New problem - Can't cum?

[tawxic]

I recently made a post about me not being able to get it up... that problem is gone now, thanks to everyone at lpsg for the support, you guys helped a lot. I ended up just waiting a bit more til I was comfortable with being naked with her, and it just made the whole thing a lot easier.

However, my dilemma is now even more complicated, or at least AS complicated. I find that I cannot cum. It feels good, ya know, but not as good at whackin off, even. I hate to say that, it simply shouldn't be like that... sex > masturbation, am I right?

I think the problem is I can't get all the way in yet. She is very tight, and I have to wear a condom. Personally, I think it's the fact that I am wearing a condom. It feels good, but not good enough to get me off, ya know?

Suggestions/input?

 

[GoneA]

sex > masturbation, am I right?

that seems rather subjective...

i think you still need to get comfortable with her. for what it seems, you don't have a problem ejaculating - just when you're with her you do. have you been with other women? if so, did you have the same problem? this could have something to do with performance [FONT=&quot]anxiety[/FONT].

but what do i know, last time i had sex, condoms were made from leather.

 

[Matthew]

tawxic, stop jacking off for awhile. I'll bet it gets easier to cum while fucking, even with a condom on.

 

[B_horribleperson]

1. no jerking off for 2 weeks

2. you must lay naked next to her naked at least 5-7 times and play with each other, no sex, just touching feeling sucking you get the idea

3. dont think about it.

4. go and have sex

 

[tawxic]

she is the only woman I have been with, and we have had sex 3 times so far.

On a good note, she has cum 2 times each time

I guess it's better to last longer than shorter though.. it would suck if I was ejaculating prematurly.

 

[B_horribleperson]

you could be like me where it takes 50-60 even 70minutes of fucking to cum.

 

[GoneA]

I guess it's better to last longer than shorter though.. it would suck if I was ejaculating prematurly.

i'm glad you get the big picture ... now, that will be enough.

 

[madame_zora]

Tawxic, It takes a while to readjust your expectations from the rougher feel of your own hand during masturbation and the softer grip of a vagina during sex. A decent solution for the short term is just to finish yourself off after she is satisfied, until your dick starts to feel comfortable enough with these new sensations to ejaculate. Sounds perfectly normal to me, I've heard several young guys talk about this when they first start having sex. Nothing to worry about, and you're right that it's a better problem to have than premature ejaculation!

 

[tawxic]

thanks everyone

You are all very helpful, I really do appreciate this forum!

 

[Paul Vincent]

I suspect you're thinking 'I better not cum too quick, have to keep going for as long as I can or she won't enjoy it.'

I used to be like that, and thus the first time I had sex I fucked for about four hours non stop...but then at the end of it the girl I was with gave up, said she was tired and was quite disappointed that I didn't cum. In the morning though we had round two and I wasn't bothered about lasting long.

I came within about ten, maybe even five minutes, and so did she. She was pleased then.

As for you, tawxic maybe you could concentrate on holding off ejaculation for awhile, but then just concentrate on the sensations and the moaning etc? And if you stop masturbating, the longer you stop for, the hornier you will be.

 

[tawxic]

Paul, no, it's not that. I admit the first time I was afraid I would get halfway in and be finished, but she came TWICE our second time, and I wasn't even close, so the third time she came again, and I would have came if that was the issue :-/

 

[Paul Vincent]

Hmm well then I guess practice will make perfect. Could be your shit scared of cumming inside her? I know I was lol.

A few times I'd be ready to cum, pull out and then not cum...and have to get back to what I was doing. Your girl understands I'm sure and she probably enjoys that you ca last quite a while. At least you're not a minute man

 

[Aplus]

At least your not a minute man

I suspect that may be a dilemma a lot of guys have. Not every woman can get-off in 5 or 10 minutes, nor does every guy wanna get-off in that same about of time either. Orgasms don't always work quite that way...at least I don't think they do. Orgasms (for the most part) are selfish releases. I think you have to allow yourself to have them sometimes...no matter what. Getting the correct balance can be tough though.

 

[tawxic]

Well, I'm on day 9 for not masturbating. She was on her period for a while, but I'm pretty sure we're going to go at it tomorrow.

I'll let you all know how it goes. and omg, I've got to do this more often. Forget not having nerve endings, it was caused by over-masturbation. it feels great now, even when I rub it! woohoo

 

[Matthew]

That's awesome news, Tawxic. Glad it's working.

 

[GoneA]

Well, I'm on day 9 for not masturbating. She was on her period for a while, but I'm pretty sure we're going to go at it tomorrow.

I'll let you all know how it goes. and omg, I've got to do this more often. Forget not having nerve endings, it was caused by over-masturbation. it feels great now, even when I rub it! woohoo

told you so.

 

[madame_zora]

told you so.

Such a show off.

 

[GoneA]

Such a show off.

that's not the first time i've been called a shower.

 

[Matthew]

that's not the first time i've been called a shower.

Have you ever been told you need a shower?

 

[GoneA]

Have you ever been told you need a shower?

all the time - why?