Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god ... I thought I posted in a thread such as this, but I was kinda high when I did, so I wasn't sure
Anyways, the following just happened on Saturday night:
I went 'bar hopping' with a few friends. Over time, a pretty big group of us (roughly 75 percent male I'd say) had come together, and I was having an alright time, but the place we were at was way too loud for my taste (am a quiet guy, I prefer quieter places). Eventually, we moved on to another, smaller, bar. Much more 'intimate', we could actually communicate with each other...
...Before I move on - you have to understand this: the two friends I was initially went out with, when it's just us get enough alcohol in them and they both complain about having a small penis (One more than the other, but once one starts the other joins in...). The weird thing is, once other people come around, they
completely change their tune. I find it all really annoying, but it's your standard macho, "don't ever let your guard down" mentallity I guess. Nonetheless, the situations I mentioned above, never involved these people. Other friends, yes - but these, no... until Saturday...
So we're at this bar, a couple tables pushed together, maybe two dozen of us total, at varying levels of intoxication. Both the friends I mentioned above are sitting to my left, this girl I never met before (another girl's sister... I think) on my right - and she was completely shitfaced. She's talking about her boyfriend, who was MIA. "I love him so much, but his cock is too small." She just blurted it right out, in front of everyone.
One of my friends jumped right in, I don't remember his exact wording... but the implication was that he didn't share said boyfriend's problem. I was perfectly content to just keep my mouth shut... but the other friend noticed my lack of participation, and says aloud, "What about you, [name witheld
]?"
"I'm keeping my mouth shut, that's what."
And my friend stuck out his pinky finger, right in front of everyone! Aaagh! Not cool! I had to say
something. So I just went with...
"All I know is, I don't have anything to worry about." A weak defense, I admit... but it was all I could come up with.
And this girl... in all her drunken glory, bumped her hand into my stomach, then my belt, before finally stopping her hand above my crotch. And then she grabbed it, right there under the table!
......
Guess who got her number? :tongue: