Judging a man's performance.

Discussion in 'Women's Issues' started by Drifterwood, Nov 25, 2009.

  1. Drifterwood

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    I keep seeing people use this expression, and I find it very insulting, revealing of sexual immaturity and frankly makes those who say it completely unattractive to me.

    Some of your attitudes about men stink. What on earth do you think we are? (OK I am looking forward to the answers on that.)

    And I can't help but notice that most of those who talk like this about men, are not voluntarily single. What a surprise.

    Thanks. :smile:
     
  2. whatireallywant

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    What if you give his performance a "9.8" (because we all know that you can't really give the "Perfect 10" anymore? :biggrin1:)
     
  3. cdarro

    cdarro New Member

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    Ahhh, he's got a point. What if we talked about a woman's peformance (Other than faking)? We'd be shot! ;)
     
  4. AlphaMale

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    I don't really disagree with what the OP is saying at all, but as a man one thing that I have always prided myself on is being very good at sex. I want to please my partner many times and long before I please myself.

    I'm not sure if that's really a good or bad thing, but I want to keep my self physically fit and keep my cock rock hard so am I my sexual partner's stud! Thinking of sex in that manner is the most exciting to me.

    I don't think it's wrong for women to demand good sex! In fact, most women should demand way better sex than they settle for nowadays! I wouldn't expect her to be turned on or into it if I wasn't making it easy for her. :smile:
     
    #4 AlphaMale, Nov 25, 2009
    Last edited: Nov 26, 2009
  5. D_Tintagel_Demondong

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    Men can't fake it; it's all out there. They have to get it up or it doesn't happen. His performance is crucial, so how can you criticize those who complain about a man's performance. If a woman has to use her vibrator to get off because he can't even get it up then I wouldn't blame her for being frustrated. I'm not defending women here: I think that many don't know how much pressure is on the male to perform well.

    As far as judging goes, if you hear an applause then you hit all the right spots.
     
  6. helgaleena

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    Drifter, you can resent being told that something as heartfelt and holy as sex is a 'performance'. It's not usually the stage or the movie set. In fact having someone watching what I am doing during sex who is not having it with me is my idea of purgatory.

    But as others posted, some people enjoy 'performance'. Sexual extroverts you could say. And what is a performance without reviewers?

    At our press we recently put out a voyeurism themed anthology. And in another of our titles a couple 'crashed' a private video session, both taking part and taking the pictures, to fulfill their own fantasies.

    Just because you and I do not want applause but rather cherishing acceptance, that does not mean that it is not a very popular way to think of sex.
     
  7. Gillette

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    H, I think the greater objection is to the judging of the performance as if we were in position to score our sexual partners.

    Performance in itself is a bit of a crass term to use as it implies that the other party must do all the work while we are observers there to cheer, applaud or heckle. The experience is meant to be shared. For myself I don't get bent over the word. Sex is, after all, frequently referred to as "the act". Also, men are constantly discussing their own performance and related issues so I don't see it as a term women use to denigrate men, we're just picking up on their usage of it.

    With regards to judging our partners, to an extent the belief that we can or even should has come from those very same partners. It's not uncommon to hear not merely, "Was it good for you?", but, "Was it the best you've ever had?". What the hell is that other than a request for evaluation and ranking?

    Personally I blame testosterone and it's apparent link to obsession with statistics.
     
    #7 Gillette, Nov 26, 2009
    Last edited: Nov 26, 2009
  8. Drifterwood

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    This has been shown to be only 64% valid.
     
  9. Guy-jin

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    Fortunately some of us don't have to ask because in the throes of ecstasy our woman shouts: "You are the best I've ever had!"

    :biggrin1:
     
  10. Guy-jin

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    But 79.2% of all statistics on the Internet are made up on the spot, so she may have a point.
     
  11. dolfette

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    pft! i happily admit to being shite in bed.
    i'm fully entitle to say when i think men are being shite too.
     
  12. Gillette

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    C'mon. It has to be at least as high as 64.9%. :tongue:

    But have you kept track of the percentage of times you've heard that? :cool:
     
  13. Guy-jin

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    Of the times I've heard it, I've heard it 100% of the time. I'm just. That. Good. :biggrin1:
     
  14. tasteslikejellyjam

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    I don't really talk about performance...
    that's kind of lame...
    most people just need to be taught about what you like...
    its a lack of communication on the women's part & maybe his for not asking...
    I always bring up skill...
    I only use it when someone is surprised that a normal size guy can really rock their socks...
    I call that skill...
    they have certain knowledge of how to work it...
    mainly an understanding of what they can do...
    & the basic anatomy of the female body helps...
    some men are also good at asking questions & wanting to learn...
    to me... performance = stamina and skill = knowledge
    so I'm not a huge fan of performance or caring about it...
    its all about the skill... ;-)
     
  15. Gillette

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    I don't doubt.
    Rawr!
     
  16. Drifterwood

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    Fixed that for ya.
     
  17. dolfette

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    for me it's more about attitude.
    i hate that need to pleasure me stuff.
    i hate orgasm hunters.
    i hate and sort of mamby pamby stuff.

    just fuck.
    fuck without restraint.
    ...and, preferably, with restraints.
     
  18. HazelGod

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    Now that's just a goddamned shame. :no:
     
  19. Drifterwood

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    I don't think so jellyjam. You can put a performance on that will rock someone's world, but it can leave the performer completely cold.
     
  20. Guy-jin

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    I'll give you an orgasm whether you like it or not!
     
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