Should I?

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by luvmycock, Mar 6, 2011.

  1. luvmycock

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    I have been teetering with this for a while and I have come to the realization that I think I am Bisexual. WOOHOO! for me. I mean I have been knowing this for a while but I'm not really one for labeling. I feel it creates this mindset that things have to be done a certain way and if not then it's wrong. Anyway so I'm thinking I need to come out with it so it won't be such a shock. The only thing is I don't know if I'm ready for all that. My parents will be totally cool with it, my brother is gay and it's no big deal. So I'm not worried about that, but I kinda wonder what my friends will think. It's so weird because I try to live my life not worrying about what others think about what I do but my friends and I all went to school together so I don't know how my guy friends will feel. My best female friend I think will be cool with it. It takes a lot of strength to show your true self and I try to but I don't know if I am ready for this step. I know if I do it will be a big weight lifted off my shoulders and I will be able to be more open about it.

    Any suggestions?
     
  2. Florida Boy

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    That sounds as heavy as announcing that you are gay or something.
     
  3. luvmycock

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    yeah, and idk maybe I'm thinking too much about it. Maybe I should just do it and let the cards fall where they may.
     
  4. luvmycock

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    any other thoughts?
     
  5. travisblue

    travisblue New Member

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    i never understood the whole 'proclamation' thing. fuck who you want. don't sneak around if you don't want to. others can figure it out on their own. life's more more interesting that way anyways - watching their reaction as it dawns on them. you playing it off like it matters about as much as what you had for breakfast last tuesday.

    I wonder if anyone ever came out but then changed their mind and..
    I just thought of a new post!!
     
  6. benoweed

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    That is something we can't decide for you. But we can share some experience. I came out quite late as I was, as you, scared of the reactions. I just waited until I found the right guy and then I had to tell everyone.

    For good friends it didn't change anything in our relationships, as they like me for who I am, not for who I fuck with. Some had a bad reaction, but if they can not cope with who I really am, than I don't think they are worthwhile to be considered as friends.

    Considering the reaction I had I regretted to not have done it earlier, it would hav been much easier to be able to be open about it...

    So if you feel ready for it, go for it, but don't push yourself. If you feel the timing is not right yet, leave it.
     
  7. nzsomebody

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    Personally, I'm of the opinion that unless I'm fucking them, why do I need to announce my sexual preferences? If it's relevant then I'll tell them :)

    I guess I'm a bit weird, but I'm not one to put a huge emphasis on my sexuality.
     
  8. Pierced1953

    Pierced1953 New Member

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    Dito!!!
     
  9. luvmycock

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    thanks for the good advice everyone.
     
  10. lvsxy808

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    This is my thought too. If you want to date a guy, date a guy. And in the midst of a conversation with your friends, just say "So I was out with this guy," like you would anything else. Don't make a deal of it, just act like it's a completely neutral fact... which it is.
     
  11. DV8

    DV8
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    Personally, I don't think that you necessarily have to make a huge deal about it, but I do feel that it's something that you should be able to discuss. If you were talking to some of your friends, and they were talking about girls they've screwed, and you decided to mention a guy you've screwed, then you'd probably get some stares and some questions.
    I'm not saying that you need to hold a press conference, but there's nothing wrong with giving people a heads up when they've always believed "A" about you, and the truth is it's really "B." It can actually help you and your friends and family avoid awkward situations, like your mom thinking that you're going to bring a girl to dinner, and it turns out to be gym buddy, Brian.
     
  12. WellHung83

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    I think its just that bisexuality for guys at least is still a big deal since its not at all big in mainstream media as much as female bisexuality is, or indeed accepted as well as female bisexuality. Its still a big deal for most guys these days to come to the realisation that they do indeed prefer both males and females in both a sexual and romantic nature and so its still gonna take a while for the male variant of bisexuality to become more relevent and more accepted in the mainstream media and society as a whole. Its still a very touchy and controversial subject.

    In any case, congrats man at coming to your realisation and wish you all the best :)
     
  13. D_Poppy_Cocque

    D_Poppy_Cocque New Member

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    Be who you are, and don't hide for anyone.... it only leads to more suffering on your part.
     
  14. luvmycock

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    I truly thank you all for the comments. I was kinda almost caught the other day. I was showing someone something on youtube and I accidentally went back too far and landed on the log out page. I was like OH NO I'm outed for sure now, lol. It was only for a min and Im sure no one saw anything but it felt like the longest min ever. Thank God the words above LPSG are small :)
     
  15. nzsomebody

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    Outed in what way? LPSG isn't a gay website...
     
  16. luvmycock

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    no it's not but none of my friends or family know I'm on the site.
     
  17. exwhyzee

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    Meh, I think its more fun to keep your sexual fantasies to yourself, but if you ever meet someone and introduce them to friends as a significant other, or if you are ever caught looking at porn...you can bring it up at that time. The shock value will be a lot more fun at that point. Until then, its all theoretical anyway...and your interests will evolve and change over time. Worry less, enjoy more.
     
  18. tiggerpoo

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    Ditto.
    But also, you don't need to announce anything to anybody.
     
  19. erratic

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    I understand all the people who are like "Why should you need to tell everybody" but let's be honest about this, dude. When you say "Oh I went out with this guy last night" your friends and family are going to think you're gay. Which is fine, but then when you say "Oh I went out with this chick last night" a month later they're going to be like "WTF I thought you were gay!?"

    The biggest reason people have to "proclaim" how out they are is that being non-heterosexual fucking confuses a lot of people. It's stupid and unfair, but it's the real world. Being bi is especially difficult to explain. I've had a lot of great bi men and women in my life, and they are constantly coming out as bi, even to people who already know they aren't straight. They're also constantly fighting the "oh, you're really gay but just don't want to admit it" bullshit.

    So dude, do what you want and do what you feel comfortable doing, but be ready for a lot of confusion if you aren't clear on how you identify. All the "labels are horrible and we should just be who we are" talk is great, but (and I say this with great sadness) that is not how the world actually works. And as for being unsure how your friends will react - if your friends don't like you after they find out you're bi then they're actually friends with their made-up idea of you, not the real you. That's drama you probably don't need.
     
  20. lvsxy808

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    Exactly the point. It's none of their business really, so if they're confused, let them work it out for themselves. It's not up to the OP to clarify himself for their benefit.
     
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