Why does average seem so small?

[D_22]

I can definitely understand the frustration with being in the "average" range and seeming small. While I haven't had much complaints when in action, it does feel like what's estimated as the "average size" actually isn't actually the average size when most of my friends who's dicks I've seen or dudes I've messed around with have all been bigger than me by a landslide compared to the very select tiny few who were smaller than me.

 

[Markus777]

I can definitely understand the frustration with being in the "average" range and seeming small. While I haven't had much complaints when in action, it does feel like what's estimated as the "average size" actually isn't actually the average size when most of my friends who's dicks I've seen or dudes I've messed around with have all been bigger than me by a landslide compared to the very select tiny few who were smaller than me.

How big are you?

 

[Trott.lint]

How big are you?

You just beat me to asking that question.

 

[Markus777]

You just beat me to asking that question.

It happens lol.

 

[D_22]

6.5-7 / 4.7 in girth

 

[Markus777]

6.5-7 / 4.7 in girth

That's above average, not average.

 

[Trott.lint]

6.5-7 / 4.7 in girth

I'd be very happy with that.

 

[Markus777]

I'd be very happy with that.

Maybe he expected to be longer/thicker since he's african american?

 

[Trott.lint]

Maybe he expected to be longer/thicker since he's african american?

Well, I can understand wanting to be thicker, but I'd certainly be happy with the length. True story coming up, though: I used a flexible jelly dildo as part of a strap-on, on my partner recently, to try to give her vaginal & cervical orgasms (she's had them in the past with VWE boyfriends, but has only had clitoral with me). She was very wet, but said she felt absolutely no difference - girth or length - between me & the dildo. Size difference: the dildo was 7.25x5.5. I find that quite incredible, but I have a feeling it was because she was so wet & does have a deep vagina.

As for race differentials in size: I believe in them personally, but I can see how they could be damaging. The only ones who stand to win from such 'stereotypes' are Asians, reputedly smaller on average. I can understand why African-Americans who are 'mainstream average' (whatever that is) may feel the pressure to be as big as they're 'supposed' to be.

But as I'm not A-A, or Asian, I can't talk with any credibility about their circumstances. It's all just conjecture.

 

[emptybottlesandcans]

Well, I can understand wanting to be thicker, but I'd certainly be happy with the length. True story coming up, though: I used a flexible jelly dildo as part of a strap-on, on my partner recently, to try to give her vaginal & cervical orgasms (she's had them in the past with VWE boyfriends, but has only had clitoral with me). She was very wet, but said she felt absolutely no difference - girth or length - between me & the dildo. Size difference: the dildo was 7.25x5.5. I find that quite incredible, but I have a feeling it was because she was so wet & does have a deep vagina.

As for race differentials in size: I believe in them personally, but I can see how they could be damaging. The only ones who stand to win from such 'stereotypes' are Asians, reputedly smaller on average. I can understand why African-Americans who are 'mainstream average' (whatever that is) may feel the pressure to be as big as they're 'supposed' to be.

But as I'm not A-A, or Asian, I can't talk with any credibility about their circumstances. It's all just conjecture.

Why would you believe in something in which the only "proof" that exists is a horridly racist map of "penis size by country". No real science supports any difference in size. Trust me, I've looked, you won't find it.

 

[Markus777]

Why would you believe in something in which the only "proof" that exists is a horridly racist map of "penis size by country". No real science supports any difference in size. Trust me, I've looked, you won't find it.

Yea but even though those stereotypes might not be entirely true, people will still expect those stereotypes to be true. And if those expectations are not met, it might lead to disappointment and insecurities.

 

[MarkLondon]

PS: And I do believe the estimations of my ex & my current girlfriend. My ex, particularly, was interested in dick size because she preferred larger. My current gf had no interest in lying to me about her previous experiences & she's not a SQ, so I believe her. They could still be anomalies in terms of size of guys they've slept with, but the body of evidence I've been exposed to in life suggests to me that they are not.

As a last point: I'd be the happiest guy on this forum if it's ever proved beyond douA true 6 or 7 can be exciting but a 4
bt that 5.16 (or even 5.5-6) really is stone cold average. I've got nothing to gain from suggesting that it isn't.

Believe me, with direct experience of other men's penises for over 40 years and not relying on girlfriend's reports, 5" (which we call 6") is the average. And it's perfectly adequate. In fact, just right.

 

[Trott.lint]

Believe me, with direct experience of other men's penises for over 40 years and not relying on girlfriend's reports, 5" (which we call 6") is the average. And it's perfectly adequate. In fact, just right.

Count me in as pleased to read that.

 

[emptybottlesandcans]

Yea but even though those stereotypes might not be entirely true, people will still expect those stereotypes to be true. And if those expectations are not met, it might lead to disappointment and insecurities.

Yup. Completely agree. But that's a social and psychological matter, not a biological one.

 

[sangheili90]

OP, I don't think being a regular visitor/poster on this particular site is going to help you overcome your self perceived lack of size.

As someone who has struggled with body image issues, I thank my emotionally abusive adolescent years for that, my advice would be to stop focusing on something you cant change and instead focus on your positive physical qualities and work on what can be improved.

 

[deleted716371]

I used to think I was about average. In my teens, my cock reference (erect) came from porn and I Thought they looked about the size of mine. Wasn't until years later I realized I'm actually on the big side. So, I guess the cultural preference for displaying big cocks really mess up what we consider average. And I guess all the small guys who (understandably) hide their cocks as well as the big cocks who show off, all contribute to the scewed size perception.

At last, I consider it a blessing to have a cock at all. Size is secondary - and I'm sure most women agree.

 

[injoyinit]

A big factor too is body fat. The people that we tend to see without clothes on and showing off their equipment are typically lean and in shape guys. The average however includes all men... those men that have lots of body fat along with the skinnier /in shape men most commonly seen. Those that have lots of body fat have part of their penis in layers of fat. (Think of a wooden post at the beach that is 6 foot tall. A storm blows a bunch of sand in, and now the post only appears to be 2 feet tall, but part of the post is below the sand)

 

[Trott.lint]

A big factor too is body fat. The people that we tend to see without clothes on and showing off their equipment are typically lean and in shape guys. The average however includes all men... those men that have lots of body fat along with the skinnier /in shape men most commonly seen. Those that have lots of body fat have part of their penis in layers of fat. (Think of a wooden post at the beach that is 6 foot tall. A storm blows a bunch of sand in, and now the post only appears to be 2 feet tall, but part of the post is below the sand)

I'm not sure this is a big factor - certainly not in my case. I used to weigh 132 pounds and I now weigh 176 pounds. My cock size was 5.1 before, and it's the same now. So in my case, that doesn't fly.

 

[sdp]

You're lucky, just a few pounds significantly affect my fat pad.

 

[Scott8361]

I'm 6.5" x 4.5 " and I always felt small. I think my slender girth contributed to that. I thought that my length might be considered average but my girth put it into small territory.

I haven't had many partners. Got married and that was it... one woman. Now I'm divorced 20 years later and have an awesome girlfriend. She's had a fair amount of experience and thinks my cock is big. That really surprised me. She calls it long and lean. She says it's the longest she has had and feels the fit is the best she's ever had.

I see newer evaluation of size studies puts my length in the 95% range. Hard to believe. ..so maybe she is right. Average is smaller than most think given the distortions of porn.