Something Unique

[Shelby]

I eviscerated myself running through a sliding glass door when I was seventeen. Apparently I survived.

 

[GoneA]

I eviscerated myself running through a sliding glass door when I was seventeen. Apparently I survived.

ME TOO!!! except i wasn't seventeen and altogether it wasn't that ............ severe


my grandparents had to but an big 'T' in front of the sliding door.

 

[Pecker]

I eviscerated myself running through a sliding glass door when I was seventeen. Apparently I survived.

No, Shelby, you didn't survive. This is the afterlife !! :scared2:

bwa ha ha !!

 

[rob_just_rob]

I feel like a cookie cutter person after reading this thread.

 

[EnglishGentleman]

I used to be an optician before I changed careers...

Shortly before I gave it up I dealt with a little girl called "Loreal"... When I asked the mum how she came up with the name she said:

"She was a very difficult labour... but she was worth it!":biggrin1:

• I always had some little amoeba looking things that floated on my eyeball. I never knew if it was just me and never asked. I found out in science class while looking in a microscope trying to find the organism in the slide and I asked my lab partner if she had found it and she said, "I can't tell. I don't know if this is it or if it's those little things on your eyeball, you know." That was a great relief to me and one of the greatest learning experiences ever.

• One of my eyelids will flitter for a few days every few years. This is annoying. Because it's uncontrollable and motherfuckers think you're crazy or shifty.

The "Amoebas" sound like "Asteroidal Hyelites" which would be inside your eyes floating in the viscous fluid (Vitreous Humour) which keeps your eyes in shape (Shakespeare's "Exquisite Jelly"). Sometimes called "floaters", most people have at least a couple, but alot of people never notice them. They never go away, but they can go out of your field of view. They are empty, broken capillary blood vessels from the interior of the sclera and the retina, caused by birth trauma, head injuries or illness. People who have them will usually see them in bright light conditions, when looking at the sky, or at a white surface.

The twitch is probably just an antsy nerve, usually brought on by stress or fatigue, again quite common and nothing to worry about.

 

[b.c.]

As a preschooler I was once chased by a mad rooster.

 

[rawbone8]

the sound of one hand clapping

literally a stupid human trick:

I can audibly clap with only one hand, by folding my fingers like a hinge,
rapidly slapping closed against my palm




my wife is Zen Buddhist and finds this hilarious and strange

 

[inkubus963]

And here I had nearly pissed my pants when I had told him what I did. Can you go to hell for stealing something that's free anyway?

Yes, because the sin is in your purpose, not in the end result. But, since you were sorry, you won't go to hell :smile:

As to the original subject: Every year, sometime between the week before and the week after my birthday, some random event happens that should result in my death. I've had my scalp sheared by a garage door falling on it, been dragged by a tornado, chased by a fireball, nearly run down by a late bus, it runs the gamut.

As far as someting dirty... I have a fur & frottage fetish.

 

[D_alex8]

My full name comes across as faintly implausible in English, and the last time I passed through Los Angeles International, those friendly Homeland Security guys made me provide additional documentation to prove that I wasn't attempting to travel under an assumed name or a stage name.

 

[tallguypns]

This one time when I was 33, I posted a unique statement to a forum to increase my post count.

 

[jeff black]

This one time when I was 33, I posted a unique statement to a forum to increase my post count.

Thats not unique tallguy. Why do you think I started this thread:biggrin1: :biggrin1:

 

[art]

When I was 4 and my brother 5, we were playing in the garage, and I bounced a pick axe off his head. Not that I intended to...but it was pretty cool the way all the blood came out, and they rushed him to the hospital. For some reason, I got no sympathy.

When I was in jr high, I made tv newsman David Brinkley a Scotch and quinine water instead of the Scotch & soda he asked for. He kept bringing it back for me to try again, until eventually he sighed and said, "Just make me a Scotch and WATER."

 

[Chuck64]

I took the ACT and SAT exams in junior high as part of a Duke University program for "gifted" kids. I did better on both exams in 7th grade than I did my Senior year of high school. I think I'm slowly getting more and more stupid as time goes on.

During a river tubing trip, because of a severe misjudgement of my athletic abilities, the height of a dam, and the strength of the undercurrent, I was nearly sucked in to a large drainage pipe where I would have certainly drowned. Thank God I was a fat kid.

 

[hotnmpls2000@yahoo.com]

Okay, don't hate me animal lovers...

I accidentally killed my neighbor’s cat. I'd mowed my lawn one afternoon, and put my lawn mower in my garage and closed the door. (It was August, and about 90 during the night all week.) Later I heard them calling for their cat. I was worried that maybe I'd locked the cat in the garage, even though I hadn't seen it, so I opened the door before I went to bed. In the morning before I left for work, I'd looked inside, didn't see it, and closed the door. I didn't mow my lawn again for about two weeks. When I walked in the garage, I noticed a little pile of white fluff on a chair that a friend was storing there. It was the cat.

I threw the chair in the trash with a newspaper over it and never confessed that I new why the cat didn't come back home. I really hadn't like them to begin with.

 

[Pecker]

I took the ACT and SAT exams in junior high as part of a Duke University program for "gifted" kids. I did better on both exams in 7th grade than I did my Senior year of high school. I think I'm slowly getting more and more stupid as time goes on.

May I offer my sincerest condolences on your loss of Algernon.

 

[tallguypns]

I think I'm slowly getting more and more stupid as time goes on.

I know precisely what you mean. My days of erudition are long past. In fact, me feel stupider by the minute. Me used two be real brain now me no nuthin.

 

[Onslow]

May I offer my sincerest condolences on your loss of Algernon.

You'll notice his name is Chuck which ain't that far from Charly--

 

[inkubus963]

May I offer my sincerest condolences on your loss of Algernon.

I loved that book!

 

[inkubus963]

I know precisely what you mean. My days of erudition are long past. In fact, me feel stupider by the minute. Me used two be real brain now me no nuthin.

Is your next line, by chance, "Hulk Smash!"???

 

[GoneA]

I know precisely what you mean. My days of erudition are long past. In fact, me feel stupider by the minute. Me used two be real brain now me no nuthin.

as i once said on an interview:

i be here for job, can you give me job