The Secret Fetish of a Black Girl

[185248]

There is a chance of that with many fetishes and fantasies. Like most, you would have to have eachothers full trust. Not all fetishes or fantasy are for everyone.

 

[Cylus]

I echo a lot the sentiments expressed here.

Each person is aroused differently. I see nothing wrong or damaging with what Rommette wants. I feel the speculation as to whether or not she was abused or affected in some way is just... speculation and it detracts from the original question--how does Rommette go about finding guys into her kink?

Keeping in mind

I should be straightforward and say that I haven't had sex in almost two years.

All the advice I have is keep your eye out for a guy you feel comfortable enough asking, Rommette. Convince em you love a dirty mouth in the bedroom.

 

[nicenycdick]

One last thought...

DON'T choose a guy who actually believes the words you fantasize about hearing. In other words, make sure that, for him, it is simply role-playing. I suspect that it could get too deep and become very dangerous mentally (or physically, for that matter) if he was involved because it was the way he really felt about black women.

I suggest looking for a 59 year old, professional Italian gentleman from NYC with some public performance experience. Hmmm...now where could we find one of those?

 

[tiggerpoo]

Welcome back Rommette. What a gorgeous woman you are.

Nothing wrong with your fetish. My gf is black and has had terrible experiences with black guys she has dated. So, in a sense, she is similar to you. But her heart throb is Chris Brown - she creams her panties over him. So, she doesn't have a blanket condemnation of black guys. Just black guys from the hood.

But she also has fetishes like yours. She loves me to be rough, pull her hair, half strangle her, smack her booty, talk dirty and call her a motherf**ing Ni**&er.

I find that all that VERY difficult to do - it's completely out of character for me. She's giving me training sessions and we have many laughs.

Train your bf.
Lots of love

Tigger.

 

[twoton]

I find that all that VERY difficult to do - it's completely out of character for me. She's giving me training sessions and we have many laughs.

I couldn't do it. :redface:

One way try would be to find a guy you're interested in and bring it up gently, after you've had some experiences together. My wife was into some bondage play-- and she brought it into the relationship slowly, kind of like, "Have you ever....?" "Would you ever consider.....?" "Do you think it's weird that I like....?" But before she opened the conversation there was the whole foundation of trust and genuine commitment to one another.

Other than that, go for it. I don't see anything wrong with having a fetish like yours. In fact, I'd be willing to bet most fetishes spring from people's attraction to taboo (call me Capt. Obvious.) It's because it's "bad" that you want to explore it. How far can you push the "bad" boundary and still come back o.k. to the real world? That's what my armchair psychology degree has to say.

 

[TrueShot]

But her heart throb is Chris Brown - she creams her panties over him. So, she doesn't have a blanket condemnation of black guys. Just black guys from the hood.

That Chris Brown is such a squeaky clean guy...

 

[rob_just_rob]

Don't feel ashamed of your fetish. Plenty of people get off on saying, hearing, or doing things during sex that they'd hate, or be appalled by, in a nonsexual/nonscene situation.

 

[BigBen]

Calling me the "N" word would be abhorent, repugnant! I have never had a man utter any racial slurs in the bedroom. Yes, I said to one of my suitors in the heat of passion, "fuck me, white man!" He was not offended.

OK, I admit, I am an admirer of the vanilla-chocolate syndrome. My white suitors are the vanilla, and since I am a black woman, I am the chocolate.

They love hearing those words; it is a fantasy for them and for me.

I've been approached by many women who had "heard stories" from their friends and family members. I've had women see me in public and gather their courage and approach me. I've had women see me, get my license plate, and track me down, and I've had "stalkers" too. I mention this part about women seeing me in public, (and no the ladies who were "referred" and told about me) and approaching me only because it seems that many of the most forward or bold ladies were black. But of the women who I've been with, since it's germaine to this thread, many were, and are black. My ethnicity, or theirs, or the colors of our skin, was not brought up in any way except that the size of my endowment being larger than any they had seen is always mentioned. The white and hispanic women say the same comments so it's not really any different. Personally, a clean, fun, nice lady with a happy personality who has a strong sex drive and owns a giant pussy that is willing to at least try and loves being stretched is all I need. Hairy pussies and big tits are nice bonuses as well as all the other feminine traits.

 

[1kmb1]

Ok, now I've stayed away from posting for the last few months. I've logged on to see how everyone is doing but this is something that I absolutely need to post.

Many of you that I've known over the years know that I went to predominately white school. I went into college liking only black men and through a series of horrible experiences with black men and making friends in college with almost all white people I left far different then when I went in. By the time I graduated I had absolutely no sexual attraction to black men and I've only been attracted to whites.

I should be straightforward and say that I haven't had sex in almost two years. I went through a lot with my last boyfriend a couple of years ago in which I asked many of you for advice. I've talked to white men but recently I've had this fetish.

Now don't judge me for this. What is my fetish? I fantasize of sex with a white guy. But not just "normal" sex with a white guy. I've in fact had sex with TWO white guys I met through LPSG (but those stories are for another time). I however fantasize of having sex with a white guy and he calls me racial slurs. I especially get aroused at the thought of him calling me a Nig**r. You get what I'm saying here. I want him to say this stuff while he's dominant and "man handles" me during sex.

I feel so bad for wanting a white guy to have sex with me and say these things. I've looked over the internet for "race play" porn and I can't find any. I've found some with a white woman and black male but none with a black woman (like myself) and a white male. I think maybe it's too taboo because of slavery and the fact that white men would rape black women because black slaves were considered property of the white man. I did come across some stuff from Mollena. For more info about her and race-play there's an article here: When Prejudice Is Sexy: Inside the Kinky World of Race-Play

When I do get in a relationship with a white guy I have no idea how to tell him I want him to say this stuff to me. I'm even more afraid of what he would think of me. Then there's the issue of what if he says no. Most white men would never go there for fear of being looked at as a racist. I know he wouldn't be racist though.

Now before any of you go off and tell me I have some psychological issues I need to get resolved I will tell you that I don't. If a white guy ever called me a racial slur on the street I would punch him in the face. But in the bedroom it's a different story. I want him to be rough and call me all sorts of names.

I think we all deserve to play out our fetishes in the bedroom. I just wanted to see what you all thought about my fetish. Are lots of guys into this type of stuff. Of course I want to know what you women think of me. Well, advice?

are there any sexual fetishes that would be acceptable to do to strangers on the street?

 

[Jello404]

I'd never let someone call me that. Simply because I don't like to bring attention to the obvious contrast if I'm with a white guy. I'm the "we're all the same" kumbayah type.
Because when I'm called a nigger IRL,that shit hurts and it's degrading and I'd always worry that I'm with a white dude who really sees me as a worthless nigger. Sub human. And he'll get off On it and tell his friends what he did. isnt in love,wouldnt marry you. you really are a nigger to him. That's horrible.

Have your fun with your fetish,just be careful that you aren't with someone who really see you as some nigger woman he's screwing around with. You deserve sooooo much better than that!

So have fun with your race play,just be super careful

 

[EboniGoddess]

Hey everyone, thank you for the advice. Many of you seem to have questions whether something in my past has triggered this fetish. I can say that nothing has. I fantacize about being called dirty names during rough sex so why should certain degrading names be off guard?

One last thought...

DON'T choose a guy who actually believes the words you fantasize about hearing. In other words, make sure that, for him, it is simply role-playing. I suspect that it could get too deep and become very dangerous mentally (or physically, for that matter) if he was involved because it was the way he really felt about black women.

I suggest looking for a 59 year old, professional Italian gentleman from NYC with some public performance experience. Hmmm...now where could we find one of those?

As far as this I don't think a white supremist would have sex with a black person since they're against sex outside their race and especially against mixed race children.

Mentally wise I'm tough as nails but if it made me feel uncomfortable I'd just ask him to stop calling me the N word and we'd continue sex.

And NiceNYDick, the second paragraph made me lol

I'd never let someone call me that. Simply because I don't like to bring attention to the obvious contrast if I'm with a white guy. I'm the "we're all the same" kumbayah type.
Because when I'm called a nigger IRL,that shit hurts and it's degrading and I'd always worry that I'm with a white dude who really sees me as a worthless nigger. Sub human. And he'll get off On it and tell his friends what he did. isnt in love,wouldnt marry you. you really are a nigger to him. That's horrible.

Have your fun with your fetish,just be careful that you aren't with someone who really see you as some nigger woman he's screwing around with. You deserve sooooo much better than that!

So have fun with your race play,just be super careful

My fetish isn't for everybody. Some people may feel hurt but that's no different then if someone being called a slut and getting their feelings hurt during sex. Some people are just able to handle certain names better then others.

 

[nicenycdick]

...As far as this I don't think a white supremist would have sex with a black person since they're against sex outside their race and especially against mixed race children.

Mentally wise I'm tough as nails but if it made me feel uncomfortable I'd just ask him to stop calling me the N word and we'd continue sex.

And NiceNYDick, the second paragraph made me lol...

Unfortunately, Rommette, some men get off sexually on demeaning women. It is the essence of the rapist, I think. So it wouldn't suprise me at all if a white supremist coveted sex with a black woman!

And you had to laugh?!!

 

[hsarge]

Rommette, you need to read a little history. White supremacists have raped black women during slavery, and after when kkk terror ruled. Well into the 1970's in the south no white person could be convicted of any crime against a black person, even murder. Just check the murders of black and white civil rights workers. Thomas Jefferson had children by his slave Sally Hemmmings. The racist segregationist Strom Thurmond, had a child with the family's black house keeper, even while he filibustered for complete separation of the races. I know for a fact that white racists would troll for a black female to gang bang for 'sport'. Fortunately, this would not be tolerated now. But it happened, and not that long ago.

 

[D_Ginger_Vitas]

To be honest, if thats what you want from a lover--ask for it. Its not something that I would do naturally, but I would love to do it if my partner desired for me to do it. The right lover will learn your fetishes and enjoy practicing them. At least I would...

 

[Phil Ayesho]

There is no such thing as a subconscious.
If you have a fetish or fantasy, you know exactly where it comes from.

Does this fantasy reflect unresolved issues? Sure... race is an unresolved issue, Internationally... There is no one, particularly not in the USA, who is unaffected by issues of race.

Does this reflect anything seriously unusual about YOU?

Nope. Not one thing out of the ordinary. Over two thirds of women fantasize about being dominated to different degrees. Fantasies ranging rom just being held down and forcefully fucked... to being chained, whipped, raped, or made into a 'sex slave'...

In your case, you are a black woman attracted to white men and you have this same desire to feel dominated.

Given your own cultural history, and that of the white men to whom you are attracted, it is not at all surprising that some form of racial dynamic find its way into this scenario.

For you to recognize it, and be able to admit it is actually a reflection of a very mature and evolved sense of self.
Don't take it seriously... its just a notion that turns you on.

The only caveat is that there ARE real and substantive racists out there. There are White men who's own attraction to black women may be predicated in a deep need to subjugate people of color, or reflect a sense of self loathing that could result in something very ugly or even dangerous.

The key is this... find yourself a white guy who shows no sign of racial prejudice... but who has a very well developed sense of humor.
Being an interracial couple presents all sorts of challenges and awkwardness... you need to find someone who can laugh WITH you about these things. Someone who has fun with you in bed and who shows you that YOUR pleasure and YOUR excitement are the things that turn him on the most.


That is the kind of man who can enter into some role playing that you might find genuinely satisfying, and a source of good humor and understanding when the two of you are not in the heat of the moment.

When dominating a woman in bed ( who likes that sort of thing ) I might say something like "take it, bitch!"
But I would never use that word in reference to her outside of that kind of scene.

There will be times when you want this man to love you in a less dominating way... times when you might feel vulnerable and need to feel safe and comforted and cherished... and the man you are looking for is a man who can understand that role playing is just playing... and sometimes you want the real man without the mask.

 

[Catylist220]

As a white guy married to a black woman, I'm not sure if I could do it. I don't find anything wrong with it if it's what you want and what turns you on. God knows, I probably have some kink that wouldn't work for everyone. But, just understand that for a white guy who's really into you as a person, it could be very difficult. Dominance and degradation are great, but that particular word can be very touchy.

Good luck!

 

[VictorV]

I however fantasize of having sex with a white guy and he calls me racial slurs. I especially get aroused at the thought of him calling me a Nig**r. You get what I'm saying here. I want him to say this stuff while he's dominant and "man handles" me during sex.

I'd do it... just not in public :biggrin1:.

 

[jpiggly]

Rommette, I'm glad you had the chutzpah to share this.

You raise a fascinating point about "race play" and its relatively common depiction in the context of Black Men (with huge dicks, right) "degrading" "innocent" lilywhite women. Why don't we see white men degrading black women?

It's a little too real, like you said. It reflects social reality (see Sally Hemings, Sarah Baartman, etc.).

Partly, also, it's because porn is, by and large, made by white men. We know how common it is for white men to fantasize about black studs fucking white women...to the extent that they hire black men to fuck their wives.

Maybe black men fantasize about white men fucking their wives too, and just keep it to themselves? I'm not sure.

I want to believe that you'll find the white man who's willing to call you racist slurs while he's fucking you. But I have a hunch that that man may not actually be white.

I say that as somebody who thought of himself as white once, who did the whole "passing" thing for many years and could pass anytime. I couldn't have any good sex while I imagined myself to be white. As soon as I dropped the idea of whiteness I became a much more free man, sexually.

Would you be turned on if a man who may not identify as white did these things to you in bed?

It was only once I accepted my heritage (which, like almost all so-called white people, is a mixture of lots of things) that I could fuck a woman the right way. I fuck a black woman without calling her anything racist, but I do slap her ass and stuff like that, which she likes.

 

[Notthe7]

I think you're perfectly healthy and normal. Like you mentioned in your post, look at all the white female takes big black cock-porn. Further more, I'm sure there's a venue where once you're comfortable with someone.. to mention this fetish. We all have something we are kinda embarrassed about liking.. this is no different. Don't feel bad, find someone laid back and down.. that way you know once you put yourself out there, even if they don't want to try it.. they won't judge you for it.

 

[Chaotica]

You might want to try joining FetLife - there's a group there called something like "Angry White Plantation Owners" (LOL!!) and I saw another one with a similar title that described itself as being demeaning to black women. You are very brave to talk about your secret fetish. Big hugs to you, and good luck. :hug: