yes, sir."

"Name two ways of getting them flowing, Watson."

"Rubbing the clitoris, sir?"

"What&#39;s wrong with a kiss, boy? Hmm? Why not start her off with a nice kiss? You don&#39;t have to go leaping straight for the clitoris like a bull at a gate. Give her a kiss, boy."


And, of course, there&#39;s always Every Sperm Is Sacred&#33;

[post=315733]Quoted post[/post]​

[/b][/quote]LIVE&#33; ORGAN&#33; TRANSPLANT&#33;

 

[ashlar]

RABBIT FISH&#33;

RAT TART&#33;

 

[headbang8]

I&#39;m a lumberjack, if you catch my drift.

 

[ashlar]

Originally posted by headbang8@May 29 2005, 10:58 AM
I&#39;m a lumberjack, if you catch my drift.

[post=315955]Quoted post[/post]​

HE&#39;S A LUMBERJACK AND HE&#39;S O.K.&#33;&#33;&#33;

 

[geist]

Originally posted by ashlar+May 30 2005, 05:08 AM--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(ashlar &#064; May 30 2005, 05:08 AM)</div><div class='quotemain'><!--QuoteBegin-headbang8@May 29 2005, 10:58 AM
I&#39;m a lumberjack, if you catch my drift.

[post=315955]Quoted post[/post]​

HE&#39;S A LUMBERJACK AND HE&#39;S O.K.&#33;&#33;&#33;

[post=315997]Quoted post[/post]​

[/b][/quote]
HE SLEEPS ALL NIGHT AND WORKS ALL DAY.

 

[B_DoubleMeatWhopper]

Originally posted by headbang8@May 29 2005, 03:58 PM
I&#39;m a lumberjack, if you catch my drift.

[post=315955]Quoted post[/post]​

You mean you wear suspenders and a bra? You want to be a girly, just like your dear Papa?

 

[jonb]

When Bush cut down a tree on Earth Day, all I could think of was the lumberjack song.

Actually, that&#39;s kinda strange, since most of my jokes about Bush&#39;s sexuality involve him simply being gay, not a transvestite.

 

[B_DoubleMeatWhopper]

Originally posted by jonb@May 29 2005, 07:51 PM
Actually, that&#39;s kinda strange, since most of my jokes about Bush&#39;s sexuality involve him simply being gay, not a transvestite.

I don&#39;t want him on my crew.

 

[geist]

so buttered scones with tea, is off then?

 

[headbang8]

Originally posted by geist@May 30 2005, 04:28 AM
HE SLEEPS ALL NIGHT AND WORKS ALL DAY.

Maybe I&#39;m not a lumberjack. I don&#39;t sleep ALL night.

Sorry...must go, there&#39;s a dead bishop on the landing.

hb8

 

[jonb]

Originally posted by DoubleMeatWhopper@May 29 2005, 12:07 PM
I don&#39;t want him on my crew.

[post=316018]Quoted post[/post]​

Don&#39;t worry. He&#39;s a flaming queen. As Chef said, "There&#39;s a huge difference between gay people and Mr. Garrison."