Well, I'm not big... especially when I was 17. But I made a girl cry too. And it didn't even involve my penis. It was the first time that I fingered a girl. I was very gentle and she was loving it. In fact, she had what I think was her first orgasm. When she was done, she freaked out on me and told me, Told me that I raped her, and how she was going tell everyone. So now we were both freaked out. I did what I could to calm her down, but I'll tell you this... that was the last time I ever went near a vagina for the rest of my life.
So my point is that sometimes it has nothing to do with pain or pleasure or anything of the sort... sometimes it's just a fun time gone horribly wrong.
To this day, even on a porn video, if a woman is cumming, I have to turn it off.
Freaked out for life in terms of women.
It's official - women can turn men gay!
I do think that you should get some aversion therapy for that. Stroke a kitten, eat a cheesecake, or whatever it takes to stop you having that response. It can't be good for you.
I've had a few dodgy situations like that - none of them were virgins though. An older woman flipped out on me when I was about 20, the first time we had sex, though she stopped the second she saw the blind panic in my eyes thinking that this beautiful woman was going to accuse me of rape.
I've had several women cry just BEFORE I had sex with them, & several stop me for no apparent reason (well one had had her first ejaculation & didn't know what the hell had happened was embarassed) during sex.
All of these women were really friendly with me afterwards, & whenever I saw them, so I guess I just might be unlucky in pulling particularly crazy, or hormonal women.
It's a minefield out there for women, but there's an awful lot of loose cannons out there for guys to get torn apart by too.