'pulling'. All I have to say is that these men NEED to know that we are Trans when it comes down to it. Of course, use your best judgement. Let them know but not put them on the spot. Plus, let them know as soon as it is rightfully proper. Don't say it at a bar to them because they will just go tell their friends (I made that mistake - never again). Just DECLINE THEIR OFFER and them. Doesn't matter how hott he is because it's for YOUR safety. When they know, they then have the choice to pursue or to discontinue. At least this way, he is making an informed and conscious choice and therefore will not retaliate against you (as long as you were polite, respectful, kind and firm and DID NOT sexually advance upon him ir allow him to kiss, hold or touch you - keep him at a comfortable distance) All spoken from experience. But back to 'pulling'. It goes both ways. Doesn't matter who approaches who in starting the conversation. If you happen to get his number and were not sexually comming on to him, he needs to be told in that first call or within the first 10 min of texting back n forth of messages. Sure, let him know you a bit first then go ahead and let him know. In my experience with phone calls and text messages, they decline 2/3rds of the time after. They always thank me and let me know that I was beautiful and highly respectful of them regardless if they chose to continue with me or not. That's how it should be: respectful. Not sending nudes, asking for nudes or being sexual. Can't. Because he will most likely get upset. Gotta do all that AFTER he responds back with a YES.