Infidelity

[maestro071]

Having sex with someone else I don't consider as cheating of my g.f. Just, I try to avoid emotianal attachment, and as far as I manage to do so, that is just an pleasurable activity of 2 adaults. So no need to report and justiffy. Life is short...

 

[D_Marazion Analdouche]

I agree. Bilateral prenuptual agreements could address a lot of problems. Maybe find out that you guys aren't compatible and/or compromising in the process. Marriage is a parnership. Marriage is a business.

Yeah but all the documents in the world go out the window if you have kids. You may be able to save your (_l_) regarding alimony but the support payments will still be very high.

 

[cufbi]

I've been cheated on myself and know the pain, so absolutely, no way would I cheat on a partner

 

[Bbucko]

I have not; I don't think I could.

Of course, if you ask 100 people, "what does 'cheating on your SO mean'?", you are likely to get 105 different answers. From my point of view, cheating or infidelity would include anything you feel you have to hide from your SO, anything you do that makes you feel guilty or that you lie about... not just "sex with another person."

Honesty and integrity have been very important to me, as far back as I can remember, so a big part of my life philosophy has always been, "if you have to lie about doing it, then don't do it." I have a very low tolerance for dishonesty in people who claim to care about me.

DC_DEEP wrote my response for me, though I'll add that I find strict sexual fidelity to be an unnatural state. I've never begun a LTR that started open, nor finished one that didn't end that way. In all the years and all the relationships I've had, only one broke up due to sexual infidelity, and that wasn't because he had sex with someone else, it was because he broke the most important rule governing how we'd do so, and that was over New Year's 1983-84.

After six or so months of silence, we picked up the friendship again and stayed best buds for years. No one knows you quite like an ex, and no one has greater motives to only tell the truth from his heart.

 

[schwulboy1989]

My boyfriend and I have a semi-fictitious "List" of guys we are allowed to partake in.

The part that is real are the celebrities on the list. We both have an understanding that if one of us is presented with an opportunity to fuck a celebrity, we should probably take it up. We also agreed, though, that we should do our best to include the other, or film it/take pictures (if possible). We also agreed that we should let the other know beforehand, just in case the other had an issue with it.

The part that is only sort of real are the guys that we will pass on the street, or friends of each others' that are really hot. In those instances, they must be 3-ways.

We both had a sort of cynical talk about how almost all relationships result in either infidelity or bringing a 3rd (or 4th :wink: ) person into the bed. We agreed that if we get to that point to include the other, rather than do it behind the back.

Although we also, upon later discussion, decided that neither of us were comfortable with the other doing anything with anyone else in any situation other than together (or with the celebrities).

But to answer the question from my standpoint, I will not do anything dishonest, and I will not do anything that will jeopardize my relationship with him. He's the best I could ever hope for, and keeping him in my life is more important than finding someone else to have sex with.