Blonde Joke Thread

[lucky8]

There were three women who were at the gynecologist having pre-natal checkups The doctor asked the first woman "in what position was the baby conceived ?"

"He was on top ", she replied.
"You will have a boy !" the doctor exclaimed.

The second woman was asked the same question.
"I was on top ", was the reply.
"you will have a baby girl. " said the doctor.

With this, the third women, a blonde, burst into tears.
"What's the matter ?" asked the doc.
"Am I going to have puppies ?"

 

[lucky8]

A young man finally got a date with the blonde female that lived in his apartment complex. To prepare for his big date, the young man went up on to the roof of his apartment building in order to tan himself. Not wanting any tan lines to show, he sunbathed in the nude.
Unfortunately, the young man fell asleep while on the roof and managed to get sunburn on his "tool of the trade". But, he was determined not to miss his date, so he put some lotion on his manhood and wrapped it in gauze.
The blonde showed up for the date at his apartment, and the young man treated her to a home cooked dinner, after which they went into the living room to watch a movie. During the movie, however, the young man's sunburn started acting up again. He asked to be excused, went into the kitchen and poured a tall, cool glass of milk.
He then placed his sunburned member in the milk and experienced immediate relief of his pain. The blonde, however, wondering what he was doing, wandered into the kitchen to see him with his member immersed in a glass of milk.
Upon seeing this, the blonde exclaimed, "So that's how you guys load those things!"

 

[nakedwally]

How do you keep a blonde occupied for hours?

Tell her to alphabetize M&M's

 

[B_JasonDawgxxx]

HEY!!!!!!

 

[nakedwally]

HEY!!!!!!

hay is for horses

 

[B_enter today]

Q: When you go to a restaurant, how do you know which one of the waitresses dyes her hair from blonde to brown?

A: She's the one with a tampon behind her ear wondering where she put her pencil

 

[B_JasonDawgxxx]

hay is for horses

Dinners served

 

[D_Ivana Dickenside]

this one is lame but it's the only joke that sticks out to me at the moment: when the blonde heard that the majority of crimes occur around the house, she moved.

 

[nakedwally]

Dinners served

Well.... I never.. :biggrin1::biggrin1::biggrin1:

 

[BUSTERHYMAN]

Warning Adult Joke.
In a biology class, the professor was discussing the high glucose levels found in semen.

A young blond raised her hand and asked, "If I understand, you're saying there is a lot of glucose, as in sugar, in male semen?"

"That's correct," responded the professor, going on to add statistical info.

Raising her hand again, the girl asked, "Then why doesn't it taste sweet?"

After a stunned silence, the whole class burst out laughing, the poor girl's face turned bright red, and as she realised exactly what she had inadvertently said, she picked up her books without a word and walked out of class... and never returned.

However, as she was going out the door, the professor's reply was classic...

Totally straight-faced he answered her question, "It doesn't taste sweet because the taste-buds for sweetness are on the tip of your tongue and not the back of your throat."