The gay thing is interesting

[andrexx]

I actually like the percentage thing. It gives me an idea of where a guy sees himself on the spectrum, a bit of an indicator as to how I might get along with him. While I do admit to getting a kick out of the ones who identify as 100% one way or another while seeming to think predominantly about the "0%," in general, I think self identification has to do with alot more than just sex acts.

I actually enjoy the percentages too. It helps me get a grasp on where a person ranks themselves and therefore how I approach them if I'm talking to them on the profile, in posts, PMs, etc. It's a definite help. That said, I find it hard to believe too many of the men who say they're 100% straight. Too many of them are listed as having viewed my profile (and of course many of the more popular members around here).

 

[Rowan Ravenseed]

so because you get bitched at that means you take the same shit you complain that OTHER PEOPLE DO TO YOU, and turn it on someone else?

so fucking wrong.
if anything, people who get discriminated against should know better.
plain and simple. there is no excuse.

also, most LGBT people claim that THEIR SEXUALITY SHOULDN'T MATTER, but all of a sudden when a person who identifies as 100% straight admits to homosexual fantasies/thoughts/acts their sexuality is the basis of who they are as a person.

it's the pot calling the kettle black.
sexuality shouldn't matter, and if you're in the LGBT community, then you specifically, people who have been there, should be the first to stand up and be supportive of the fact that people should be able to explore sexually, and come out or NOT come out for their own personal reasons.

I agree with you Chris I've never believed in calling a man anything other than what he believes himself to be for me sexual identity is a deeply personal thing that is soley based on a persons own identity... if a man want to call himself str8 and suck cock at the same time then i say let him be... we need more str8 men that suck cock any way.

 

[D_Tim McGnaw]

so because you get bitched at that means you take the same shit you complain that OTHER PEOPLE DO TO YOU, and turn it on someone else?

so fucking wrong.
if anything, people who get discriminated against should know better.
plain and simple. there is no excuse.

also, most LGBT people claim that THEIR SEXUALITY SHOULDN'T MATTER, but all of a sudden when a person who identifies as 100% straight admits to homosexual fantasies/thoughts/acts their sexuality is the basis of who they are as a person.

it's the pot calling the kettle black.
sexuality shouldn't matter, and if you're in the LGBT community, then you specifically, people who have been there, should be the first to stand up and be supportive of the fact that people should be able to explore sexually, and come out or NOT come out for their own personal reasons.

BS. I'm sorry but that's what this post is. Oh and don't lecture me on my responsibilities as a gay person.

Sure sexuality shouldn't matter, that's why dishonesty about it is suspect. It's suspect because we live in a heterocentirc world, in which a huge majority of people still see homosexuality as in some way abnormal. The reason so many self identified completely "straight" guys identify as completely straight inspite of evidence to the contrary is because of this stigma.

Let me be clear, I don't call people out on this kind of thing myself, nor would I, primarily because I don't think other people's lack of honesty with themselves is something I can usefully effect. Nor do I think that it's particularly important to dispute with other member whether they are 1% or 20% gay that's totally subjective and meaningless.

But I do completely understand how irritating it is to read a post by a guy who identifies as 100% straight about how he loves getting blowjobs or handjobs or whatever from other guys. I'm not talking about fantasies which a person has no intention of ever acting on, but real desires to actually have gay sex of one kind or another or actual past enjoyment of gay sex.

Like I've said, gay people and everything about them, even the actual sex they have, have been marginalised, discounted, ignored, oppressed and suppressed, written off and insulted in every way for thousands of years. To read someone completely ignoring, discounting, and diminishing the kinds of sex acts which are part of who I am, some of the most intimate and intense acts I can engage in, and treat them as though they were nothing, not even worthy of a single measly percentage point is annoying. That's why I can fully understand when other gay members express that annoyance, even if I wouldn't bother to myself.

If we accept that there is nothing wrong with being 100% gay, and we accept that being 1% gay would not make you functionally or practically a homosexual, then what is wrong with admitting that some of your actions or desires make you 1% gay ? If I had set my percentages to 100% gay and then went about posting about my heterosexual experiences, my enjoyment of them and my desire to do them again then I would expect someone to call me on it because it would seem as though i viewed heterosexual sex as meaningless or so unimportant that it didn't even qualify for a 1% recognition.

Like I said, I stand over my public information and the posts I make, and will happily defend them to anyone who wants to call me on them. Why should I expect any less from any other member ?

The solution to this dilemma, one used by many members, is not to publish sexuality percentages at all. If you don't want comments on your sexuality then don't publish information about it which might encourage comment.

 

[D_Jared Padalicki]

The world is just turned around here on this forum, all of this isn't really daily life...

 

[drac]

I claim 99% gay and 1% straight for two reasons: (1) About 99.5% of my sexual thoughts and desires concern men, and I am in a permanent same-sex relationship. But (2) I was once not-at-all-unhappily married and sired two delightful children. Even now, just occasionally, about .5% of the time, I fantasize and realize that, were the right situation and the right woman to present themselves for no-strings-attached sex, I would snap up the opportunity in the now-legendary New York minute.

Beyond that:



Hang on just a second...! Are you saying that even if you do you not fantasize about it, you never have sex with yourself...?!? After all, as somebody's frequently seen Signature so wittily puts it, masturbation is sex with someone you love.

But seriously, what you're saying here is reminiscent of some straight men's assertions that the only thing necessary to "cure" Lesbians is for a "good man" to screw them. I know that canard not to be true, and I certainly know that the sexuality of gay men cannot be altered. By the same token I am certain that genuinely straight, non-bi men cannot be "converted." That's not to say, however, that an undetermined number of them can't be steered into the "God, was I drunk last night!" situation. It is, after all, indeed only natural for straight men to harbor a certain amount of curiosity about various forms of male sexuality and other men's sexual equipment, whether they act on it in any way or not. A good case in point is this site, which is replete with self-declared straight men showing off their "credentials" and, one must assume, viewing other men's with interest.

I think this is exactly what i was talking about minus the "if you have sucked a guys dick you are more than 10%gay" First off, any guy that thinks he can turn a lesbian, your stupid, and unfortunately, any girl that thinks she can give better head then a gay guy, you are special if you actually can. That being said, orally same sex is probably physically the best if you are open to it because you are working with people that use the same tools day in day out. What it lacks, is intimacy to the heart, and saying that, what most people define as your sexual orientation is what you have done sexually not how you feel.
Like kaldergrosse mentions his previous marriage, clearly i would think that would be categorized as more than 1%straight, to me it really doesnt matter, just like to argue. But, specifically on this site, gay people, men and women, seem to pronounce that you are gayer than you are, and that you are just hiding your inner feelings because of society and saying you are straighter than you are.
I guess what i am completely trying to say to all, is that if we can accept that kaldergrosse is only 1%straight, having been married with kids, then if a 90% -99%straight guy tells of giving a blow job, getting one, jerking it with buds, or thinking of having his girl use a strap-on with him, and has absolutely no intention of being with a man as a relationship, then he is not more GAY. Just a sexual adventurist, and as most people should do unless they feel other wise is, what happens in a bedroom is only the business of those participating, if you dont want people to know you like to suck a cock every once in a while it's your choice what people know.
And for the record if i was a girl, I would probably be 80/20 leaning towards gay. I love me some pussy, mmmmmmmmmmm

 

[Stephenmass]

If you self identify as straight and you only play with other straight guys and girls then you are straight. :mischievous:

If two "straight guys" are "playing" together, doesn't that mean they are not 100% straight? Sorry guys and gals, but a 100% heterosexual isn't interested AT ALL in the other sex sexually, not even wanking on cam or anything of the sort. And a gal the same, if she is 100% heterosexual she is not interested in watching a women on cam play with herself either and I've never heard of a straight women eating a pussy.

For the bi guys and gals, MY OWN EXPERIENCE is I've yet to meet a bi guy that doesn't prefer their own sex if asked which they like better, the same with women.

So while we may not like labels people, heterosexual implies 100%, homosexual implies 100%, and bi means the percentages (as evidenced here) can vary.

 

[MercyfulFate]

so because you get bitched at that means you take the same shit you complain that OTHER PEOPLE DO TO YOU, and turn it on someone else?

so fucking wrong.
if anything, people who get discriminated against should know better.
plain and simple. there is no excuse.

also, most LGBT people claim that THEIR SEXUALITY SHOULDN'T MATTER, but all of a sudden when a person who identifies as 100% straight admits to homosexual fantasies/thoughts/acts their sexuality is the basis of who they are as a person.

it's the pot calling the kettle black.
sexuality shouldn't matter, and if you're in the LGBT community, then you specifically, people who have been there, should be the first to stand up and be supportive of the fact that people should be able to explore sexually, and come out or NOT come out for their own personal reasons.

Bingo. I mean I was called a homophobe by two people in the Hate Crime thread, all because I don't agree with the idea of Hate Crime legislation. Talk about reactionary idiocy, they couldn't back it up either. It had nothing to do with just homosexual Hate Crimes, it was about all Hate Crime laws.

To discriminate for being discriminated against is quite ass-backwards.

 

[D_Tim McGnaw]

Bingo. I mean I was called a homophobe by two people in the Hate Crime thread, all because I don't agree with the idea of Hate Crime legislation. Talk about reactionary idiocy, they couldn't back it up either. It had nothing to do with just homosexual Hate Crimes, it was about all Hate Crime laws.

To discriminate for being discriminated against is quite ass-backwards.

There speaks a straight white male if ever I read one. Let me guess, you've even used the phrase "it's political correctness gone mad" in earnest ? There isn't any discrimination involved in being annoyed by other people's lack of honesty about themselves. Oh and if you resent the agro you got for being called out on what sounds like an incredibly dubious position on hate crime then why are you trolling that opinion here ?

 

[MercyfulFate]

There speaks a straight white male if ever I read one. Let me guess, you've even used the phrase "it's political correctness gone mad" in earnest ? There isn't any discrimination involved in being annoyed by other people's lack of honesty about themselves. Oh and if you resent the agro you got for being called out on what sounds like an incredibly dubious position on hate crime then why are you trolling that opinion here ?

Methinks someone doesn't understand what trolling is. I brought it up because it's in line with what's being talked about here.

Lack of honesty? See? You don't know what you're talking about either, I mean it was quite simple to shoot down the two who had a knee-jerk reaction already.

PC gone mad? Yeah, it could be seen that way, and yeah I've said it. My reasons for doing so were made quite clear, but I get the impression your mind is already made up, as the same knee-jerk reaction is present here.

 

[D_Relentless Original]

There speaks a straight white male if ever I read one. Let me guess, you've even used the phrase "it's political correctness gone mad" in earnest ? There isn't any discrimination involved in being annoyed by other people's lack of honesty about themselves. Oh and if you resent the agro you got for being called out on what sounds like an incredibly dubious position on hate crime then why are you trolling that opinion here ?

Methinks someone doesn't understand what trolling is. I brought it up because it's in line with what's being talked about here.

Lack of honesty? See? You don't know what you're talking about either, I mean it was quite simple to shoot down the two who had a knee-jerk reaction already.

PC gone mad? Yeah, it could be seen that way, and yeah I've said it. My reasons for doing so were made quite clear, but I get the impression your mind is already made up, as the same knee-jerk reaction is present here.

hey guys, should'nt you two go private, i don't think this arguing is relevant to the thread.

 

[MercyfulFate]

hey guys, should'nt you two go private, i don't think this arguing is relevant to the thread.

Fair enough but it's perfectly relevant, look at his first line.

If I said it and my percentage was 100% gay, guaranteed he would not have responded the same way. Just like the other two. It happened quite clearly when I brought up an op-ed piece about it that was almost identical to my viewpoint, from a lesbian woman.

To discriminate because you've been discriminated against is incredibly silly. I was picked on because of my race throughout my school years and it didn't affect me one bit, if I was to be racist or bigoted because of that then I'd be a giant hypocrite. This is my point.

 

[D_Tim McGnaw]

hey guys, should'nt you two go private, i don't think this arguing is relevant to the thread.

Thanks Tardis, but it wasn't really an argument.

 

[Countryguy63]

I have a question along this same line....

Why do the predominantly / majorly gay (90% and up) men get pounded on less when they say a woman is hot, or (lol) offer to sleep with a woman to get to her husband (lol), than the predominantly / majorly straight (90% and up) men who do similar to other men?
**probably worded terribly, but you get my drift**

 

[voidout]

BS. I'm sorry but that's what this post is. Oh and don't lecture me on my responsibilities as a gay person.

My post isn't BS. It's an opinion...just because you disagree does NOT make my point invalid.

Oh, and I wasn't lecturing you, and I'm sorry it came off that way. I was merely stating what I think people in the LGBT community should act like when it comes to anyone's sexuality, whether they're being honest with themselves or not. It's none of your business. Point blank. It's none of MY business who you're fucking, right? So don't use the same hypocritcal views when it's only convenient for you, and your side of the argument.

If you expect people to be tolerant of you, you have to choose to be tolerant of others opinions and view points even when you don't agree with them. Don't just talk the talk...walk it. Plain and simple.

Besides, the way people IDENTIFY sexually can be very different than what they DO sexually, and many people have different ideas of what sexual orientation can mean to them. I'm not talking text book definition, but personal definition. It's all subjective.

 

[voidout]

Have to agree. Freedom trumps sexuality. As a general rule, freedom trumps everything.

:smile:

I agree with you Chris I've never believed in calling a man anything other than what he believes himself to be for me sexual identity is a deeply personal thing that is soley based on a persons own identity... if a man want to call himself str8 and suck cock at the same time then i say let him be... we need more str8 men that suck cock any way.

LMAO. you WOULD say that, row. It's true, though...you can't call someone a liar on what someone believes themselves to be.

Bingo...

To discriminate for being discriminated against is quite ass-backwards.

Totally agree.

 

[D_Tim McGnaw]

My post isn't BS. It's an opinion...just because you disagree does NOT make my point invalid.

Fair enough, but I never denied your right to express your opinion, I simply made the point that it seemed irrational, ill informed and frankly offensive.

Oh, and I wasn't lecturing you, and I'm sorry it came off that way. I was merely stating what I think people in the LGBT community should act like when it comes to anyone's sexuality, whether they're being honest with themselves or not.

Hold on, in what universe is "stating what [you] think people in the LGBT community should act like when it comes to anyone's sexuality." not lecturing gay people about their responsibilities ?

It's none of your business. Point blank. It's none of MY business who you're fucking, right? So don't use the same hypocritcal views when it's only convenient for you, and your side of the argument.

Now this really is specious. We're talking about people who publish percentages about their sexuality and post about their sexuality and sex life on an adult forum with thousands of members on the Internet. If they didn't want comment about their sexuality and sex lives why are they publishing information about it for all the world to read and comment on ?

And yes, if I publish information for you or anyone else to read about my sexuality then of course I should expect you or anyone else to have an opinion about my publicly vaunted information regarding my sexuality.

Read what I said. I'll repeat, I stand over all and any information I make public about my sexuality and the content of my posts. If someone thinks something I've written or published is horse shit then of course I expect them to challenge me on it. I would have no problem discussing with anyone any detail of the information I make public about myself.

If you expect people to be tolerant of you, you have to choose to be tolerant of others opinions and view points even when you don't agree with them. Don't just talk the talk...walk it. Plain and simple.

Look, you can pretend that me disagreeing with you constitutes me being intolerant of you if you want but it doesn't really wash. In any event I completely resent this notion that I'm expecting anyone's "tolerance", the fact that you would think that confirms your own percentages and makes it quite clear that you really have very little idea what life might be like if you weren't straight.

Equality, does not mean tolerance, or acceptance, on the part of the majority ( i.e. you ) of a minority, it means that the I and you are equals, I don't have to agree with you and you don't have to agree with me, because we are equals we are free to agree or disagree as and when we wish.

Just because I'm gay does not mean I am charged with some greater responsibility to be tolerant of anyone, and frankly I find it offensive that you would presume that I bear a greater responsibility than you do.

Besides, the way people IDENTIFY sexually can be very different than what they DO sexually, and many people have different ideas of what sexual orientation can mean to them. I'm not talking text book definition, but personal definition. It's all subjective.

Calling someone on your own perceptions of how they present themselves publically is not intollerance, it's a natural part of the discourse between human beings.

I already pointed out that I agree with you about the whole issue being extremely subjective, what I find odd is that you don't seem to understand the implied insult that someone who claims to be 100% straight but expresses enjoyment of same sex sex may be perceived as offering to those who are homosexual. You've never actually addressed that point, all you've done is call me intolerant and imply that I bear a greater responsibility to be tolerant than you do. Not much of a position ducky.

 

[voidout]

Fair enough, but I never denied your right to express your opinion, I simply made the point that it seemed irrational, ill informed and frankly offensive.
I don't see how it was ill informed, irrational, or offensive. I never once said you denied me of anything, either.

Hold on, in what universe is "stating what [you] think people in the LGBT community should act like when it comes to anyone's sexuality." not lecturing gay people about their responsibilities ?
Because two paragraphs worth of words wasn't intended on being a "lecture". I already apologized if you thought that it was a terribly uneducated lecture, but it wasn't. I'm so glad you need to make me feel stupid for apologizing even though there probably was no need to, that you had gotten offended over the "lecture" of your "responsibilities". I think it should be everyone's responsibility, however, and I thought that was clear through my posts. I didn't mean to offensively point the finger at LGBT, I was just writing it in reference to the response.


Now this really is specious. We're talking about people who publish percentages about their sexuality and post about their sexuality and sex life on an adult forum with thousands of members on the Internet. If they didn't want comment about their sexuality and sex lives why are they publishing information about it for all the world to read and comment on ?
I just don't see the importance of it. That was my point. I think it's petty to get down on someone because they put "0%" gay, or even "10%" gay if they don't themselves see it that way...

Oh, and yes, it is public, but I have a funny feeling that if a woman who wrote about how she got an abortion, and she was flooded with messages such as "MURDERER" you'd be singing a different tune on whether she deserves it or not.

And yes, if I publish information for you or anyone else to read about my sexuality then of course I should expect you or anyone else to have an opinion about my publicly vaunted information regarding my sexuality.

Read what I said. I'll repeat, I stand over all and any information I make public about my sexuality and the content of my posts. If someone thinks something I've written or published is horse shit then of course I expect them to challenge me on it. I would have no problem discussing with anyone any detail of the information I make public about myself.
Yes, I heard you...I am far from illiterate, thank you for being patronizing, though. I sincerely appreciate it.


Look, you can pretend that me disagreeing with you constitutes me being intolerant of you if you want but it doesn't really wash. In any event I completely resent this notion that I'm expecting anyone's "tolerance", the fact that you would think that confirms your own percentages and makes it quite clear that you really have very little idea what life might be like if you weren't straight.
A) The fact that you were disagreeing with me was not my point in mentioning tolerance.
B) You don't want to see people be tolerant of the LGBT community? Interesting...
C) You clearly have a chip on your shoulder about straight people, if you're making such an outrageous claim that you think me being straight has ANYTHING to do with my opinion on the subject. Other gay memebers of this site have agreed with my post, so if anyone is being offensive, it's you for telling my I'm being ignorant because I'm "100% straight".
D) You're right. I didn't see my best friend throughout middle school, high school, and now college struggle with his sexual identity. Infact, I've never had a gay friend in my life! You must know me so well. It's amazing.

Equality, does not mean tolerance, or acceptance, on the part of the majority ( i.e. you ) of a minority, it means that the I and you are equals, I don't have to agree with you and you don't have to agree with me, because we are equals we are free to agree or disagree as and when we wish.
Ugh. But AGREEING to accept that someone has a different viewpoint on sexual identity, for example since we're referring to that, IS BEING TOLERANT (AKA - tolerance - Definition from the Merriam-Webster Online Dictionary TO ALLOW SOMETHING TO BE, AKA - TO ACCEPT IT...).

Just because I'm gay does not mean I am charged with some greater responsibility to be tolerant of anyone, and frankly I find it offensive that you would presume that I bear a greater responsibility than you do.
Again, I thought it was clear, since ME being a horribly ignorant 100% straight woman, was speaking on my opinion, that you would assume that I did not just mean your community, but everyone.

Oh, and fuck yeah, you SHOULD know better than to be so disgustingly emphasized on sexual identity when you have been ridiculed for the same exact thing. Yes, I will stand firmly by that statement, and not apologize for it whether you're offended or not. Tough. If you don't like to eat your own hypocritical standpoint on the subject, then don't shit it out. (*Please note that when I say "you" I am not meaning YOU specifically.)

If another community, race, person, religion, etc. was saying something or practiced certain beliefs and doing or saying another in certain instances, then I'd expect anyone to call it out, too. Don't take it as a personal insult on you and your community. I just am a personal fan of practice as you preach. :shrug:

Calling someone on your own perceptions of how they present themselves publically is not intollerance, it's a natural part of the discourse between human beings.
AGAIN...not my point. When I mentioned tolerance I was referring to the fact that if you want people to be tolerant of a gay man, then you need to be tolerant of a straight man who is not ready to come out yet.

I already pointed out that I agree with you about the whole issue being extremely subjective, what I find odd is that you don't seem to understand the implied insult that someone who claims to be 100% straight but expresses enjoyment of same sex sex may be perceived as offering to those who are homosexual. You've never actually addressed that point, all you've done is call me intolerant and imply that I bear a greater responsibility to be tolerant than you do. Not much of a position ducky.
If you agreed it was subjective, and truly believed that, we wouldn't be having this discussion at all. Yes I did address the issue, but in the time you decided to take everything as a personal attack on you, you've failed to see it.

Let me make it clear for you on my thoughts: the world doesn't revolve around you. Not everything is a personal offense. You have some nerve being insulted by the sexuality of another person. Who do you think you are? The grand chief of what defines people as being homosexual or not? Please...

Going back to the calling you intolerant...
I didn't once accuse you of anything...at all.
I was simply saying that if PEOPLE in the WORLD want tolerance, they need to show it. The golden rule, my friend. Do unto others. It was a generalization that you took too personally.

Yep. I think that covers it.

 

[voidout]

To discriminate because you've been discriminated against is incredibly silly. I was picked on because of my race throughout my school years and it didn't affect me one bit, if I was to be racist or bigoted because of that then I'd be a giant hypocrite. This is my point.

THANK. YOU. +1111111111111111111111111

i've been discriminated against because i'm a woman, white, straight, and i've watched many of my friends go through the same thing for just about every possible way a human being can be discriminated against. it's not like i'm saying my opinion because i've never been in the situation or seen someone in the situation before.

if we were talking about child molestors, who were abused as children and now do the same thing, this argument would be going a completely different way, but it's the same basic principle.

 

[Surfer12]

I think christina's opinion makes sense in this argument!

 

[voidout]

I think christina's opinion makes sense in this argument!

why thank you, sir.