Reluctant Bottom

[SandraSmithCarver]

It Really Horrible!

 

[2322]

Yeah, it's one of the reasons gay people marvel when others claim their sexuality was a choice. Nobody in their right mind would choose what we go through.

It all sounds very complicated, it must be rough being a Gay man

 

[2322]

Very true. I apologize for making it appear otherwise. I know committed couples who just have oral even though they used to enjoy anal sex.

I want to add that it was not easy to become versatile. Even after I decided that I wanted to experience bottoming, it was not easy. I had to learn how to prep, relax, and what felt good for me and what did not. Good luck with that. There can be a lot of pleasure in being on the receiving end.

There's no need to apologize. My comment wasn't directed at you.

There are a lot of complex reasons I want to do it. The hard part is finding a person and place where I feel safe exploring it. Much of why I want to be able to do it is because I want to be able to give that to another person, to offer him the joy that I know I receive in penetrating and releasing myself within him. That's something I want to share with a person I love though I acknowledge that I will need to learn how to do it with other men first.

There is another reason but I can't quite talk about that yet.

 

[Lex]

There's no need to apologize. My comment wasn't directed at you.

I know I just wanted to clarify.

There are a lot of complex reasons I want to do it. The hard part is finding a person and place where I feel safe exploring it. Much of why I want to be able to do it is because I want to be able to give that to another person, to offer him the joy that I know I receive in penetrating and releasing myself within him. That's something I want to share with a person I love though I acknowledge that I will need to learn how to do it with other men first.

There is another reason but I can't quite talk about that yet.

One piece of advice--start small--as you find the right person--try finger play-slowly--before you ever move to putting anything else back there. And realize that it will take several attempts over a period of time to get there. Good luck.


HUGS

 

[Bbucko]

It all sounds very complicated, it must be rough being a Gay man

It's not really all that complicated. Trust me when I say that such things are qualified and negotiated very early on, along with HIV status. Practice makes perfect :biggrin1:.

The most important thing is knowing what you want and how and where to find it. Everything else is just small-talk.

One learns this through trial-and-error. When I was in my early 20s, I met a beautiful man who suited my emotional needs very well. As he was not into anal we were oral-only. The stresses that ended the relationship weren't really sexual: he became addicted to Valium; but we were together for over four years.

 

[Hellboy0]

... might enjoy a good smacking,:biggrin1::wink: but I'm not going to be a reluctant bottom boy.

Fair enuf...then let the smackings begin!!!:biggrin1:

You're funny, Italian! Talk flirty to me anytime.

 

[Primal_Savage]

It all sounds very complicated, it must be rough being a Gay man

It can get a hell of a lot more complicated if you're a bisexual who's constantly switching and professing to be str8 except to those that know differently. :biggrin1:

 

[Lex]

It's not really all that complicated. Trust me when I say that such things are qualified and negotiated very early on, along with HIV status. Practice makes perfect :biggrin1:.

The most important thing is knowing what you want and how and where to find it. Everything else is just small-talk.

...

Thanks for adding those points. I've been trying to say it and not getting it across successfully.

 

[Bbucko]

Thanks for adding those points. I've been trying to say it and not getting it across successfully.

Leave it to me to always bring HIV back into the picture

 

[B_Italian1]

It's not really all that complicated. Trust me when I say that such things are qualified and negotiated very early on, along with HIV status. Practice makes perfect :biggrin1:.

It seems complicated for heteros because we don't approach it that way. As far as HIV goes, you are honest about it, but many people are not.

 

[Bbucko]

It seems complicated for heteros because we don't approach it that way. As far as HIV goes, you are honest about it, but many people are not.

That's why it is each person's individual responsibility to protect his/her own health, regardless of what is discussed. Condoms are not optional for anyone who is HIV negative outside of a long-term, mutually exclusive relationship.

Some people lie. Many do not know their status: most aren't even really clear on what constitutes at-risk behavior. No one can be responsible for maintaining the negative status of another.