Jokes, Courtesy of the Maxim Mobile Website. *Hope you get a good laugh or two from these funny riddles. * Write to me and tell me which one is your favorite! **
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Hear about the flasher who was thinking of retiring?
He opted to stick it out a while longer.
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How do you turn a fox into an elephant?
A: Marry it.
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Q: What’s the difference between Mick Jagger and a Scotsman?…
A: One says, “Hey, you, get off of my cloud.” The other says, “Hey, McCloud, get off of my ewe.”
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One day the club duffer challenged the local golf pro to a match, with a $500 bet on the side. “But,” said the duffer, “since you’re obviously much better than I am, to even it a bit you have to spot me two ‘gotchas’.” The golf pro didn’t know what a ‘gotcha’ was, but he went along with it. And off they went.
Coming back to the 19th hole, the rest of the club members were amazed to see the golf pro paying the duffer $500. “What happened?”asked one of the members.
“Well,” said the pro, “I was teeing up for the first hole, and as I brought the club down, the jerk stuck his hand up between my legs and grabbed my crotch while yelling ‘Gotcha!’ Have you ever tried to play 18 holes of golf waiting for the second ‘gotcha’?”
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Q: Why do married men gain weight and bachelors don't?
A: Bachelors go to the refrigerator, see nothing they want, then go to bed. Married guys go to the bed, see nothing they want, then go to the refrigerator.
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Laughter really is the best medine! *Have a funny riddle you'd like to share here on my blog? *Please add by commenting below, and have a funny day! *
See more fun jokes, provocative thoughts, comments and questions, plus scintillating tidbits in my LPSG blog here: *
http://www.lpsg.org/blogs/flowerchick/
*****
Hear about the flasher who was thinking of retiring?
He opted to stick it out a while longer.
-----
How do you turn a fox into an elephant?
A: Marry it.
-----
Q: What’s the difference between Mick Jagger and a Scotsman?…
A: One says, “Hey, you, get off of my cloud.” The other says, “Hey, McCloud, get off of my ewe.”
-----
One day the club duffer challenged the local golf pro to a match, with a $500 bet on the side. “But,” said the duffer, “since you’re obviously much better than I am, to even it a bit you have to spot me two ‘gotchas’.” The golf pro didn’t know what a ‘gotcha’ was, but he went along with it. And off they went.
Coming back to the 19th hole, the rest of the club members were amazed to see the golf pro paying the duffer $500. “What happened?”asked one of the members.
“Well,” said the pro, “I was teeing up for the first hole, and as I brought the club down, the jerk stuck his hand up between my legs and grabbed my crotch while yelling ‘Gotcha!’ Have you ever tried to play 18 holes of golf waiting for the second ‘gotcha’?”
-----
Q: Why do married men gain weight and bachelors don't?
A: Bachelors go to the refrigerator, see nothing they want, then go to bed. Married guys go to the bed, see nothing they want, then go to the refrigerator.
******
Laughter really is the best medine! *Have a funny riddle you'd like to share here on my blog? *Please add by commenting below, and have a funny day! *
See more fun jokes, provocative thoughts, comments and questions, plus scintillating tidbits in my LPSG blog here: *
http://www.lpsg.org/blogs/flowerchick/