Dating Bodybuilders

[AsherStClaire]

Ok, I've (38yo Male) decided to fully embrace my attraction to muscular men and I'm making several lifestyle choices to better increase my odds of pursuing them. This is going to be a couple-years long endeavor but the time is gonna pass anyway so why not try?

I'm not too concerned with where to find these types of men, but I'm more wondering how y'all approached these kinds of guys in the first place. Like, how did y'all ingratiate yourself into the types of spaces where you could encounter these kinds of men in the first place?

I'm not a masculine man, but I have an imposing physique that can be a bit intimidating until I open my mouth (then the purse falls out). I have no problem being "myself" (I can't pass for straight or masc and don't particularly want to try to pass as such) I've learned how to comfortably exist in potentially hostile spaces as a gay man. What I don't know is how to actually talk, flirt, engage with these types of men.

I'm not approaching this from a fetishistic perspective, I truly find muscular/bodybuilder physiques attractive in their own right.

But I guess what I'm asking is how you engaged with these types of men when you finally gained access to them. If you are a bodybuilder, what were you looking for in a partner if physique wasn't the biggest priority

 

[LPSG Simon]

I'm not too concerned with where to find these types of men,

Sounds like you know where you're doing this already, but you didn't mention where you have in mind. I think suggestions depend on that.

If it's at the gym, I'd do it by asking for advice. I think once you get a laugh or a good joke between yourself and them, it gets easier and you go from there.

 

[AsherStClaire]

Sounds like you know where you're doing this already, but you didn't mention where you have in mind. I think suggestions depend on that.

If it's at the gym, I'd do it by asking for advice. I think once you get a laugh or a good joke between yourself and them, it gets easier and you go from there.

That would've been great information to include wouldn't it, lol? My apologies, I'm in the US, specifically Maryland on the east coast.

Asking for advice actually is a good idea! There was a bodybuilder in the gym yesterday who was HUGE but he was squatting with relatively light weight for what his physique imlpied. I really want to ask him how he got so big with such light weight. I think I'll do that next time....or whenever I work up the nerve.

I've been thinking about starting to attend powerlifting meets once I get strong enough. I've also been thinking about just seeing if there are any actual queer lifting spaces in my area.

I thought about going to bodybuilder meets/events but I think those spaces might be too overwhelming for me and I don't wanna come across as someone trying to be a "sponsor".

 

[Southernboisb]

Ok, I've (38yo Male) decided to fully embrace my attraction to muscular men and I'm making several lifestyle choices to better increase my odds of pursuing them. This is going to be a couple-years long endeavor but the time is gonna pass anyway so why not try?

I'm not too concerned with where to find these types of men, but I'm more wondering how y'all approached these kinds of guys in the first place. Like, how did y'all ingratiate yourself into the types of spaces where you could encounter these kinds of men in the first place?

I'm not a masculine man, but I have an imposing physique that can be a bit intimidating until I open my mouth (then the purse falls out). I have no problem being "myself" (I can't pass for straight or masc and don't particularly want to try to pass as such) I've learned how to comfortably exist in potentially hostile spaces as a gay man. What I don't know is how to actually talk, flirt, engage with these types of men.

I'm not approaching this from a fetishistic perspective, I truly find muscular/bodybuilder physiques attractive in their own right.

But I guess what I'm asking is how you engaged with these types of men when you finally gained access to them. If you are a bodybuilder, what were you looking for in a partner if physique wasn't the biggest priority

When you find out, let us know!

Personally, I've wondered how many were bottoms.

 

[Southernboisb]

When you find out, let us know!

Personally, I've wondered how many were bottoms.

I don't know if this was from porn, a story, or my imagination/dream...but I asked that because of scene with a bodybuilder bottoming going "give me that protein!".

 

[DragonZeph]

When you find out, let us know!

Personally, I've wondered how many were bottoms.

Back in my early twenties, I used to date this huge Black bodybuilder who was in his early thirties at the time. He was a total power bottom, and there was something incredibly hot about seeing a man that big and imposing so eager to take dick.

 

[AsherStClaire]

When you find out, let us know!

Personally, I've wondered how many were bottoms.

from what I've seen and been told a fair amount apparently.

 

[Antoo22a]

from what I've seen and been told a fair amount apparently.

I think a lot are both, good top and good bottom

 

[MarkusScott]

The only advice that you need is...

Be confident in who you are. Be sincere in your approach. Don't fawn as though they're out of your league. And don't be surprised when they're equally attracted to you. Through preconceptions (They are all bottoms, tops, subs, doms, etc.) out the door. Just move naturally.

They are just as nervous as you are when it comes to the dating side of life.

 

[m1000]

I really want to ask him how he got so big with such light weight.

- I dont think thats a good idea.


Ask him if he knows where the next competition.
Has he been to Mr. Olympia?
What bodybuilder would he like to see naked?
What percentage of boybuilders do you think?
Do you 'edge'?
Can he fill out a posing suit?


;-)

Good luck

 

[AsherStClaire]

I really want to ask him how he got so big with such light weight.

- I dont think thats a good idea.


Ask him if he knows where the next competition.
Has he been to Mr. Olympia?
What bodybuilder would he like to see naked?
What percentage of boybuilders do you think?
Do you 'edge'?
Can he fill out a posing suit?


;-)

Good luck

So you think it'd be a good idea to go up to a complete stranger, in a public setting and them insanely invasive personal and overtly sexual questions....and you think that's gonna get me a positive outcome?

Yeah...I'm gonna pass on that advice.
Thanks though.

 

[m1000]

There's nothing wrong in asking a bodybuilder about a competition.

Of course Im not asking about 'edging'.

 

[dana2]

A couple things:

Many of the really huge bodybuilders are on steroids. I love fit men but find the huge bodybuilders artificial looking and the steroids may make them aggressive and not nice.

Although there are exceptions, people generally will be attracted to people with a similar level of attractiveness, fitness and fashion sense to themselves. In other words if you want a muscley guy, go to the gym more and get muscles yourself (but DON'T do steroids). That will increase your chances of bedding a muscle guy.

 

[oldbutfitinsg]

I hope you don't mind this from a straight perspective, but honestly, as someone who works out quite regularly at the gym, but is nowhere near a bodybuilder's size, the best way to approach them is to get to know them first. I find that all bodybuilders are cool with sharing tips and advice with one another and I have befriended both gay and straight guys. I say do that and take it from there.

 

[AsherStClaire]

A couple things:

Many of the really huge bodybuilders are on steroids. I love fit men but find the huge bodybuilders artificial looking and the steroids may make them aggressive and not nice.

Although there are exceptions, people generally will be attracted to people with a similar level of attractiveness, fitness and fashion sense to themselves. In other words if you want a muscley guy, go to the gym more and get muscles yourself (but DON'T do steroids). That will increase your chances of bedding a muscle guy.

I love the big ones the most, if I'm being honest. The mass monsters are my favorite .
But all joking aside, I've prepared myself for dealing with their potential roid usage.

And you're right, I'm already in the gym working on putting together the best physique I can. Like I said in my original post, I'm looking at a multi-year process to likely get where I want to be. I'm prepared for that as well.

Thanks for your input! I really appreciate it.

 

[AsherStClaire]

I hope you don't mind this from a straight perspective, but honestly, as someone who works out quite regularly at the gym, but is nowhere near a bodybuilder's size, the best way to approach them is to get to know them first. I find that all bodybuilders are cool with sharing tips and advice with one another and I have befriended both gay and straight guys. I say do that and take it from there.

I don't mind at all and thank you for your input, I think I'm going to put it to use! I'm working on building up the nerve to approach someone in the future. That'll probably have to wait until month 3 or so. I'm still working on making being in the gym a natural part of my routine.

Thanks again!

 

[DerrickRigg]

Not sure what advice I can give you.

I started bodybuilding and boxing when I was younger. Enjoyed both, but had to give up boxing less than two years later after my dad passed. Our family couldn't afford the costs anymore, so I just stuck with going to the gym. That got me into hardcore bodybuilding from people I knew and telling them what I wanted to accomplish in the sport. I guess conversation and sharing of ideas does help what you are looking for.