I Need Tips With A Friend!

[WildCub]

You’ll see, I’m secretly gay, no one in my town knows. I’ve been friends with a guy for like 4 years now and I’m really sexually attracted to him, the thing is he is straight and he thinks I’m too. We always play like we are “a couple” he touches my nipples, grabs my ass and my crotch, and so do I, but we do it like we are playing. He always jokes with me like he is going to “fuck me”. What I wanna know is if there is any chance to have sex with him, that’s all I want. I have a lot of fantasies with him, I really, REALLY want him to fuck me, but I don’t know how to make that happen. Oh, and also, he has a girlfriend.

 

[693987]

Well... Do you want to be a homewrecker and/or potentially lose him as a friend? That's what is at stake if you take it beyond the playful behavior you have with your friend.

 

[thickbit]

HAve you ever considered to coming out to him? It could be a dealbreaker - if he is your best friend - he will accept it. If he is in interest in you sexually he could have a move. But - from your words - I sense he is only just fooling around as a friend. I guess if you have the move on sexual territoty he would be dissapear. But this is my opinion.
And - dont get me wrong - but I guess your attraction toward him grows from that you are always together and because you are closeted, you dont have a chance to know other guys around you who gays.
What are we desire? What we could see every day...

 

[purepilot73]

The way the two of you play with each other tells me there is something more on both sides. Next time he says he’s gonna fuck your, pull down your pants and bend over.

 

[Cum_is_Great]

The way you two play with each other gives me no feeling if him being secretly gay nor wanting to get in your pants. I think he's playful and relaxed around you. Unfortunately after comimg out to him he will probably stop because now he thinks there is a real chance you want to get fucked and doesn't want to throw wrong signals.

He has a girlfriend. Red flag to trying anything with him. He's taken. Let it be and keep a good friendship. Yes it sucks, I know. But is a booty call worth losing him as a friend?

 

[Gj816]

Imho I going a different route. None of my straight friends have ever grabbed my dick or acted like they were going to fuck me.

I think he's probably curious. And my question is, does he do this playful grabbing in front of his girlfriend? And if so what does she think?

Boyfriends and girlfriends unless they are totally committed long term, are usually just a passing fling. Friendships can last a lifetime.

Does this kind of playing only happen when you are both drinking or otherwise inebriated? Or all the time?

 

[deleted897665]

You’ll see, I’m secretly gay, no one in my town knows. I’ve been friends with a guy for like 4 years now and I’m really sexually attracted to him, the thing is he is straight and he thinks I’m too. We always play like we are “a couple” he touches my nipples, grabs my ass and my crotch, and so do I, but we do it like we are playing. He always jokes with me like he is going to “fuck me”. What I wanna know is if there is any chance to have sex with him, that’s all I want. I have a lot of fantasies with him, I really, REALLY want him to fuck me, but I don’t know how to make that happen. Oh, and also, he has a girlfriend.

I agree with @Gj816. NONE of my guy friends have touched my nipples, or have grabbed my ass or crouch. And NONE have insinuated they were going to fuck me. I think your friend is pushing the boundaries hard, and may very well be gay, or at a minimum, bi. I think the next time this “playfulness” takes place, you should address the issue.

 

[WildCub]

I agree with @Gj816. NONE of my guy friends have touched my nipples, or have grabbed my ass or crouch. And NONE have insinuated they were going to fuck me. I think your friend is pushing the boundaries hard, and may very well be gay, or at a minimum, bi. I think the next time this “playfulness” takes place, you should address the issue.

Imho I going a different route. None of my straight friends have ever grabbed my dick or acted like they were going to fuck me.

I think he's probably curious. And my question is, does he do this playful grabbing in front of his girlfriend? And if so what does she think?

Boyfriends and girlfriends unless they are totally committed long term, are usually just a passing fling. Friendships can last a lifetime.

Does this kind of playing only happen when you are both drinking or otherwise inebriated? Or all the time?

His girlfriend has never seen him touching me, she goes to a different college than us, so he is constantly texting, and sometimes he send her voice messages telling her that he is going to make me his “second girlfriend” but she laughs about it. Also, we don’t have this kind of “playful moments” all the time, sometimes we have normal talks like every one else, and also, when we have those kinda moments, most of them have happened sober, even at school in front of people.

 

[WildCub]

HAve you ever considered to coming out to him? It could be a dealbreaker - if he is your best friend - he will accept it. If he is in interest in you sexually he could have a move. But - from your words - I sense he is only just fooling around as a friend. I guess if you have the move on sexual territoty he would be dissapear. But this is my opinion.
And - dont get me wrong - but I guess your attraction toward him grows from that you are always together and because you are closeted, you dont have a chance to know other guys around you who gays.
What are we desire? What we could see every day...

I’m afraid to come out to him, or any one else, I know I’m wrong with this, but where I live things are very complicated for gay people and thats scares me

 

[WildCub]

The way the two of you play with each other tells me there is something more on both sides. Next time he says he’s gonna fuck your, pull down your pants and bend over.

I may not be brave enough to pull down my pants, I’m nervous of making a move that will scare him and make him stop being my friend. If I ever make a move I would like to be sutil, so he can make a move after me also, but I don’t know how

 

[bkbll2010]

I would definitely tread lightly. Yes you could come out to him, and risk as some of the posters said above. Your best bet may be to try and jerk off to open somehow with him, but if you do don’t make the first move...

 

[WildCub]

I would definitely tread lightly. Yes you could come out to him, and risk as some of the posters said above. Your best bet may be to try and jerk off to open somehow with him, but if you do don’t make the first move...

I dont think jerking off in front of him would be something good, maybe he would be scared, I would like to insinuate myself so he can do another move and we would take it further

 

[fbneros]

When you are alone with him talk to him. Ask him that what he is thinking about gay sex, about gay people, if he is curious about that thing. This could be a hint for you.

 

[hzs3fg]

I may not be brave enough to pull down my pants, I’m nervous of making a move that will scare him and make him stop being my friend. If I ever make a move I would like to be sutil, so he can make a move after me also, but I don’t know how

Okay, then next time just say, "Go for it!"

The idea is to see what his next move is.

 

[rtg]

His behaviour doesn’t sound like he’s exactly straight to me... I’m not aware of any straight men who do that. My girlfriends and I also do not touch each other’s breasts or grab each others asses and say we want to fuck each other.

Consider coming out to him, but weigh up the potential consequences. And who knows, maybe his gf is his beard?

 

[Matt_x]

He's more than likely bi curious, definitely don't get groped by my best friend nor pretend either of us is going to fuck each other.

Is there anyone that you both know that is openly gay in your community. If y'all see him passing by one day, strike up a conversation. What do you think about him? Go into details maybe, paint a scenario "what if".

 

[693987]

I can't say any of the men I've known who did the whole (and I mean this in as non-offensive a way as possible) "gay chicken" thing or who were that touchy feely with other men ever ended up continuing to claim heterosexuality in the long term. They all came out at various points as gay or bisexual or pansexual etc. Still, he may potentially as unwilling to leave the closet as you are. Or he is genuinely heterosexual, which loops back to do you want to be a home wrecker.

 

[Gj816]

His girlfriend has never seen him touching me, she goes to a different college than us, so he is constantly texting, and sometimes he send her voice messages telling her that he is going to make me his “second girlfriend” but she laughs about it. Also, we don’t have this kind of “playful moments” all the time, sometimes we have normal talks like every one else, and also, when we have those kinda moments, most of them have happened sober, even at school in front of people.

Ok, clears it up for me. He wants to experiment with you.

 

[WildCub]

Okay, then next time just say, "Go for it!"

The idea is to see what his next move is.

I will try that

 

[WildCub]

Ok, clears it up for me. He wants to experiment with you.

Really? And what do you think I should do?