I wonder why people lie. If you care about someone, you don't lie to them. If you don't care about someone, why lie to them?
In response to IKnowKK...if someone is in an "unhealthy" relationship, won't the cycle continue? So in that relationship and future ones you won't be 100% as happy or successful as you could be. Everyone should reach a point where they resolve to tell the truth. Honesty is the best policy.
If you can`t be honest with your spouse than you`re married to a stranger. As far as my relationship goes, nothing is hidden from her, as a matter of fact i`d rather she be upset from the truth than me live a lie. Many times people will only tell half of the truth and the way i see it, half truths are still a lie no matter how you look at it.
lafever
ScaredLittleBoy:
And there are better things to put in your mouth KK. For shame! :wink:
That's where the part about "don't do things you feel you will have to lie about" comes in. I don't really care how much I "want" something, if I can't be honest with my partner about it, I just don't do it.But that is all about things in your past.
What about omissions of things hallening now or in the future?
That's a better phrasing of what I tried to say in my first post about both people involved needing to be strong enough to handle an honest relationship.Honesty is a 2-way street. If one partner gets upset hearing the truth, then the other is hesitant to tell the truth in the future. Personally, I like sharing everything. It gives a feeling of closeness.
How important is honesty in a relationship? Do you tell your partner everything you should or do you withhold certain things because you know it will upset them? Do you consider lying by ommission to be lying?
For me honesty is the foundation of a relationship, if someone lies to me about one thing it throws everything they say into doubt, and I know that if something comes up where it's really important that I believe them if they've lied in the past that will colour everything they say to me.
I think a relationship has to be based on trust. If you havn't got that then there is not much else really that you could call a good relationship. My female work colleague is always telling me how honest her husband is, but whenever she tells me of something she has done that he would disapprove of it's "don't tell my husband" or "just make something up if he asks you". Plus, how does she know he is honest? If he is then she doesn't deserve this honesty!My ex husband had a lot of trouble telling the truth too Meg, when he got found out, as he always did, he never seemed to understand that the hassle I gave him wasn't because of whatever trivial thing he'd done, but because he'd lied to me yet again.
I suppose some kids grow up to do as their parents did but I also hear of many who see the problems of their parents and do completely the opposite. I don't know whether it always has an effect. It is always best to do as you expect your kids to do though I agree.Honesty is one of the things we try to teach our kids, how can they learn honest if they see their parents lie?
How important is honesty in a relationship?
Yup, it's true I never forget things like that but I don't think I should. It's a natural defense mechanism.Extremely! I could never date or even be friends with anyone whom I considered to be dishonest.
Do you tell your partner everything you should or do you withhold certain things because you know it will upset them? I have been known to hold back inconsequential things if I thought it would hurt him. Do you consider lying by ommission to be lying? No, I do not; but he certainly did! :redface: He called it a sin of omission, and considered it to be a cardinal sin as opposed to a venial sin.
My sin of omission- I neglected to tell him that I chose not to go to church one Sunday during the blizzard of 1994. He of course ignored the bishops dictate to stay home and walked 3 miles through the snow and ice because no trolleys or cabs were running. :headache::angryfire2:
For me honesty is the foundation of a relationship, if someone lies to me about one thing it throws everything they say into doubt, agreed and I know that if something comes up where it's really important that I believe them if they've lied in the past that will colour everything they say to me.